Author Archives: mohawkvalleygirl

Paltry Pedestrian Post

Readers who pay attention to that sort of thing may have noticed that I did not have Saturday Running Commentary yesterday. I still felt under the weather from giving blood on Friday. I suppose by now I’m going to have to begin running all over again, as I have done many times in the past. But I won’t be doing it today. Instead I took my schnoodle, Tabby, for a walk. A Pedestrian Post will have to do.

Steven left for work about quarter to nine, and I went to the grocery store (NOT worthy of a blog post). When I returned, I thought, “Oh dear, now what?” In fact, while I drove to the store I thought I probably could go running. It would not be too hot. It might be a good idea. I couldn’t talk myself into it. I could not talk myself into all the cleaning and other household chores that awaited. Well I’m sure to Tabby, a walk was the most important activity I could undertake.

I put on my crazy old lady hat. It was not particularly sunny out, and I did not expect rain. But I would feel a little more incognito in the hat. Not that I expected to run into anybody I knew, and if I did they would probably recognize me with the hat if not by the hat. It still made me feel a little better.

Then I was glad I wore it, because the sun came out. I suppose I should have expected that, with our Wait Five Minute Mohawk Valley Weather. I could even have used my sunglasses. Never mind, the hat would have to do.

We walked to Tabby’s favorite Historic Four Corners, as usual. When we started down Main Street, however, I saw a dog sitting in front of a Sam’s Deli. He was just lying there minding his own doggy business, but I could hardly count on him remaining still as another dog walked right in front of him. I could not see if he was on a leash or if his person was nearby. I convinced Tabby to cross the street.

This put us right near our church, Christ Episcopal, which, I’m sorry, I was not attending this Sunday. I was afraid Tabby would pull me right up to the door, certain there would be someone inside wanting to pet her (there probably would be; lots of dog lovers in my church). Instead we walked back up Main Street, giving me the opportunity to admire once again the old courthouse, a lovely red stone building.

Then Tabby wanted to cross right back over Main Street and go back the way we came. Oh come on, Tabby! I don’t like walking right back the way I came. She was insistent, though, so we crossed in front of Herkimer Reformed Church. Tabby spent some time sniffing the iron fence around the cemetery in the church yard. They recently re-painted the fence black, so it looks nice, although still a little bent in places. It is an old fence, and an old church (hello! Historic Four Corners; I guess the church would be old!).

I managed to talk Tabby into going up Prospect Street and down German, so we did not walk back exactly the way we came. Not much of note happened on the walk. We met a dog named Sasha, who was more interested in sniffing Tabby than in having me pet her. And I saw a lady who from a distance looked a little like Maxine from the comics. I mean this as a compliment, of course, but I’m not sure it would be taken as one, so I leave out any identifying characteristics of where this happened or who the lady may actually be (I don’t know her, but she seemed nice; she said good morning).

I had meant to have more Mohawk Valley adventures this weekend so as to have a better quality of post today. Sorry about that. Still, it is a nice day for a walk, and Tabby and I enjoyed it. We may take another walk later with Steven. I may write another blog post about it. Just so you know.

Books and Music on a Saturday

I was on Facebook this morning (hey, it’s my day off!) and I saw a post from Basloe Library in Herkimer reminding us that Guitar Group meets today. Come hear some acoustic guitar music, they invited. I love acoustic guitars! I asked what time. 11 a.m.to 2 p.m.

I had wanted to go look for some books of plays, seeking something to replace Dirty Work at the Crossroads for Ilion Little Theatres’ fall production. I had thought to go after work Monday, when Steven could join me. However, acoustic guitar music is a great bribe for going today. Also, I might as well start reading plays as soon as possible, right?

Shortly before 11, therefore, I was at the library, wandering the shelves. I tend to have better luck doing that than looking at the supposed card catalog. I call it supposed, because there are neither cards nor a catalog. It is a computer and we all know, sometimes computers mystify me (OK, it’s not that hard to mystify me). I used to rock those little cards in the drawers! But enough strolling down memory late; I was strolling amongst the shelves.

