Category Archives: personal

Moody Monday Musings

As I walked into work this morning, the comforting thought occurred to me: Mondays suck; almost everybody thinks so.

To feel that we’re all in the same boat and that I’m not SUPPOSED to feel chipper and cheerful, that’s a comfort. Then I thought about my post yesterday, specifically how I scorned a DJ for always playing the song “Rainy days and Mondays always get me down” on Mondays. I asked myself, feel differently now? A little more understanding perhaps? The answer is no.

My bad Monday mood is a much more robust emotion than the gentle melancholy expressed by Karen Carpenter (I think she sang that song; it would perhaps behoove me to check before I hit “publish”). I’d just like to throw in a disclaimer here that I don’t hate my job. I actually like my job quite a bit. But it would have to be a damn good job to make me feel good about getting up at 3:30 in the morning after three days of sleeping in. No worries, though, now that I’ve been up for a while and the coffee is kicking in. I’m beginning to get a little of that chipper, cheerful feeling that eluded me earlier.

Oh dear, that kind of blows my Moody Musings, doesn’t it? Well I don’t know how fun it would have been to muse about a bad mood for 600 words or more (although I may try it sometime; you never know). I have another musing to share that’s been bugging me ever since I finished reading a pulp fiction detective novel I picked up somewhere: Why would you ever try to blackmail a murderer? You know they’ve killed once already: they know how. Why don’t you just put a big sign on your forehead that says, “Kill me too while you’re at it!” That I could go on for 600 words about.

But I shan’t go on for 600 words this Monday. I’ll keep it short and silly (perhaps you thought I was going to say short and sweet, but I always say go with your strengths). I’ll try for a real Mohawk Valley post tomorrow. Happy Monday, everybody!

Note: My musically knowledgeable husband Steven tells me Karen Carpenter did sing the melancholy Monday song.

Music to Run By

I realized I had left something out of my post about Friday’s run. I thought about that some more on Sunday’s run, so I thought, hey, that’s worth another post.

While running Friday I heard the ice cream truck. It’s a good thing I don’t carry cash when I run, or I’m sure I would convince myself that I could run just as well or better while eating ice cream. After all, the sugar would give me an energy boost, wouldn’t it? And when my hands got all sticky, I would be encouraged to run faster so as to get in the shower sooner. Well, we’ll never know about these things.

I had been noticing the ice cream truck lately and my first thought was that it was too early for such a thing. Then I thought, I eat ice cream all year round. And ice cream truck drivers have to make a living, too. I must confess, I’m not a fan of the sound of the ice cream truck. I don’t like the electronic music this one plays, and it plays the same song over and over. Sometimes you hear a different song, but then you hear that song over and over. Well I’m sure some people listen to it and all they hear is ice cream.

So there I was running and listening to the ice cream truck playing the same song I’ve heard for two or three days now. It was really OK, though, because it encouraged me to keep running and get out of earshot. We must take advantage of whatever motivation presents itself. I was happy when I no longer heard the electronic song (it’s quite out of my head today, though, so I couldn’t tell you which song it was). The funny thing was, a while later in the run, when I had been up and down the hill and had only to run on fairly level ground to home, I realized: my head was playing that tune and I was running in time to the music. I had to laugh at myself. I must admit it was a good pace to run at.

This morning when I was running, I did not hear the ice cream truck, but started thinking about playing the same tune over and over. I remember a period of time when I was getting a ride to work with a friend, and she kept the same cassette in her player (it was the ’90s). Every morning it seemed to be on the same song. I didn’t like the song, and it did not grow on me. Oh well, we learn to deal with these little inconveniences.

Then I started thinking about DJs who seem to like certain songs. In the North Country in the late ’80s, early ’90s, I listened to the radio quite a bit. One DJ played “Rainy Days and Mondays Always Get Me Down” every damn Monday. OK, we get it! You don’t like Monday! A DJ on another station played a Doors song every Friday, “Hello, I Love You, Won’t You Tell Me Your Name” (I realize I’m writing the lyrics instead of the actual titles of these songs, but I thought it would be helpful for people unfamiliar with the songs). I figured that’s what the DJ would say to some woman in a bar later that night. Do you suppose it was an effective pick up line? I should have called the station and asked him.

