The other day I drove to Fort Plain to have lunch with my swimming friends at the 5S Diner. I had no idea where it was, but they assured me I would find it if I just drove out Route 5S. They spend a while explaining it to me, because I am not very bright, and I get lost easily. Part of the confusion is that you can get to Fort Plain (and several destinations in that direction) on State Route 5.
“I guess you guys do want me to join you for lunch,” I said, “or you would have just said, ‘Oh, never mind, stay home and have a bologna sandwich!'”
I know, some people will tell me to just use my phone. I save that as a last resort in most cases. In this case I feared it would not even be available for that, because I tried to call my parents before setting out from Little Falls (where the pool is), and it wouldn’t let me make the call. The Automated Assistant kept saying the problem was solved, but he was a big fat liar. I said to heck with it and drove out Route 5S, which I have used to reach Fort Plain on other occasions (I mean “heck” not “check,” computer! This is what I get for trying to be a little less vulgar!).
It was a pretty drive through rural scenes, and the diner was quite easy to find. I was the first one there, so I sat down and ordered coffee. And noticed a great cow picture.
“Is that by a local artist?” I asked. “That is the best cow ever! It has such an expression!”
My friends soon joined me, and we had a very good meal. I had a cheeseburger with homemade chips. I have been craving a cheeseburger! I enjoyed the drive home, too.
By the way, my phone is fine. No idea what the problem was.






















