Category Archives: Lame Post Friday

Not Lengthy, But Lame

Posted on April 4, 2015 by mohawkvalleygirl

Well, I made it to Lame Post Friday. I know, I’ve been pretty lame all week. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I just feel brain dead and disinclined to do anything. It is uncomfortable for me and does not make for interesting reading for you. But I shall persevere and hope you will stick with me till things get better.

Lame Post Friday is traditionally my day for random observations and half-baked philosophy. First a word about half-baked philosophy. A Facebook friend of mine (not a good friend) insists on constantly making the observation that half-baked philosophy is gooey and doughy. It’s an EXPRESSION for Gods’ sake! You don’t need to bring up a disgusting mental image. But if we must view it as a metaphor, sometimes half-baked is crunchy, as in pasta or vegetables. Sometimes it is liable to break on impact, as in pottery. Sometimes it is just cold in the middle, as in any number of things you might bake. So there.

Enough about half-baked philosophy, how about some random observations? I saw an extremely happy dog bouncing about at the end of his leash this morning. I wanted so bad to roll down my window and call, “Look at that happy dog!” Sometimes people are happy to hear you say such things, sometimes not so much. I shan’t attempt any half-baked philosophy as to why that would be so.

My favorite observations of the week was some green shoots coming up in one neighbor’s lawn and some little purple flowers in another. It IS spring! Yay!

And that is what I have for today. Lame and short. I hope you’re all having a lovely Friday.

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Ready to Cheer for The Psychic

Posted on March 21, 2015 by mohawkvalleygirl

A post on the run for this week’s Lame Post Friday. Steven and I are about to leave for a real theatre party. Regular readers will recall that I recently appeared in Busybody at Ilion Little Theatre, along with a stellar cast aided by an awesome director, sound/light guy and prompter. Well, life goes on at Ilion Little Theatre, and tonight is opening night of The Psychic.

The Psychic features one of the cast members of Busybody. At the Busybody cast party, we all declared that we would attend The Psychic en masse, to cheer on our friend. I wondered if it would be one of those things which we all said, “Yeah, let’s do that!” but it didn’t work out. It seems it is working out.

Not entirely, of course. Not everyone can make it. Some of us are meeting before the play for dinner, some of us are going out after for drinks and snacks, some of us may do both. I don’t think anybody told Andy (the cast member we are particularly going to cheer on) that we will be there.

And I should just mention, we are going to support the ENTIRE theatre group. We will clap for the whole cast. Just wanted to be clear on that.

Anyways, I’m too busy and flustered to write a real post now, and I will be too tired later. But I hope to write a killer post about the play. Stay tuned!

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I Daresay I Repeat Myself

Posted on March 14, 2015 by mohawkvalleygirl

I’ve got the dreaded Type It In Then Backspace Over It disease. I think I have started blog posts with that line or something similar before. However, this is the third time I’ve tried to begin this post, I have backspaced over two beginnings so far, it is almost 8 p.m. and I want to get on with my Friday.

I’ve done three things since work which have previously provided perfectly acceptable blog posts: I went running, I tasted wine at a Valley Wine and Liquors, and I got my hair cut at Hot Spot Salon and Spa. Partway through my run I realized I could not write a running commentary. All I could think about was my wet feet. Two running commentaries in one week is OK. Two running commentaries about wet feet is whiny and not very interesting.

I had a vague thought that I could do a silly post about getting dressed for my hair appointment. I’ve written about my wardrobe tribulations before with some success (or do I flatter myself?). Then I didn’t really feel like writing about me being fat and not having many clothes.

Wine tasting is often good for a post. When I remember my wine tasting notebook and take notes about the wines I taste. I actually started to write about my haircut. Couldn’t quite get the lead.

Then again it is Lame Post Friday. What could be more lame than a post about Why I Can’t Write a Post Today? Hope to see you all on Saturday.

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Now We Know Why I’m Not on the Best Seller List

Posted on March 7, 2015 by mohawkvalleygirl

Lame Post Friday follows Non-Sequitur Thursday as surely as night follows day. I can’t say as surely “as spring follows winter” because many of us here in the Mohawk Valley are wondering when spring will come if ever. Oh, I know winter won’t last forever. I’m just afraid we will skip straight to summer. However, my purpose today is not to complain about the weather but to entertain with some random observations and half-baked philosophy.

And here is where I make a note to myself: when I see something worthy of being a random observation during the week I should WRITE IT DOWN. However, thinking of that makes me remember a bit of half-baked philosophy I can share. At least, I don’t know how philosophical it is. It is a hoary piece of writer advice you see everywhere, and I would like to address it.

Keep a notebook by your bed, the advice says. When you come up with a brilliant idea in the middle of the night — perhaps in a dream — you can make an immediate note of it. You will most likely not remember it in the morning. As far as that goes, it is true. I often wake up from a dream, think, “What a great novel that would make!” Then fall back asleep and forget it.

