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Category Archives: Why I Cant Write a Post

My Brain Would Die

I am sitting here hoping to make my Saturday blog post  but keep hiccuping. I think I have finally stopped.   Phew! I am watching Attack of the Killer Shrews and thinking this could be a good topic for a blog post.  I have written about this cheesy movie before.

That was as far as I got on Saturday.  I never finished the movie but am now watching The Brain That Wouldn’t Die, my all-time cheesy favorite.  I have had a dreadful headache since the middle of last night, but it seems to be easing somewhat.  Just to add a complaint.  My sister Vicki says the more you complain, the longer God lets you live.

The sound of one hand clapping?

I can’t find any pictures of the Brain herself, or Jan in a Pan, as some call her.  There are some blank spots in my Media Library.  What’s that all about?

And Jan thinks she is more horrible than this?

Jan just said, “Like all quantities, horror has its ultimate, and I am it.”  I respectfully beg to differ, but I guess we can agree to disagree.

By now it should be quite clear that I got nuthin’, and this is yet another post about not making a blog post.  As usual, I conclude that a bad blog post is better than none at all.  Once again, thank you for tuning in.

Perhaps I’ll try Attack of the Killer Shrews again next.

 

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I Entertain a Blog Post

How about a Post-Rehearsal Post? I would normally end that sentence with a period not a question mark, since I intend to go ahead and make the post anyways. However, this evening I entertain doubts of my ability to do so.

By the way, “entertain doubts” is one of my favorite expressions. When you entertain doubts, how do you do it? Do you invite them into your parlor and serve tea? Or do you do a little song and dance, maybe some stand-up comedy? I lean towards the latter, being a theatre geek, but the idea of treating doubts as my honored guest also has its appeal.

But I digress.

I am doubting my ability to make a blog post, because I have a whanging headache (no, autocorrect, I do not mean a changing headache; I wish it would change!). I started to get it at rehearsal, as the sun seemed to set right into my eyes. It was even worse on the ride home. Kim was driving, so I must count my blessings. I took a couple extra strength acetaminophens when I got home, so that is another blessing I can count.

So this is my blog post. I can bill it as a Tired Tuesday or a Blogger’s Sick Day, but I guess it is really yet another Post About Why I Can’t Make a Blog Post. Once again, thank you for tuning in.

Blame it on the Boilermaker

Yesterday I sat down to write a post about Why I Can’t Write a Post Today and then came up with a serviceable Running Commentary.  Today I don’t think that’s going to work out.  I don’t think my brain is in particularly serviceable shape today.  That is OK, though, because it is Wrist to Forehead Sunday.

In Utica, NY, it is also Boilermaker Sunday.  I ran in the Boilermaker 15K last year.  I vowed I would never run it again, but I don’t think anybody believed me.  Sure enough, what I feared would happen came to pass.  As I saw and heard all the hoopla surrounding the race as it approached, I felt sorry I was not part of it.  Today when Facebook friends posted pictures and statuses about it, I commented on them that I would run it next year.  Will I follow through?  Quite possibly I will.

Steven, Spunky and I have been having a pleasant lazy Sunday.  It has been raining on and off, but I managed a pretty good run this morning and we have taken a couple of short walks.  The main event of the day has been movies, although I fear we spent almost as much time discussing what we wanted to watch as we have spent watching them.  I also made quite a tasty dinner.

And yet it really is a Wrist to Forehead Sunday.  I’m glad I ran this morning, or else I fear I would be swooning on the sofa or reaching for my smelling salts (I actually don’t have any smelling salts, do you suppose regular salt would work?).  Is it really angst that I did not participate in the country’s premiere 15K?  Or is it sorrow that the only thing I can write is how I can’t write today?  Or is it a mere desire to be dramatic?  Hmm… I bet that’s it.  Hope to see you all on Middle-aged Musings Monday.

