Tag Archives: writing

Desperate Times Call for Lame Measures

Posted on December 8, 2012 by mohawkvalleygirl

If ever I was in need of Lame Post Friday, today is the day.

For those of you just tuning in (I know I say this almost every week, but I believe I do occasionally have new readers), Lame Post Friday is the day I let myself off the hook with random observations and half-baked philosophy. It’s actually reprehensible of me, because I let myself off the hook on many occasions: Middle-aged Musings Monday, Wrist to Forehead Sunday, Non Sequitur Thursday (although I’ve only had one of those so far). Even Running Commentary Saturday is a little, dare I say, lame.

In my defense, I don’t always use these handy little hide-behinds. If I have something to write about, I write about it. In my further defense, I sometimes get a lot of “likes” on these silly posts.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: if I’m going to post every day, some of the posts are going to be lame. One might argue (you know, that one that’s always ready to argue. I hate that one): so don’t post every day! Wait till you have something to say! I think I’ve had that argument in this space before. So sorry to repeat myself.

It is pouring rain out (random observation #1). This is sad news for me and for the blog, because I was going to go to a tree lighting in Weller Park in Mohawk tonight. It would have made a great post tomorrow (or do I flatter myself?)! Hmm, guess it’s time for some half-baked philosophy about how it’s OK, because…

I got nuthin’. This is it folks: a short post, one random observation. I’ll do one thing. I’ll save this as a draft and post it after I eat. Maybe something will occur to me while I dine.

NOTE: Nothing occurred to me. But I did have some Heidleberg Bread, baked right here in Herkimer, NY from local ingredients. My Mohawk Valley Girl cred survives.

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I Suppose It Actually Is Friday

Posted on November 24, 2012 by mohawkvalleygirl

Really, Wednesday was my Friday this week, but I didn’t post lame then, so I thought, “Hey! I can have Lame Post Friday today!”

As soon as I wrote that, I felt sure that some pedantic person out there is saying, “Stop with the ‘my Friday,’ ‘Not Really Friday’ already! Wednesday is Wednesday! Friday is Friday! And nobody wants to read your lame posts anyways!”

OK, it’s not some generic pedantic person out there, it is one of the many critics in my head. The fact is I don’t have a damn thing to write about and I want to make this post so I can get on to the sitting on the couch watching cheesy movies portion of my day. Well, that’s not really true. I have a few subjects, but the fact is I have not written about them.

“So write about them now!” says the little voice in my head that thinks everything is just so easy. The bastard.

Sometimes the act of writing begets more writing. You get just one sentence or phrase or even word down on the paper and others follow. Some days, not so much. You get one word. Gritting your teeth, you make it a phrase. Straining to keep your fingers from the backspace button, you make it a sentence. Then the little voice in your head says, “Nobody wants to read that crap!”

And that’s where I’m at now. Seriously, I just erased three sentences before leaving “And that’s where I’m at now.”

Earlier I went up the attic and found our Christmas CDs. Before that I was at Hannaford, where I purchased some Bigelow Oolong Tea, of which I am sipping a cup. It tastes so good, I wish I could write a whole blog post just on that. Mostly I wish I could just sit and sip it and enjoy the GRP Christmas Collection which is currently playing.

And really, why not (stand by for a foray into a Middle-aged Musing)? It is the Friday of my four day weekend. Yesterday was a holiday. I worked hard all last week and weekend. I am now going to relax.

And tomorrow I will write a better blog post for your delectation. I hope.

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But It Really IS Wrist to Forehead Sunday!

Posted on November 19, 2012 by mohawkvalleygirl

I know I signed off yesterday promising Mohawk Valley adventures for the foreseeable future. I even had a few yesterday. And today I am EXHAUSTED!

I guess not really. I guess “exhausted” would mean there is nothing left. No brain to think of a word to say. No energy to lift a pen or push a keyboard. Exhausted.

If this was Lame Post Friday, I cold go off into some half-baked philosophy about How We Exaggerate. I’m EXHAUSTED! I’m STARVING! I’m DYING! Some of us go through life in a perpetual wrist to forehead state. I’m trying to confine it to Sunday but, I admit, with indifferent success.