I quickly found three books of plays and one book about an old Hollywood scandal. I do love an old Hollywood scandal. I went to check them out and asked where the guitar players were.

“I can just go listen, right?” I asked.

“Oh, sure, just listen, learn to play, sing along, they don’t kick anybody out.”

“If I tried to sing, they might kick me out,” I told them, but the folks behind the counter did not think that would really happen.

I found the room and sat at a table in the corner. A man was warming up, sounding really good. A few others arrived and they were all chatting and setting up. They were obviously regulars.

They played a lot of different tunes, mostly older stuff. I confess to singing along with “Five Foot Two, Eyes of Blue.” Nobody kicked me out, but I sang quietly just in case. One man played the harmonica. I really enjoyed that. I laughed out loud when they sang the song about Rye Whiskey, particularly the verse about if the ocean was whiskey and I was a duck.

“You didn’t actually bring any whiskey, did you?” I asked. Nobody had. One man brought up the inadvisability of drinking whiskey and driving. He had a good point. I was just kidding anyways. I haven’t had whiskey in years.

I only stayed about an hour, but as I left I thanked them and told them I had enjoyed listening.

“Come again!” they invited.

“I will!” I promised. I intend to. It’s a nice way to spend a little time on a Saturday in the Mohawk Valley.

Frank J. Basloe Library is located at 245 N. Main St., Herkimer, NY, phone number 315-866-1733. They are open Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday 10 a.m. to 7 p.m., Thursday and Friday 10 a.m. to 5 p.m., Saturday 10 a.m. to 2 p.m. (closed Saturdays during July and August), closed Sundays. For information visit their website at www.midyork.org/herkimer, or you can like them on Facebook. Tell them Mohawk Valley Girl sent you.

The Post I Had Been Going to Write

Yesterday I previewed the title “Dirty Break for Dirty Works.” It’s quite possible that some reader somewhere was looking forward to such a post. It is possible that some reader or even readers was looking forward to this blog becoming All Dirty Works All The Time, as I had previously threatened (I confess to feeling some anticipation for that myself). It is also possible that I just like using the phrase Dirty Work in as many sentences as possible.

Welcome to Lame Post Friday.

I had meant to write a real post today, since yesterday’s was pretty sad (although I hope somebody somewhere derived some entertainment from it) (that’s really not so far-fetched; some people are highly entertained by saying, “What a dumb post!”) (but surely none of my readers are so snotty and superior).

The post I had been going to write concerned the postponement of Dirty Work at the Crossroads, the play being directed by my delightful husband, Steven, for Ilion Little Theatre. We are now hoping to do the show in the spring, in which case I will have the opportunity to use “Dirty Work” in many future headlines.

I was going to make a whole big story of the saga, but as I sit here, pen in hand (I’m writing this on a break at work as usual), that is really all I want to say about it. So here is my blog post about what I am not going to write a blog post about. Sufficiently lame for a Friday, I trust.

That is as much as I wrote at work today. I see now I have indulged in some inaccuracy, or is it irony, in my headline. This is not, in fact, the post I had meant to write. On the other hand, it is a post about the post I had meant to write. Is that half-baked philosophy or circular reasoning? Or a lame, not to say random observation?

In my defense, I gave blood today. It makes me woozy. I have no brains left to improve upon what I have written. Happy Friday, though, and for anybody who happens to need a pint of O Positive, if you get mine, you’re welcome.

Pre-Lame Post

Lame Post Friday is not till tomorrow. Yet here I sit with NOTHING to write about.

I’ve been thinking lately that I want to do more posts about bad movies. They are fun to write, and people seem to like them. Then I thought, will people think I do nothing but watch bad movies? Then I thought, what do I care what people think? Then I stopped arguing with myself and tried to finish writing this post.

I seem to watch a lot of television. In my defense, I usually crochet or knit while I watch, so I get projects done. Sometimes I write in the TV Journal, which is fun to do and fun to read later. I’d like to think that it is my legacy to future generations, but I rather doubt that future generations will bother to decipher my handwriting.