 

Slacker Saturday

Welcome to a new feature here at Mohawk Valley Girl: Slacker Saturday.  When you haven’t done enough to warrant a Scattered Saturday post, you didn’t write a post earlier and you just can’t wait to make your post and declare it wine o’clock. Oh, who am I kidding?  I don’t have to wait till after I post to have a glass of wine.  We’ve talked about sipping and typing before.  It is acceptable behavior among bloggers and a daily routine for some (um, I don’t do it daily.  Do you suppose I ought to?).

I worked today.  Although I was able to sleep until 3:30 instead of my usual 3:00, I’m tired.  I tried to take a nap earlier but without success.  I had a number of projects I thought I might work on, but all I wanted to do was sit on the couch and stare into space.  Naturally I stared at Facebook for a while instead.

I did spend a little time folding laundry.  Talk about a task of Sisyphus (ooh, I just figured out how to spell Sisyphus; yay me)!  Of course I love having a washer and drier in my house, but ever since I stopped going to the laundromat, I never have all my clothes clean at once!  I just can’t get to the bottom of the pile one load at a time.  I keep thinking, if I do one load every day, I will get caught up.  I can do that for maybe two days in a row.  Then if you don’t fold one load, you naturally don’t fold the next, and then you don’t want to wash another load till you fold everything you’ve washed so far.  Then sometimes you wear something out of the pile and think, “Ha, ha, don’t have to fold that one!”  Or is that just me?

One thing I did after much dithering was begin to learn my lines for Much Ado About Nothing (remember, with LiFT Theatre Company; I’m the Friar).  I had a bit of a sticky wicket when I could not find my Complete Works of Shakespeare. What’s that all about? It’s a giant yellow book, how do I lose it?  It takes a talent, I suppose.  If only I could use my powers for good.  When I lamented my loss on Facebook a kind friend offered me some Shakespeare books she doesn’t want any more (duplicates, I believe).  Another friend shared a link to all the plays.  I hope to get the books from the first friend soon (greatly prefer paper; I’m old), but in them meantime, I checked out the link, found my scenes and started studying.  Oh, how I love being in a play.

I almost forgot to mention:  I worked on my banana play while on break at work (I only got one today).  I think it is going rather well.

And look at this, I am over 500 words for one of my silly posts.  I think that deserves a toast.  Hope to see you all on Wrist to Forehead Sunday.

 

Cluttering Up the Blogosphere

I am experiencing a definite Writer’s Block this afternoon.  It is Memorial Day.  I went for a run this morning during which I had some definite thoughts about what I would write in a blog post today.  Now I feel that (a) I am not going to say it right if I try and (b) it probably wasn’t that good of a thing to write about anyways.   But isn’t this always the way with me?  I have nothing wise or profound to say.  I’ll only clutter up the blogosphere.

Now that I say that I begin to have a complete crisis of confidence and think that clutter up the blogosphere is all I do anyways.    Then I say to myself, “Oh, quit fishing for compliments.”  That is kind of what we are doing when we share our crises of confidence.  We seek positive re-enforcement.  Sometimes a voice outside oneself is easier to believe, especially when it is something positive.

Oh dear, this is not the post I started out to write.  I only wanted one of my usual Why I Can’t Write a Post Today posts.  I didn’t mean to get into any of these sticky self-esteem issues.  I’ll stop that right now.  The fact that I hit Publish every day argues that I have some modicum of self-confidence at least.  As for cluttering up the blogosphere (you know, I really like that phrase), I remind myself that there is a lot of room on the internet.  There is room for profundity and there is room for foolishness.  As I always say, go with your strengths.

 

More Tired than ‘Tude

My original plan for today was to write a Bad Attituesday post AND a movie commentary post (can’t really call what I write a review) while on breaks at work today.  Then I would type both posts in and not have to worry about a post tomorrow, when Steven and I have a program to attend at the Herkimer County Historical Society (preview of coming attractions).  My real plan was to avoid running again today while allowing time to do so tomorrow.