Once in a while, though, I do remember it. I’ve even been known to go so far as to write it down. Guess what? When I look at it in the morning, I find out that it ain’t so brilliant after all. When it makes sense at all. When I can read my own handwriting.

I suppose it is still good advice to write it down. After all, what if it really is brilliant? In that case I might like to remember it. So noted. In fact, I do sleep with a notebook and pen handy. Also, at least one book, a flashlight, my Bible, a handkerchief and a bottle of water (in case anybody was making comparisons with their own bedside).

However, all my life I have suffered from insomnia. The older I get, the more unhappy it makes me the next day. Therefore, I confess that I do not often waste time chasing down elusive writing ideas when to me the operative thing to do is to go back to sleep.

And now the operative thing to do is to go back to enjoying my Friday. I hope you are doing the same.

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But You Should Have Read That Post in My Head

Posted on February 28, 2015 by mohawkvalleygirl

So there I was trying to write a blog post when it suddenly became clear: what I composed in my head while I was working (it’s OK, it’s the kind of job I can daydream and do properly) does not necessarily translate through my pen and onto the paper.

Oh, there are the Know-It-Alls gearing up to say, “I could have told you that would happen. You can’t THINK about things before you write them, you have to just WRITE.” Blah, blah, blah. I think I know better than to listen to those yahoos by now. Yes, sometimes it is better to sit down at the page (or screen) tabula rasa as it were and see what comes out. Sometimes it helps to think about it first. How much thinking you ought to do varies.

That last sentence is the crux of the matter. The thing is, any piece of writerly advice — even wise, insightful advice (and any advice that begins with a sniff and “I could have told you that would happen” is probably neither wise nor insightful) — is only good some of the time. Every piece of writing is different. What works for one may be a disaster for another. Likewise, one writer’s Rosetta Stone is another writer’s brick wall (ooh, isn’t that a nice metaphor?) (now I’m remembering another piece of writerly advice: if you write something particularly fine, strike it out. I forget who said it).

Another thing about advice is: most people like to give it, few people like to take it. I don’t much like to listen to advice myself, especially if I haven’t asked for it. So anybody gearing up to offer advice on this blog post, NEVER MIND! Unless you’d like to leave a comment. I like when people leave comments. But if you comment with advice, I will probably not follow it.

In case anybody hasn’t noticed, today is Lame Post Friday.

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Or I Could Write a Better Blog Post

Posted on February 21, 2015 by mohawkvalleygirl

I feel less ill than I felt yesterday, yet more ill than I felt this morning. However, I am not making this post to whine about my ills (although, as I pointed out yesterday, a sorrow shared is a sorrow halved), but to tell the rest of the story I began yesterday. I think that will work for Lame Post Friday.

To re-cap for those just tuning in: I was at work. I was supposed to do laundry after work but had forgotten detergent and quarters. I called my husband Steven on my first break. I laid out what I saw as my options:

“I can go home, upset the dog, get the detergent and quarters, get a late start on the laundry. That would have the advantage that the detergent definitely would not be frozen.” With the weather we have been having lately, that is a concern. “Or, I can go to the ATM and get some money out.” After all, it was payday, there should be money in the bank. “Or, I can go to Wal-Mart, buy socks and underwear, and bag laundry till next week.”

“Do that,” Steven said. Do I have the world’s best husband or what?

I called my house a few hours later, leaving a message I hoped Steven would get on his lunch break. I told him I was going straight home and to bed after work. I would go commando and find some socks somewhere for Friday. It’s not that I need to inform my husband of my every move. Only I was sure he expected me to stop by his place of employment and say hi after I had purchased the underwear.

I hope none of my followers are hitting the “stop following” button because I’ve been talking about my underwear. This isn’t usually that sort of a blog. I’m sure I’ll feel better tomorrow and write a nice blog post. Happy Friday, everyone.

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Better to Have Lame and Lost?

Posted on February 14, 2015 by mohawkvalleygirl

Lame Post Friday is meant to be lame. Don’t hate, don’t judge.

I spent my breaks at work today writing my play (the one I mentioned yesterday). I went back to work with a glowing feeling of I LOVE TO WRITE. What are those writers thinking, the ones who say, “Oh, I hate to write but I love to have written.” Yeah, yeah, to have written is nice, but I LOVE TO WRITE (sorry, must put it all in caps).

Of course some days I love it more than others. Which makes me think of running. I love to run. I love the physical act, I love looking around at the scenery while I do it, I love the way it makes me feel. Most of the time. Other times, I do not feel good when I do it AT ALL. Those are the days when at least I am glad to have run. In other words, I shall not judge the other writers (nor hate on them; see first paragraph).