I often run into people who sniff, “I don’t have time to watch television.” Some of these people can still tell you the last couple of people to get voted off Survivor and which husband Kim Kardashian is on (I don’t know these things myself; what does that tell you, if anything?). Or maybe they truly do not watch television, but spend hours working on their fantasy football team or playing Farmville. To each his own, as the old lady said when she kissed the cow.

My point being, don’t sniff at how I spend my leisure time; we are none of us as productive as we could be. Oh, all right, I suppose some people are. I’m sure many, many people are at least more productive than I am. Don’t brag about it to me, though, or I will lampoon you in this blog as a thoroughly obnoxious person (ooh, scary threat).

Where was I? Nowhere, really. The real reason I’m at a loss today is that I have not been doing much this week. I actually have a topic I would like to write about, but I think that needs to wait till tomorrow at least. So I guess that’s a preview of coming attractions. Here’s a teaser: I’ll tell you my tentative title: “Dirty Break for Dirty Works.” Intrigued? Stay tuned!

A Popular Spot

Tuesday Steven and I had planned to have dinner out with a visiting friend. We thought we would take her to PK’s Pub here in Herkimer, since she had never been there before. When circumstances kept her from joining us, we saw no reason not to enjoy a dinner out ourselves. For one thing, I had already put on my nice skirt and pantyhose.

As usual, we had to search for a parking space.

“On a Tuesday night,” I marveled. “This must be the most popular spot in town!”

I knew they had found us a table on busy nights before, so I wasn’t too worried. Pete, behind the bar, invited us to sit wherever we liked. I picked the tall table in the bar area. I do love a tall table.

“And I can hang my coat on the back of the chair without it being half on the floor,” I showed Steven. It was my long teal raincoat. I had gotten a little dressed up for the occasion.

After much debate Steven ordered hats and broccoli while I got ravioli. Italian dressing on my salad, ranch on Steven’s. Both dinners came with roll and butter and what yummy butter! Steven wanted to eat the rest of it with a spoon but refrained from such behavior.

“You can bring the leftovers in to feed the woodchucks,” Pete said.

“I think I’ll eat it all myself,” I said. I intended to. The food at PK’s is delicious.

I should perhaps explain about the woodchucks. Pete works at the same place I do. He works near a door to the outside that is often open. He likes to feed some woodchucks that live nearby. When work takes me near Pete’s area, I always look for his pets. I like to see a little nature while at work.

Steven and I were not able to finish our meals so asked for boxes.

“But don’t tell Pete,” I warned the waitress. “Because I’m not bringing them in to feed the woodchucks.”

“I think he heard you,” Steven said.

I told Pete I would bring in something else for his pets.

“They like chocolate chip cookies,” he suggested.

It was a very enjoyable dinner. I hope our friend is able to visit us soon, so we will have an unassailable excuse to return.

PK’s is located at 221 King St., Herkimer, NY. Phone 315-866-3494. They are open Monday though Thursday 11 a.m. to 9 p.m., Friday 11 a.m. to 10 p.m., Saturday 4:30 to 10 p.m.

Note to self: buy chocolate chip cookies for the woodchucks. Then again, maybe I should bring them carrot sticks and not contribute to the woodchuck obesity problem.

Not Your Average Ghost Story

Steven and I continued our Sunday Horror Classic viewing (hey, that’s what the box calls them!) with The Amazing Mr. X (1948). We selected this movie using the most stringent criteria: it was the other movie on the disc with the first one we watched.

I am hesitant to write this review, because I really really don’t want to give anything away. As twists and turns go, this is the twistiest one yet. So I guess this is your Spoiler Alert. I’ll do my best not to, but…

The movie does not start out twisted. It starts out like a common or garden ghost story. A widow of two years’ standing is getting ready to go out on a date with a man who is certain to propose. Her spunky kid sister, who has a date herself, is all in favor of Widow getting on with her life. Sis picks out a sexy white dress for Widow to wear instead of the black one she had intended.

Good for you, Sis! Let’s be a little more obvious, shall we, Widow? Come on! A black dress — and not an LBD, mind you — on a date where a guy is going to propose? Shame on you!