Why do I even bother making a plan?  It never works out for me.

I had no ideas for a Bad Attituesday post, so I tried my hand at the movie commentary  I wrote quite a bit on it, in spite of being somewhat mortified to realize I had not paid much attention to the movie in question.  It was running into some length and I had not finished.  Still, I did not despair.  I could come up with an ending, sure I could.  Something would come to me as I typed it in.

As the day progressed, I thought to myself, why not run?  Why not run in place on the mini-tramp for bouts of ten minutes or so, interspersing this with push-ups, crunches, flutter kicks, etc.?  What a great idea!  Especially if it rained, which was beginning to look possible.  I could still type in the movie post.  I didn’t have to do a Running Commentary two days in a row.

The rain held off, so I ended up running outdoors, taking a different path from yesterday and running for a whole minute longer.  I ran slow, even for me.  It did not feel as good as yesterday.  I persevered.  When I walked my cool-down, my legs felt sore, but it was the good sore of having just worked out.  I felt reasonably content, but still not inclined to write a Running Commentary.

Anyways, I had to cook supper first.  Well, not really “had to.”  Steven works till 6:30, so it would be quite acceptable to grab something easy and let him do the same.  This might even be preferable, because I don’t want to wait till 6:30 to eat and if I don’t Steven will have to reheat whatever I fixed.  But I really wanted to use some leftovers, I had what sounded like a pretty good plan to me, and I could always take any leftover leftovers for my lunch tomorrow.

I know, I know,  I could have just done a cooking post.  I could not have PLANNED to do a cooking post, since I was not sure till I was actually taking the cast iron frying pan out of the cupboard that I was going to cook.  But I can write that sort of thing on the fly.  I’ve done it before (I know, I’m doing it now, but this isn’t a “real” post, as you can tell).

Does the phrase Tired Tuesday mean anything to you?

Well, it means something to me.  It means I am leaving the — Good God — THREE pages of movie commentary untyped for now.  I shall look forward to finishing it.  In the meantime, I’m going to think of a silly title for this piece of foolishness, hit publish, and relax with my crochet and a true crime show on cable television.  Happy Tuesday, everyone.

 

At Least I’m Writing SOMETHING

Welcome to another Wuss-out Wednesday.  I was busily writing while at work today (before my shift and on breaks, as usual), but not on a blog post.  I started a new novel.  Oh, it is so fun to start a new novel!  New ideas just appear in my head and I write them down.  I feel brilliant.

 

I’m writing this novel a little differently from how I’ve attempted previous novels.  I started writing a list of potential names, then I just dove right in and started writing.  No notes.  No outline.   All I have, other than the pages of novel, is a growing list of characters, so I don’t use any names that are too similar (so annoying to the reader, I know it drives me crazy).

 

Of course it is the wrong thing to do, to begin a new novel.  I VOWED I would finish the last one I started.  You see, I have many, many novels started and only one I ever finished.  And that one’s not very good.  My later novels are better, but they are not finished.  It is mortifying to admit this, but it is true.

 

However, my latest unfinished novel (I mean the one before the one I just started) was at a STANDSTILL.  I simply could not progress.   I had to take a step back and I just couldn’t bear to not be writing.  Sometimes I can only write what comes out of my pen.

 

In case anybody is wondering, I am still working on the play about bananas.  I’m writing on that every night before bed.  Yesterday I wrote a speech from the play within the play (I just can’t write anything that is not complicated, I suppose).

 

So that is my story about why I did not write a blog post today.  Tomorrow I will try to find a little more time to write an actual post.  But since tomorrow is Non-Sequitur Thursday, I make no promises.

 

I Daresay I Repeat Myself

I’ve got the dreaded Type It In Then Backspace Over It disease. I think I have started blog posts with that line or something similar before. However, this is the third time I’ve tried to begin this post, I have backspaced over two beginnings so far, it is almost 8 p.m. and I want to get on with my Friday.