So I was thinking about all this as I was running. It was colder than I was dressed for, so I needed the distraction. Imagine my chagrin when I realized that for the latter part of my run I was running to the tune of “Hello, I Love You Won’t You Tell Me Your Name?” Where’s that ice cream truck when you need it?

Run of the Mill

I mentioned in a post about running up to Herkimer County Community College (HCCC) the front way and down the back that I ought to run up the back way and down the front. Yesterday I did.

The back way is more pleasant, because there is less traffic and what traffic there is often isn’t going as fast. You run through a residential area, then by some woods. There is even a little stream, going downhill, the lucky bastard.

I still have not reached the “I LOVE to run!” stage of running. I think that means the endorphins are kicking in, although I’m not very knowledgeable about biology. I don’t even always get to the “I can rock this” stage. I certainly did not feel that I could rock any hills on Friday, but I thought I’d do my best.

Up I went. A gentle upslope in the residential area, what I might say, “You call this a hill?” about when I’m in better shape. Ooh, here’s a related memory: when I was in the army, stationed in Monterey, California, I ran a lot of hills. From there I went to Texas for more training. One of my first PT (physical training) sessions, I got in the running group one step better than I should have, and was quickly in trouble. My fellow soldiers encouraged me to keep going, but I was puffing, panting and generally making a spectacle of myself. Finally they told me, “Just get up this hill and we’re done!” I had to do it, I managed to pant out, “This… is… not… a… hill.” I knew at the time how ridiculous it was: running like a fat, sedentary civilian and scorning the hill. Ah well, I amuse myself, at least.

Getting back to the present, I turned a corner and was on the twisty road up to the college. This is not as steep as the front way, but it goes on for SO LONG! I know, later in the spring and summer, it won’t seem long at all. Right now I had to call on my powers of perseverance. I made it! Soon I was looking at the view from the top. Beautiful! I could see over to the next mountain. I wondered how I might get to the road I saw on it. Um, not that I intend to run there, or even that I would be able to run there, even later in the summer.

Downhill is a beautiful thing. Really, all you have to do is shuffle your feet a little and let gravity do the work. It was too cold for me to stop at the spring for a drink. My hands were feeling stiff as it was. My ears were cold, too. Was is it with all the wind these days?

I felt happy about my run. Looking back over this post, though, I see that there was nothing unusual or striking about it. Dare I say, nothing blogworthy? And yet, here I am, posting the blog.

Insert Lame Headline Here

Welcome to Lame Post Friday, where once again I shall try to entertain with random observations and half-baked philosophy. Full disclosure: I’m sitting at my computer with my fingers on the keyboard, hoping something pops into my brain.

I just went back and re-read my Lame Friday Post from the day after Thanksgiving (it was a rare Friday I had off, as is today, so I thought it might help). I ended with a bit of half-baked philosophy I’d like to expand upon if I may (of course I may, it’s my blog; I just felt like adding “if I may”) (I’m in kind of a silly mood, you may have noticed).

I remembered the saying “No life is wasted; you can always stand as a bad example to others.” I’ve always taken comfort in that saying. Don’t be like me, everybody! But then I got to thinking, to really make my bad example useful, don’t I need to actually show it to people? Wouldn’t it be more helpful if I exposed all my stupid mistakes, via blog or memoir, so others could learn? EEEEK! I don’t want to do that! People will just have to observe me all on their own, if they’re interested. If I ever write my memoirs (doubtful; I write fiction), it’s going to be all lies. Any friends and family reading this, if you want me to make up some good ones about you, let me know.

Well that didn’t take up much time. I did have a random observation the other day. When I was walking Tabby, I think I saw a bona fide crazy old lady (my computer is telling me bona fide is wrong, but I just looked it up in the dictionary. Stupid computer!). At least, I didn’t stare, so I don’t know how old she was. Then again, I call myself a crazy old lady but to some I’m just a young pup.