I really had a pretty fun day yesterday. After work, I took my dog for a very pleasant walk. I got a pedicure, and I went shopping in New Hartford with a friend. Then I came home and fixed supper for my husband. Wow! What a woman! (Just kidding. Nobody needs to post lengthy comments on how much MORE stuff THEY did.) (Unless you feel strongly about it; I don’t mind reading lengthy comments.)

Where was I? I don’t really remember, because, as sometimes happens, the act of writing has refreshed me. Or maybe it was the cheese, grapes and apple I’m eating (I’m on a break at work). In any case, I’m feeling better now. I would say the wrist is off my forehead, but you all know it was not really there to begin with (so difficult to eat cheese, grapes and apple with one hand while writing).

And here is where I kind of laugh at myself as a blogger. When I get home, I intend to type the preceding bit of self-therapy into the computer and call it a post. Is this a great hobby or what?

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Wrist to Aching Forehead

Posted on November 12, 2012 by mohawkvalleygirl

I checked. A mere three days ago I did a lame post about Why I Can’t Write a Post Today. It’s really too soon for another. Then again, it is Wrist to Forehead Sunday. And I have a headache. I want to write this post and not have it hanging over me for the rest of my day.

I don’t actually have a wrist to my forehead. For one thing, I don’t like to type with only one hand. I learned the two-hands-don’t-look-at-them method back in high school and I still find it fun and a little fascinating. Sometimes I just love to feel my fingers going to the right letters in rapid succession.

I really love writing a blog. It makes me write every day, and I love to write. And it is extremely easy to write. I don’t have to worry about what might this character do next, have I included enough clues but hidden them cleverly enough, is this what the teacher really wanted in answer to the essay question (oh yeah, like I ever worried about that one!)?

Some might say it is lazy, self-indulgent and not real writing (whatever that is). I say, oh, be quiet, it’s fun! You don’t have to read it. (Actually, I think it is the critic in my head who said it and she in fact does have to read it, because she is in my head and I’m reading it. I may have voices in my head, but I am not completely disassociative.)

Now I am being silly (say it ain’t so!). I intend to post this then go begin a marathon of watching old movies I can write blog posts about. When Steven comes home we may have a Mohawk Valley adventure that I can also write a blog post about. If only my headache goes away.

Let’s just chalk up today to another Blogger’s Sick Day. As usual, I will try again tomorrow. Thanks for reading!

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In My Defense, I’m in a Play

Posted on October 25, 2012 by mohawkvalleygirl

This is a Mid-Week Middle-Aged Musing. At least, that’s what I’m calling it. In fact, once again, I got nuthin’.

Part of the problem is that I am in another play at Ilion Little Theatre. You see, after Dirty Work at the Crossroads got postponed, our little group needed another play for our fall production. After much discussion (to put it mildly), we decided to host another group’s play.

Angela Harris, a Mohawk Valley native, has written a readers’ theatre piece about the Little Falls textile strike of 1912, entitled Strike Story. It was presented in the Black Box Theatre at Canal Place in Little Falls recently (I may have mentioned in a blog post that Steven and I attempted to attend but it was sold out). One of our members went to see it, liked it and thought it would work just fine on our stage. The Little Falls group was amenable, and so it was arranged.

Unfortunately, not all participants could make all the production dates that were set. This is where I come in. I was suggested for one of the parts. I felt so flattered, how could I say no? I somehow had the impression it was a small part. Thinking back, I don’t know where I got that impression, because it is not the case. It is kind of a large part. Oh dear.

All this by way of saying, I have been studying my part on breaks at work, not writing blog posts. I made it OK yesterday by running after work and writing about that. Today after work I had to do something else (which may make tomorrow’s blog post), and somehow it got to be after 6:30 and I have neither fixed supper nor made my blog post.

Anyways, here is the one musing I can come up with: I am a theatre junkie. I just can’t say no! It doesn’t matter what it is, if it is theatre and somebody asks me to do it, I jump in with both feet. In this case, I am kind of glad I did it. I never did readers’ theatre before, I love local history, and I am inspired that this lady actually wrote a whole script and finished it. I’m going to start writing myself. Only, it seems, not blog posts. Try me again tomorrow, and Happy Wednesday.