Ah, but she remembers her husband fondly. How he loved to swim! He would run down to the ocean yelling, “Last one in’s a chicken!” Hmmm, that’s not foreshadowing, is it?

Widow decides to walk along the beach to meet her date. It will be quicker and she will enjoy the walk. Through the sand in high-heeled dress shoes. Good idea. As she walks, she seems to hear her dead husband calling her name (which I don’t remember. I think I mentioned yesterday that I watch these movies casually). I thought he sounded hoarse, even for a ghost.

Then Widow meets a stranger — handsome, of course — who tells her all about herself. He gives her his card. The card does not identify him as, nor does anybody ever call him Mr. X. I suppose that’s mere quibble, though, because he is kind of amazing.

That night the Widow is visited by a ghost — or is it only a dream? Cue spooky music. It is after this point that the plot begins to thicken. Widow visits the mysterious Mr. X (which may have been a better name for the movie, but nobody asked me), determined to contact her dead husband.

But is Mr. X a charlatan? New Fiance and Spunky Kid Sister are convinced he is. What do to? Kid Sister sets out to prove it by visiting Mr. X as a new client. Now how dumb is that? You think the guy is a charlatan, that he cleverly found out all this stuff about Widow, not that he knew it psychically. Don’t you suppose in his research he might have come across the fact that Widow has a Kid Sister?

Kid Sister quickly falls for Mr. X herself and the plot continues to thicken. And then come the plot twists that I intend to keep to myself. It gets exciting. I especially liked the dramatic climax when… Hah! Thought I was going to let something slip, didn’t you? I recommend this movie for fun, casual viewing. Steven is sorry he slept through it.

Mike Brady But Not Vincent Price

“Don’t ask any questions. Just do exactly what I tell you to do.”

“What do you want me to do?

“I said no questions!”

Those were lines from a cheesy horror flick Steven and I watched on Sunday. OK, the last line wasn’t in the movie; I said it. I thought it was witty, or do I flatter myself?

I asked Steven to pick out a monster movie. When he read the description for Blood Lust (1959) on the DVD box for this one, I had my doubts. A group of teenagers find themselves on an island owned by a bad man. He used to import exotic animals to hunt, but he got bored with that and started to hunt people. In other words, no monsters per se.

Hunting people has got to be one of the hoariest fictional cliches going. I first encountered it in a short story I was forced to read in seventh grade called “The Deadliest Game.” I think it was here that my lifelong aversion to short stories began.

In seventh grade I took most things at face value. Now I ask questions like, how is a man with no gun more dangerous than, say, a lion? Men have no natural defenses. They have no instincts and natural wiles for hiding in the forest. They don’t even blend in particularly well. It seems to me a man would be a pathetically easy target for somebody who used to hunt big game.

And yet the hunted almost always win in these stories (now I’ve given away the ending, and I left off the Spoiler Alert. My bad).

The DVD box (50 Horror Classics) (they use both terms loosely) lists for each title the most well known actor in the cast as the star. In this case, it is Robert Reed.

“You know, Mike Brady,” Steven had to tell me (I don’t have to explain Mike Brady to my younger readers, do I?).

As the opening credits roll we find out Reed is not the star but a featured player. I think he actually did have the biggest part, as the main teenager. I must say it was kind of odd to see Mr. Brady as a teenager. Of course movie teenagers are usually in their 20s at least (hello, 30-something Steve McQueen in The Blob). That doesn’t bother me. It was the wise father voice in somebody who wasn’t supposed to be old enough to drink that I found disconcerting. I got over it, though, and settled in to enjoy the movie.

It starts out with four teenagers on a pleasure boat in the ocean. One couple is fishing and the other is skeet shooting. They can’t figure out what scared the fish. Oh yeah, they’re deadly game.

Apparently they are on vacation and have hired this drunkard to drive them around in his boat. they spot an island they’ve never seen before. When the boat guy passes out, they decide to row ashore and explore till he sobers up and can drive them home.

Excuse me, what? I guess this guy has been piloting them around all week and they are not perturbed by his dipsomania (how’s that for a $4 word?). As they row away in the row boat (Mike Brady can pilot the boat close enough to the island to go ashore in a row boat, but he can’t get them back to the mainland) (seriously, this is what he tells the others), the pilot wakes up and yells after them to not go to the island, you fools. Then he passes out again.