I was walking Tabby, wearing my own crazy old lady hat, when I saw walking toward me on the opposite side of the street a lady who looked like she was wearing a similar hat. When she got a little closer, I could see it was wide brimmed like mine, but a nicer shape and a bit fancier. The lady was dressed all in black, right down to her high heeled boots. She strode down the road, grandly ignoring a perfectly good sidewalk. Her chest was out, her head was high. Normally when I meet other pedestrians or runners, I call a greeting or remark, but I felt a little intimidated by this woman. She looked neither left nor right, and I didn’t even feel that I should be taking a closer look at the hat, as I was. I put my eyes front too and kept walking.

Oh, speaking of calling greetings to people, here is another observation. Walking Tabby yesterday, I saw a lady with a baby carriage crossing at a four way stop. I was just reaching the corner as she was halfway across, and Tabby stopped to sniff a promising post. The car going one way stopped, the truck going the opposite direction kept going! She was still in the first half of her cross when he went by, but still! I yelled, “The nerve of that guy, not stopping for a baby carriage!” The lady didn’t say anything, but the toddler in the carriage gave us a friendly wave and yelled, “Hi!” Of course I waved back.

OK, two observations, one philosophy. I say that’s not a bad Friday. I’ll get off the computer now, and seek out some Mohawk Valley adventures so I can come up with a non-lame post for Saturday.

Swamp Women or Mannix in Bondage

This past weekend I asked Steven if he would like to watch a “Horror Movie Classic” with me. I put it in quotes, because I am quoting the DVD box. “50 Horror Classics,” actually. I guess “classic” has different definitions, depending on who you ask. I would use a different c word to describe most of these offerings: cheesy.

Steven picked Swamp Women from 1955. I would not call it a horror movie, exactly. Maybe suspense/exploitation. And not as exploitative as you might think watching the opening credits. They show all these pictures of women with their hands tied behind their backs. Ooh. I noted that the director was Roger Corman. That alone makes it work a watch, I thought.

The movie opens with what looked to me like pretty obvious stock footage of a parade interspersed with actual movie scenes. The guy who would later play Mannix and this fairly sexy girl are flirting. She is after his money, but he doesn’t seem to mind. He has oil wells. She volunteers to accompany him into the swamp, where he has to go for some poorly defined business reason, to show him how tough she can be (any guesses on how that’s going to work out?).

Having thus set up the victims, the movie moves on to the villains. They are a set of gangster molls in a prison. They know where some diamonds are, so the head cop sends the best policewoman he knows into the prison to infiltrate the gang. The idea is she’ll help the girls escape then follow them to the diamonds. This turns out to be surprisingly easy and little time is spent in the prison (so no shower scene; I told you it was not as exploitative as they pretend).

I don’t like to say much else about the plot, because I hate to give too much away. I will mention that Mannix is the one that spends most of the picture with his hands tied behind his back. I’m sure some female viewers found this a delightful image. I’m not sure what it says, if anything, about Roger Corman’s fantasies. I’ll leave the reader to his or her own speculations.

The most unrealistic aspect of the picture to me was the utter lack of insects in the swamp. Not one mosquito was slapped. Did we miss the scene where they slathered on the Deet?

On the whole, I enjoyed the movie. I’m not sure I’ll ever feel the urge to pop it in again. However, if I happen to be in the mood to see a picture with a few good girl fights and Mannix in bondage, I’m all set.

Mega Millions Musings

I was never more in need of a Middle-aged Musings Monday than I am today.

I composed that line in my head as I drove into work, but then I had such a good laugh I started feeling better about everything. I am happy to announce that I am one of the winners of the Mega Millions Jackpot. A portion of it, anyways. Five cents. That’s right, I have a one fortieth share of a two dollar winning ticket.

A co-worker went around last week collecting $1 from anyone who wanted to participate. Well, you often hear about groups of workers going in together and sharing big winnings. The odds are astronomically opposed, of course, but sometimes somebody wins. Suppose it was my co-workers. Did I want to be the one person showing up for work on Monday because I was too cheap to throw in a lousy buck? I did not.