It is beastly cold in the Mohawk Valley today. I think I have written other posts about my brain freezing up when it is very cold. Much like it melts in extreme heat. This Mohawk Valley Girl requires moderate temperatures in which to write, or at least in which to write anything good.

Which, I suppose, explains this blog post. All I can do is say again, don’t hate, don’t judge. Hope to see you on Scattered Saturday.

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I Say: Better than Whiskey

Posted on February 7, 2015 by mohawkvalleygirl

OK, so we’re all agreed that it’s all right if I do foolish posts till the play is over on Sunday. Um, I may also need Monday to recover from the cast party. In any case, today is Lame Post Friday, so we knew I wouldn’t be sweating it too much if today is, well, lame.

I had hoped for a marginally non-lame post. I thought I might do a minor preview of coming attractions, especially since I am planning to have at least one Mohawk Valley adventure tomorrow before the play. This quickly became a source of stress to me when I realized that although I plan to have an adventure, I do not actually have an adventure planned. How about a little half-baked philosophy about that?

Sometimes the best adventures are unplanned. I can’t think of an example offhand, but I’m sure that is a well-known contention, beloved by many. Or is it just a rationalization for people who have not planned? How many times have you said, “Well, that was an adventure,” just to make yourself feel better? Oh, I suppose YOU never did (you know who you are). I’m not talking to you.

And here is another half-baked philosophical question: Why are some people so down on rationalizations when sometimes they make you feel so much better? Aren’t mental gymnastics better than drugs? Shall I rationalize that faux pas or just have a shot of whiskey? MMmmm… whiskey. Better not have any of that before tonight’s performance.

For local readers I will just repeat: it’s Busybody at Ilion Little Theatre, Ilion, NY. Click on the link for more information (I was so proud of myself when I learned how to make a link). And happy Friday, everyone.

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Break a Lame

Posted on January 31, 2015 by mohawkvalleygirl

I did say I might post late (and lame) so I could write about how the play went. Full disclosure: that isn’t the only reason. I was just too flustered earlier to write. I was pretty sure the play would go well. After all, the script is strong, the cast is talented, and everybody has been working hard. Still, one can’t help but be nervous.

At work today a friend was keeping a count for me. He started about twenty minutes to eleven.

“Nine hours and 18 minutes till curtain,” he said.

Luckily our work spaces are not all that close, so I didn’t get the update every few minutes. I did not need any help getting butterflies in my stomach. All I could do to counter it was continue to look over my lines (while on break) and think about my character (which I am capable of doing while I accomplish my job).

Briefly, then, the play went great. The audience laughed a lot. I confess, there were some mistakes and dropped lines. However, everybody helped everybody else and the performance ran smoothly. I don’t know why I still feel flustered. Perhaps because I have five more performances to get through.

Still, the first performance is out of the way and went well. I am looking forward to doing it again. And eventually to finding something other than the play to write about.

Just to reiterate, the play is Busybody at Ilion Little Theatre, 13 Remington Ave, Ilion, NY, Jan. 31, Feb. 1, 6, 7 and 8, 8 p.m. Friday and Saturdays, 2 p.m. Sundays. For more information visit www.ilionlittletheatre.org, or Like Ilion Little Theatre Club on Facebook.

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Brevity is the Soul of Lame

Posted on January 24, 2015 by mohawkvalleygirl

The Law of Inertia applies to writing. To those who do not remember 8th grade Physics (I think my school just called it “Science”) (and I’m pretty sure 8th grade is when I learned this, although I could be wrong), the Law of Inertia states that an object at rest tends to remain at rest while an object in motion tends to remain in motion until worked on by an outside force.

A writer not writing tends to continue not writing. Or in my case, a blogger who spends several days composing last minute foolishness at the keyboard tends not to handwrite in her notebook during breaks at work.

That is what I handwrote in my notebook earlier today during a break at work (my computer is underlining “handwrite” and “handwrote” but I am going to pretend that they are words). You see, I knew it was Lame Post Friday, when it will not matter (per my own self-imposed rules) (which you may have noticed are subject to change) if I go the Foolishness at the Keyboard route. But yet, I wanted something more. After all, in the past I have written my lame post prior to typing it in. Now I anm trying to remember one so I can one make one of those pingback thing. Hmmm, nothing is coming. Well, you know what I mean.

What happened was, I wrote those two paragraphs then felt guilty for not studying my lines. You know, for that play I’m in. Also, it cannot be denied, looking at words somebody else wrote is much easier than coming up with words of my own. However, difficult though it sometimes is, I LIKE coming up with words of my own. This post is now over 250 of them.

250 words is not a long post. I’ve been reading other blogs and I know many run longer. However, they say brevity is the soul of wit. And it you can’t be witty, it is best to be brief. There, that covers me either way. Happy Friday, everyone.

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