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Saturday Evening Post

Posted on October 14, 2012 by mohawkvalleygirl

OK, I don’t have anything today except for that (I think) fabulous title, and it took me all day to come up with that.

As regular readers (I sure hope I still have some) know, I am hesitant to start running again, due to recent back problems, so Saturday Running Commentary was out. Fine, I thought, I’ll go for a walk. Tabby will like that.

And at first, she certainly seemed to. But two blocks in, she did her business and clearly indicated she was done walking, she wanted to go home.

I had some library books I had to return. We drove in the truck (no, there weren’t that many books that it needed a truck; I drive a truck). The library wasn’t open yet, so I put the books in the depository while Tabby waited for me in the truck. Nothing blogworthy there.

Back home, I started cleaning my house. That is, of course, startling and incredible news to those who know me. Blogworthy? Well, I did threaten to do a cleaning post, after several cooking posts once. Funny how cooking is so much more fun and creative than cleaning when they often get mentioned together as chores that couples ought to share (just a little half-baked philosophy; I don’t think my Friday Lame Post included any of that).

In desperation, I took a nap. Ever try to sleep when you’re desperate? OK, neither did I. I took a nap because I got up with Steven at 3:30, because he had to be in to work at 6, much like he often gets up with me at 3:30, because my overtime day starts at 5.

I thought, sleep, coffee, then I’ll write the blog post. Uh, and it looks like I did. Wait a minute, I’ve done this post before. “I had to write a post. But first I did this, then I did this, then I did this, then I wrote the post, and here it is.” That hoary fictional cliche, where the writer’s adventure turns out to be the movie or book we’ve just been watching or reading. I believe I even mentioned that cliche. I think it was last Friday’s Lame Post.

Oh well, what the hell, as a wise woman once said (it was my mother). At least this, this, and this that I did was different. Let’s call it a template for when I just can’t come up with anything. At any rate, Steven is home now. I’ll see if I can drag him on a Mohawk Valley adventure so I’ll have something better to blog about.

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The Post I Had Been Going to Write

Posted on September 22, 2012 by mohawkvalleygirl

Yesterday I previewed the title “Dirty Break for Dirty Works.” It’s quite possible that some reader somewhere was looking forward to such a post. It is possible that some reader or even readers was looking forward to this blog becoming All Dirty Works All The Time, as I had previously threatened (I confess to feeling some anticipation for that myself). It is also possible that I just like using the phrase Dirty Work in as many sentences as possible.

Welcome to Lame Post Friday.

I had meant to write a real post today, since yesterday’s was pretty sad (although I hope somebody somewhere derived some entertainment from it) (that’s really not so far-fetched; some people are highly entertained by saying, “What a dumb post!”) (but surely none of my readers are so snotty and superior).

The post I had been going to write concerned the postponement of Dirty Work at the Crossroads, the play being directed by my delightful husband, Steven, for Ilion Little Theatre. We are now hoping to do the show in the spring, in which case I will have the opportunity to use “Dirty Work” in many future headlines.

I was going to make a whole big story of the saga, but as I sit here, pen in hand (I’m writing this on a break at work as usual), that is really all I want to say about it. So here is my blog post about what I am not going to write a blog post about. Sufficiently lame for a Friday, I trust.

That is as much as I wrote at work today. I see now I have indulged in some inaccuracy, or is it irony, in my headline. This is not, in fact, the post I had meant to write. On the other hand, it is a post about the post I had meant to write. Is that half-baked philosophy or circular reasoning? Or a lame, not to say random observation?

In my defense, I gave blood today. It makes me woozy. I have no brains left to improve upon what I have written. Happy Friday, though, and for anybody who happens to need a pint of O Positive, if you get mine, you’re welcome.

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Lame Is As Lame Does

Posted on September 15, 2012 by mohawkvalleygirl

I had started to write this week’s Friday Lame Post, heavy on the half-baked philosophy and full of literary erudition (well, full of something), all about “Ode to a Grecian Urn,” but I feel philosophically unable to finish it today. Perhaps another Friday. Or it may do for a Middle-aged Musings Monday. That is for the future.

I seem to remember having kind of an existential crisis trying to write this week’s Monday Musings. It was supposed to be easy and it was not. Likewise with Lame Post Friday. I’m supposed to sit here rattling off a few random observations and some half-baked philosophy, then get on with my weekend. I can’t have two existential crises in one week. At least, I suppose I can, but I can’t very well blog about them both. So please, dear reader, ignore this paragraph, continue reading and pretend I am having an easy time of it.