A friend of mine says it’s a dollar’s worth of fantasy. I’ve found it’s worth a lot more than that in laughs.

First we had to question Joanie’s level of wheeler-dealership (if it were not all in fun we’d be questioning her integrity, but remember, folks, these are just silly jokes). She could have kept the forty bucks and just said she bought the tickets. Nobody really believed that one, but some of us thought she might tell us we didn’t win BUT… Actually, I was of the opinion she would send us a post card from the Bahamas telling us we didn’t win.

Joanie circumvented such speculation by distributing photocopies of all the numbers. I praised her honesty and told her my Bahamas prediction. She admitted it was tempting.

“Cindy who? Cindy who?” she said, practicing not knowing me when she was a millionaire.

As you may have noted in the news, there were no million dollar winners in the Mohawk Valley. I came to work all set to tell Joanie how disillusioned I was. Not being a millionaire was just one more burden added to my Monday Malaise. Oh, stop playing that miniature violin, I wasn’t really dragging that bad, I’m just telling a story.

And then in walks Joanie, announcing that we are all winners to the tune of two dollars. Two dollars! Yay! It’s the principle of the thing, after all.

“You want the nickel?” she asked.

Actually, Joanie intends to reinvest our winnings in two more tickets. Wouldn’t that be a kick in the head if one of them won?

Yet Another Running Post

Did I mention the most interesting thing I do these days is run?

I mentioned on Facebook that I thought I’d run up the hill to Herkimer County Community College (HCCC). That gave me a little motivation. Of course, that is one of my favorite Sunday runs. The road to the college is less traveled on a Sunday. Also, I haven’t been to work (usually) and don’t have much I have to do after the run, so an extra strenuous run is in order.

I had previously gone to breakfast and gone shopping. I was just picking up a few things but it annoyingly necessitated three stops. Still, that meant it was about an hour since I’d eaten by the time I got home. The clouds looked threatening, so I thought I’d get while the gettin’ was good, as the saying goes.

As I ran down German Street toward the college, I thought I saw a dog I know named Nicky. I should have known it wasn’t him, because he’s usually out walking much earlier. In my defense, my running glasses are a good three prescriptions ago (how well do you need to see while running? Stuff I might run into is usually pretty big). I ran across the street in hopes of petting a friend, quickly saw it was not the same dog or owner, thought I might pet a cute strange dog, but only succeeded in upsetting the pooch. He jumped, barked and growled; the owner pulled on the leash and told him to behave. I apologized and kept running. I felt really stupid as I re-crossed the street, because it must have looked as if I had crossed the street specifically to upset a dog. Oh dear.

Now I was running faster than I’m used to, as a result of crossing the street twice in rapid succession. I thought I ought to slow down to an easier pace, but I am really not that good at pace. My body tends to run at the speed it wants to run. Usually, I admit, not very fast. As soon as I started up the hill, the slow pace came naturally. I did the trick of looking at my feet, so I wouldn’t notice how big the hill was. That worked great; I barely noticed the gradient. Then, of course, being human, I had to look up to see where I was. Yikes! But I have run that hill many times now and made it to the top every time. I had confidence.

The problem with putting a major hill right in the middle of your run is, you get to the top of the hill and you’re tired, but you have to keep running. I looked at the view of Herkimer to distract myself. Gorgeous. Was it just Herkimer I was seeing, or could I see Ilion and/or Mohawk? I looked for landmarks I might recognize even at the distance, realized I was drifting out into the road and stopped looking. Once the gradient evened out, I didn’t even feel too tired. This running is all right.

I turned toward the back road to go back down into town and added a few steps by going down a little stretch past a Do Not Enter sign. I know, they are talking about cars, not middle aged ladies running slowly, but I like to pretend I’m a rebel. Soon I was going downhill and life was sweet.