I’m afraid I started to lose track of the movie at this point, but they soon meet Bad Island Guy and his many henchmen. I think the folks that made the movie really really wanted Vincent Price for the part and the actor they got tries his best to oblige. Sometimes this kind of thing works (notably in Mrs. Santa Claus, where the guy playing the villain channels Tim Curry). This time not so much.

Eventually our teenage adventurers find out what going on and the hunt begins. At first it seems that Bad Island Guy gives his prey a sporting chance: limited crossbow arrows for himself, a gun and chance to find ammo for the hunted. I don’t think I’m giving too much away by saying he turns out to be a dirty double-crosser.

The girls get to be a little brave and clever, although the day ends up being saved by… well, you didn’t think I was going to give that away, did you? There are some decidedly creepy moments along the way as well as a few twists and turns. Perhaps I would have seen them coming if I would have been paying more attention. Which is a pretty good argument for watching these silly flicks as casually as I do.

63 Degrees in the Sun

Since I have been suffering from one of my periodic bouts of lightheadedness, I have been unable to partake of any Mohawk Valley adventures this weekend. Saturday was fine, since I could write about my run. But Sunday? Oh dear, what to do? What to do? Finally I thought I would take my dog Tabby for a walk and write a post about that.

The first thing that struck me was the difference between indoor and outdoor temperatures. I had been lounging on the couch reading a romance novel (hey, it’s Sunday and I’m lightheaded; I’m allowed). I felt cold! I had on pants and a sweatshirt, and I put the hood up. When I looked at our thermostat, I noted that it was more than 10 degrees cooler outside: 63 as opposed to 75. Still, I took off the sweatshirt. I found my crazy old lady hat and grabbed my prescription sunglasses. It wasn’t particularly sunny out at the moment, but I figured, wait five minutes.

The temperature at first felt a little cool. I may have been more comfortable in a sweatshirt or perhaps just a long-sleeved shirt. Never mind, it was mid-afternoon. Shade was not plentiful and the sky was not completely overcast.

Sure enough, I hadn’t gone a block when I put the sunglasses on. Ah, that was better. Tabby pulled me toward Herkimer’s Historic Four Corners, one of her favorite spots to walk by. I let her stop and sniff a light post, thinking I really did not need the jacket.

She nicely did her business a mere block and a half from a trash can I know of. Sometimes she is a convenient kind of dog. I had another poop bag in my pocket, in case of the rare occurrence that she poops again. Fellow dog owners will appreciate my concern.

We walked down Main Street. I noticed Sam’s Deli, a new business we have not yet patronized, carries Steven’s favored brand of cigarettes. Oh, I know, it would be a good idea for his health and our finances if he quit. You tell him; I’m not that kind of a wife.

I felt bad as usual as we passed other closed businesses as well as buildings that haven’t housed businesses in recent memory. I admired the old buildings, though, and keep thinking I will bring my camera downtown one day and take some pictures.

Tabby wanted to walk through the little park by Basloe Library. A young man was sitting on a bench, having a loud conversation with a laptop computer. Or maybe it was one of those cell phone ear attachments and he just happened to also have a laptop computer. I did not nosily look too closely or try to listen.

After the park, Tabby pulled me down Prospect, then left onto Park Avenue and back to Main Street. More closed businesses and a few open ones. Tabby looked speculatively into Pete’s Tavern, but I reminded her she was not 21. I looked longingly at Crazy Otto’s Diner, but reminded myself I had already had breakfast. We did not go into Hummel’s Office Plus for once, and Belly Up Pub is not yet open.

By now the breeze had died down and the sun was quite warm. I was wearing dark clothes, so that didn’t help. I was happy to get back home and into the 75 degree temperature that is inexplicably cooler than 63 degrees in the sun.

Saturday Running Commentary

I believe I said last week that Running Commentary Saturday would be my new weekly feature. It was this reflection that got me into my running clothes and out the door this morning, because I did NOT feel like running. For one thing, I still felt clean from last night’s shower. Who wants to get all sweaty and dirty? Oh, I know, some people do.