Actually, as I type, I begin to think, “I can rock this.” And there is some writerly half-baked philosophy: Once you start putting words down, it is really not so difficult as it seemed when you were staring at the blank screen (or page, as the case may be). That is scarcely an original thing to say, but bear with me. I may come up with something better.

I randomly observed the most adorable little dog sticking his head out of the window of a car in front of me as I drove home today. I hoped he would not get excited and jump out, but if he did, I was prepared to throw on my emergency flashers, put the truck in park and run to the rescue. Then I saw he was sitting on a little boy’s lap, so I figured the kid would keep track of him. Good thing. That little dog could have outrun me with no problem. I probably would have been no help at all and just antagonized the motorists behind me.

I got pretty antagonized myself as I hit every light red, sitting through a couple of them twice because there was so much traffic. The other day I gave a co-worker a ride, hit most of the lights green, and observed to her how some days hitting the lights red bothers you more than others. Today it bothered me and then some. It would be nice if I could come up with some half-baked philosophy about this, wouldn’t it? Something to put it in perspective, maybe keep myself from getting so agitated next time. I’m thinking, but nothing’s coming. I guess I’ll fall back on my stand-by philosophy, “You’ll have that.”

I spent a good portion of my time at work trying to think of a lame headline. I don’t think that is a particularly good one, but it will have to do. I’m over 400 words now, so I think I can start my weekend. I’ll try to have some Mohawk Valley adventures to share, and maybe next week we can talk about “Ode to a Grecian Urn.”

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But I Like to Write

Posted on September 1, 2012 by mohawkvalleygirl

I did not write my blog post while at work today. I worked on my novel. There, I’ve said it.

I don’t like to talk about the fact that I’m writing a novel. I’ve started too many novels and not finished them. I used to talk about my novels all the time. It was a mistake. I usually got a disgusted look and “That’s been done.” The worst (although I’m sure she didn’t mean it that way) was a friend who said I needed a Kilgore Trout. Kilgore Trout, if you did not know, was a Kurt Vonnegut character. Trout was a novelist, and Vonnegut would describe the books he wrote. In other words, I am only a fictional novelist.

It’s true, I suppose. I’ve written pages and pages of novels but only ever finished one. And it wasn’t very good. I know a lot of crap gets published. I know because I read some of it. Some of it I start reading and can’t finish because it’s too crappy and, as noted, I’m not hung up on finishing things. However, the crappiest novel published has one advantage over all but one of mine: it is finished.

This is not what I meant to write about. I set out to do a common or garden Friday Lame Post (“common or garden” is one of my favorite descriptive phrases). In the interests of accuracy, I like to say whether I write my post at work or compose it at the keyboard. So I suppose it was in the interests of accuracy that I blurted out the reason why I hadn’t written the post at work.

I don’t know why I should suddenly feel all exposed to my readers, like I’ve let fall some shameful secret. In the first place, many of my readers are my friends and family, who must surely know I have not given up on my dream of writing novels. And I am willing to bet that most bloggers are closet novelists (which is not quite the same thing as a real estate novelist, as sung about by Billy Joel). I like to think most people write a blog because they LIKE TO WRITE.

Ooh, there’s a bit of half-baked philosophy; maybe I can segue back into Lame Post Friday from here. Bloggers like to write. I like to write. However, I have seen quotes from writers (I’m a big one for reading collections of notable quotes) to the effect of: I hate to write but love to have written. I think I may have talked about this before. How lame is that, to repeat myself? I AM segueing back into Lame Post Friday!

Random observation (just to make my Lame Post Friday complete): it is a full moon tonight, the second full moon of August. Some say that makes it a blue moon, but there was some discussion on Facebook that what really makes a blue moon is four in one season. Huh? I’m not about to Google it and join in the fight.

I am about 500 words into the post and I have not yet reiterated for anyone unfamiliar with the term that Lame Post Friday is my day for random observations and half-baked philosophy. It is my day to Post Dumb if I feel like it. Guess I felt like it in spades today. Happy Friday, everyone.

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