The back road to HCCC is longer, twistier and a little less steep than the front way. I must run up that way next time. The back way is the way down on the DARE 5K. I saw the little path the DARE run takes, with the gate closed and locked as it usually is. That was a big motivation for me to run the DARE 5K, to see where that little path went. I saw where a runner could easily get around the gate and go down the path, but I refrained. It’s one thing to be a rebel, but running down a closed path is just dumb. Suppose something stupid happened like a sprained ankle or a heart attack (I am 48 years old)? Would I be likely to encounter a kind stranger to help me? I had another rebel opportunity a block later anyways, when I defied a No Left Turn sign.

So my run was pretty OK. I encountered a couple of other runners and told them, “Looking good!” I said “Good morning,” to a some pedestrians. My dog was very happy to see me when I got home and graciously walked my cool down with me. I hope to find other Mohawk Valley adventures sometime, but for now I highly recommend running in Herkimer, NY.

Another Good Run, So There!

There are going to be a lot of running blogs between now and the Boilermaker. This is pretty much what I am doing right now: work, Harvey rehearsals, and run. Running makes the best posts.

I ran later than normal on a day off today, because I went to help work on the set for Harvey. Harvey, in case you had forgotten or never knew, is the play I’m in with Ilion Little Theatre. For the last play I was in, I barely made it to rehearsals and almost never to set construction, due to the retail hours I was then working. Now I work days with many weekends off, so I was happy to go try to help this morning. I don’t know that I helped much. I held a couple of things for others. It helped me, though, because I had some good laughs with some nice people. I love Ilion Little Theatre.

So I put on shorts and short-sleeves to run, because the thermostat in my house said the outdoor temperature was 44 degrees. Having been outside, I suspected it was colder, but I didn’t have time to worry about it. Right away my hands were cold. Oh dear, was this going to be an uncomfortable run? Never mind, keep running. At least the rest of me would probably warm up.

I ran a hill I know of out Main Street. I had to cross German Street, but that wasn’t too bad with Saturday afternoon traffic. Up I went. It’s a pretty good hill. When I went to turn right to get to the down slope, I ran across the middle of the road, to travel the shortest distance. That was the one time a car happened to be coming. Oops. Luckily, the car turned into a driveway before I was actually in its way.

Now I was going downhill. Aaahh! A great, effortful hill out of the way and I was not even a third of the way into my intended time. What a great feeling! I suppose somebody else may have sought out another hill, just to be that way. I merely kept running.

I ran by a couple of No Parking signs outside of a house. No worries there; I wasn’t about to park it just then. I saw a van parked near one of the signs, but perhaps the sign was not talking to him. I turned onto the little path over what used to be the hydraulic canal. That’s a nice place to run.

I crossed back over German Street at the four way stop at Main Street. I waited for one car, then ran across, waving “thank you” to the cars that waited for me. As I continued down German, a lady on Washington waved me across in front of her. I thought that was very nice of her, because it’s not always easy to get onto German where there’s not a four way stop. By waiting for me, she may have missed her chance. I think she got out OK, but by then I was down another section of the erstwhile hydraulic canal.

After that I went through the parking lot of the county office building, just for something different. No traffic there on a weekend. I turned down Green Street and sprinted to make the green light at Washington. Then I changed direction to go by a sign I saw on the church there for a Rummage Sale. May 3 and 4. Phew, not today! Will I remember it by May? I hope it will be in the paper in case I don’t.

Next I turned and went through the parking lot between the church and Fire Station, then through the parking lot of the Police Station and Village Offices. I saw a bench that said “Shop Local.” Well I do, then I blog about it, I thought. I continued through another parking lot by what used to be a bank and headed towards a “Do Not Enter” sign. I love to Enter where it tells me not to.

It turned out to be a good time to cross Main Street, then it was through Myers Park and home. By this time I was feeling terrific. Even my hands were not too cold. I realized I had spend most of the run feeling pretty damn good, and that made me feel really good. Maybe I’m going to make a success of this running thing after all!

Nuthin’ Friday

I am in a bad mood. There, I’ve said it.

I bill this as “my totally fun blog,” and I try to be upbeat and positive and even rah-rah, giving shout-outs to local businesses, boosting local charities and spotlighting community events. I even try to put a positive spin on posts about difficult runs. And some days… I just don’t jolly well feel like it.