I’ve done three things since work which have previously provided perfectly acceptable blog posts: I went running, I tasted wine at a Valley Wine and Liquors, and I got my hair cut at Hot Spot Salon and Spa. Partway through my run I realized I could not write a running commentary. All I could think about was my wet feet. Two running commentaries in one week is OK. Two running commentaries about wet feet is whiny and not very interesting.

I had a vague thought that I could do a silly post about getting dressed for my hair appointment. I’ve written about my wardrobe tribulations before with some success (or do I flatter myself?). Then I didn’t really feel like writing about me being fat and not having many clothes.

Wine tasting is often good for a post. When I remember my wine tasting notebook and take notes about the wines I taste. I actually started to write about my haircut. Couldn’t quite get the lead.

Then again it is Lame Post Friday. What could be more lame than a post about Why I Can’t Write a Post Today? Hope to see you all on Saturday.

Another Non-Sequitur Thursday

When I left for work this morning I did NOT bring the puzzle book which was part of my downfall the other day. I was going to WRITE on my breaks. I did bring a printout of the article I was working on for Mohawk Valley Living. I thought I could work on it.

I got to work early enough to write. I looked over the article. Marked out how I wanted to rearrange the paragraphs. Added a sentence or two. Made a couple of notes of things to look up further. This was great. I felt like a real magazine writer.

It was time to begin work before I got much else done. At my nine o’clock break, I thought I might work on a blog post. Couldn’t think of anything. I’d written a bunch of notes on my novel (currently at something of a standstill) but felt I could add nothing to them. My play was in the other notebook.

That play. I’m going to be seeing the fellow I’m writing it for next week. And I don’t think it is very good. I think I have some major plot problems. I began writing a synopsis of the plot, so as to get a better handle on what I had going on. I continued the synopsis during my lunch break (pausing to call and talk to my husband, obviously a very important thing to do). I think it is very complicated.

When I got home, I got to work on stuff to submit to Mohawk Valley Living, the deadline for which is tomorrow. I finished my article. I took two previous blog posts and edited them for submission. This, I might add, was a long and complicated process, given my old and infirm desktop computer (I’m composing this on the acer). May I just add, the comfortable feeling of being a real magazine writer did not last.

All this by way of saying, I’m too tired to also write a blog post. However, if my dearest husband can help me come up with a catchy title, we can call this another Non-Sequitur Thursday.

At Least I Got My Plot

It’s all about the bananas.

I mostly said that to get your attention. I had been about to lead off with how I did not write today’s post while at work (yes, yes, on breaks), because I was writing a play. I thought it might be fun to tell you why I am writing a play.

In the play I was just in at Ilion Little Theatre (yes, still talking about that), we had a lot of laughs. One cast member was especially determined to be silly, Andy Vogel, who portrayed Constable Goddard (I feel free to use his name, because it appeared in the newspaper and on the program after all). During one rehearsal, I, or rather my character, turned around to say something to Goddard, and there was Andy, eating a banana.

“Why were you eating a banana?” I asked him after the rehearsal.

“I thought it would be funny.”

OK, it was funny. I don’t mind an occasional joke of that nature during the rehearsal process. It can break up tension or help you practice concentration. During performance? Oh hell no! I lived in fear. Then I had an idea. I told Andy if he pulled no shenanigans during performances, I would write a play for him with lots of bananas. He was delighted at the notion.

So that is what I am doing. At first I confess I spent hours looking for an idea. I would get one, realize it did not quite fit my needs, get another one, not like it at all… you know how it goes.

To tell you more would give away more of the plot than I want to talk about at this point. If a writer talks too much about what she is writing, sometimes she doesn’t want to write it any more. In fact, already I’ve said too much.

In any case, that is my post about Why I Did Not Write a Post Today. For a Non-Sequitur Thursday, I think it will do.