It was nice and cool, and a little cloudy as I set out. It had rained in the night (which was a good thing for me since I had not watered my container garden). I pondered where to run. I hadn’t run for four days due to heat, being busy and not feeling well. Four days is bad. Five would be worse. I was glad I had talked myself into it.

My legs didn’t feel too awfully unhappy for me. I turned down German Street, not in the direction of the hill up to Herkimer County Community College. I’m still rebuilding myself. I thought I’d take another day off from hills.

I saw a man and cute little dog a couple of blocks ahead of me. I like to stop running briefly to pet a dog. The dogs usually like it too. Would I catch up? I always have to laugh at myself when I see how long it takes me to catch up to a pedestrian. Who do I think I’m kidding when I say I’m running? It’s a middle-aged shuffle and some days it is slower than others. In this case, the dog stopped and sniffed enough so I was able to catch up.

“Can I pet your dog?”

“Sure, he’s friendly.” He was actually sniffing a bush at the time and paid me not the slightest bit of attention. I petted him quick, wished the man a good day and ran on.

Lots of porches for me to envy. I thought I might have an afternoon cup of coffee or tea on mine later. Few people sitting out. I saw one man leaning on the railing of an upstairs porch, watching the world. We exchanged greetings. I ran on.

Other than the dog, it was an uneventful run. I didn’t feel “Oh yeah, I can rock this,” but I didn’t feel too terrible, either. My goal is to NOT go four days without running next week, which may be problematic. I have rehearsals almost every day for Dirty Work at the Crossroads, the play which Ilion Little Theatre is doing. In fact, this blog may become All Dirty Work All The Time. I rather like that. It has a ring to it which All Harvey All The Time and All Boilermaker All The Time lacked.

Lame Is As Lame Does

I had started to write this week’s Friday Lame Post, heavy on the half-baked philosophy and full of literary erudition (well, full of something), all about “Ode to a Grecian Urn,” but I feel philosophically unable to finish it today. Perhaps another Friday. Or it may do for a Middle-aged Musings Monday. That is for the future.

I seem to remember having kind of an existential crisis trying to write this week’s Monday Musings. It was supposed to be easy and it was not. Likewise with Lame Post Friday. I’m supposed to sit here rattling off a few random observations and some half-baked philosophy, then get on with my weekend. I can’t have two existential crises in one week. At least, I suppose I can, but I can’t very well blog about them both. So please, dear reader, ignore this paragraph, continue reading and pretend I am having an easy time of it.

Actually, as I type, I begin to think, “I can rock this.” And there is some writerly half-baked philosophy: Once you start putting words down, it is really not so difficult as it seemed when you were staring at the blank screen (or page, as the case may be). That is scarcely an original thing to say, but bear with me. I may come up with something better.

I randomly observed the most adorable little dog sticking his head out of the window of a car in front of me as I drove home today. I hoped he would not get excited and jump out, but if he did, I was prepared to throw on my emergency flashers, put the truck in park and run to the rescue. Then I saw he was sitting on a little boy’s lap, so I figured the kid would keep track of him. Good thing. That little dog could have outrun me with no problem. I probably would have been no help at all and just antagonized the motorists behind me.

I got pretty antagonized myself as I hit every light red, sitting through a couple of them twice because there was so much traffic. The other day I gave a co-worker a ride, hit most of the lights green, and observed to her how some days hitting the lights red bothers you more than others. Today it bothered me and then some. It would be nice if I could come up with some half-baked philosophy about this, wouldn’t it? Something to put it in perspective, maybe keep myself from getting so agitated next time. I’m thinking, but nothing’s coming. I guess I’ll fall back on my stand-by philosophy, “You’ll have that.”

I spent a good portion of my time at work trying to think of a lame headline. I don’t think that is a particularly good one, but it will have to do. I’m over 400 words now, so I think I can start my weekend. I’ll try to have some Mohawk Valley adventures to share, and maybe next week we can talk about “Ode to a Grecian Urn.”