Today is Lame Post Friday, which usually comes to my rescue at times like this. A few random observations, a couple of half-baked philosophies, and I start feeling pretty cheerful. The act of writing actually boosts my mood. Today, I got nuthin’.

I tell myself there’s no reason to feel bad that I’m in a bad mood. Everybody gets in a bad mood once in a while, some people more than others. Still, there’s no reason to inflict my bad mood on others, least of all my innocent blog readers. Readers of my blog are, I believe, here to be amused, maybe informed, dare I say, entertained. Or else they clicked on a link by accident are are saying, “What the H*%#@ is this?” (in which case, I believe most computers are equipped with a handy “X” somewhere that will get rid of any offending web page)

There is no denying that I am down. My choices are: try to get myself into a better mood, try to find something funny to say about my bad mood, stop writing now and try to write my post later. I pick three.

So now it’s later. I typed in what I wrote earlier, because I still got nuthin’ (I really want to type “nothing” but I believe the correct expression is “I got nuthin'”). I did achieve a better mood at work, by dint of making silly jokes with my co-workers and laughing. Nothing worth repeating, but we amused ourselves. Then I got in a not so good mood after work with another not so fun run that I may blog about tomorrow. Now I’m showered and had a cup of coffee while I typed in what I wrote earlier.

Coffee! Why didn’t I think of that before? I’m feeling much better. Still not very bright, though, so, lame as this is, this is today’s post. Happy Friday, everybody.

Keep Running, Cindy!

I had it in my head that Wednesday’s run was going to be a good run and I was going to blog about it. I thought how my last couple of running posts had been about difficult runs and I felt a little uncomfortable with that. Of course, it’s a good thing to persevere through a difficult run and to write about it; the one thing helps the other, without a doubt. But I don’t want to give the impression that all my runs are difficult runs. If all I’m doing is persevering, I think it’s time to find a new hobby slash workout (I really felt the need to write the word “slash” and not use a “/”).

It helped that the weather cooperated. Warmer, not humid, nice. Shorts and short sleeves were definitely the way to go. I felt pretty OK as soon as I started out.

I wanted to run the hill by Valley Health Services. That necessitated crossing German Street, not always easy with four o’clock traffic. I managed it at the three-way stop at Caroline Street, waving “thank you” to the cars that didn’t run me over. The hill is what I would call respectable. Not as challenging as the hill to Herkimer County Community College, but not negligible. Respectable.

I shuffled up it, thinking how my previous method (and I’m not the only one to use it) was to sprint up hills. My reasoning was, get up it as quickly as possible, so the difficulty only lasted a short time. It was not a good method. Slow and steady wins the race (is that a cliche? Should I have added “as they say” or some other self-deprecating, post-ironic phrase?).

On my way down, on the other side of the building, I saw a lady walking away carrying a large umbrella.

“Didn’t need the umbrella after all,” I called.

“No, it’s beautiful,” she said.

“Oh, it sure is!”

There were still clouds, but as I rounded the corner some sunlight broke through and lit up some forsythia bushes. I love forsythia. It’s beautiful and fun to say. Now the sun was behind me with dark clouds in front of me. I admired the effect. I checked out my shadow on the sidewalk. Still lumpy. Keep running, Cindy.

My run seemed to be taking a long time. I felt that I was running very slowly. That’s all right; you mostly have to run slow on the Boilermaker. With 14,000 runners, I don’t see things thinning out much as we go. I started thinking about the Boilermaker and how I’d wave to people cheering the runners on. I can say silly things like, “My fans, how they adore me.” I mentally calculated how many weeks till the Boilermaker and how long I would be running if I added 10% each week, as recommended by those guys at the Sneaker Store. As long as I’m up to an hour I’ll feel comfortable. If you can run one hour, you can run two. You just don’t stop.

I did not need to put on a sweatshirt for my cool down walk with Tabby. I felt happy about my run and even happier when I thought about running this weekend NOT after a 10 hour workday. So you see, not all my runs are difficult or un-fun. And I bet they’ll get even better. See you at the Boilermaker!