Category Archives: movies

One of the presents I got Steven for his recent birthday was a DVD set of 50 Horror Classics. The years run from 1922 to 1963 and the quality from classic (Nosferatu) to cheesey (keep reading), so I thought, what’s not to like? Last weekend we watched a couple of the movies, so not having a better topic (I’m still suffering from a bad cold), I thought I’d do another monster movie post.

First we watched The Giant Gila Monster (1959). This sparked a short debate on how Gila is pronounced. We agreed the “i” sounds like “ee” (as in EEEeeee!), but is the g a “g” or an “h”? The movie did not settle the question, thought, because I don’t recall any characters actually saying the word “gila.”

I’m not saying nobody said the word; I’m saying I didn’t hear it. In other words, this was not a movie that gripped my attention. It started out fast enough, with a couple in a car (love the classic cars in these movies) overcome by an unseen horror (this sort of scene was a precursor, I’m convinced, to those doomed copulating couples in the slasher flicks from the ’70s and ’80s). After that, though, the movie slowed down. It even paused not once but twice so the main guy could sing this touching song about laughter. I don’t know if they were trying to get that guy a singing career, create suspense or just fill in time. Guess which one they accomplished (I knew you’d guess).

Our second feature was The Beast of Yucca Flats(1961) featuring Tor Johnson, who got his start as an actor courtesy of Ed Wood. That is according to the Tim Burton movie Ed Wood. We’ve seen Tor Johnson in the Wood-directed opus, Plan 9 From Outer Space. Incidentally, Plan 9 is widely credited as the Worse Movie Ever Made. I think a better award would be Best Bad Movie. I can sit through Plan 9 From Outer Space and be reasonable entertained. Other bad movies, not so much. This bad movie committed the unforgivable movie sin of being dull.

Both movies earned my favorite pan for a dull movie, “It needed robot heads.” This, of course, is a reference to Mystery Science Theatre 3000 (if you didn’t get the reference, I don’t know if we can still be friends) (just kidding; I need all the friends I can get, but seriously, try to catch MST3000). Why isn’t that show somewhere on digital cable?

Just in case anyone’s forgotten (unlikely) or never knew (a sad state), in MST 3000, this guy and two robots watched cheesey movies and made silly comments. I know, this is something many of us have been doing for years in our own living rooms, but these guys were inspired.

I’m thinking the DVD set has many other entries in need of robot heads. I’ll watch them all and feel free to post on them when nothing better is available.

I wanted to write a blog post comparing the Daphne Dumaurier short story “The Birds” with the Alfred Hitchcock movie (regarding a recent post in which I was delighted to purchase the book containing the short story). However, I wanted to view the movie again so it would be fresh in my mind. Unfortunately, we had already made up our minds to watch a different monster movie Saturday: Lake Placid.

Lake Placid got no critic love and little box office love when it was in theatres, but Steven and I think it is fun. We first encountered it on commercial television one lazy Sunday afternoon in Georgia. What could be lazier than watching a cheesy horror movie on commercial television on a Sunday afternoon? We subsequently rented it, so we could see whatever bits got cut for commercial breaks, and Steven got me the DVD for Christmas last year.

One reason we wanted to watch it Saturday was that Betty White had recently celebrated a birthday. We like to watch a movie featuring a birthday girl or boy.

Betty White is pretty fun in the movie, doing her usual sweet but twisted old lady schtick. I must say, however, that giving Betty White a potty mouth is a cheap, obvious way to get a laugh. Still, it’s Betty White. There could be no possible objection.

The movie is worth watching for the non-Betty White parts as well. In case you are not familiar with the movie, it concerns a large crocodile terrorizing a peaceful lake in Maine. We were interested to see the movie at first because we used to live near Lake Placid, NY. We were hoping the movie took place there. Actually, on this viewing, I found out that the Maine lake in the movie is Black Lake.

“They wanted to call in Lake Placid,” the big bellied sheriff says, “but that name was taken.”

How in the world did I not remember that line?

Bill Pullman plays the calm, cool Fish and Wildlife guy who is in charge of the investigation. Bridget Fonda is a city girl paleontologist with reasons of her own for wanting to stick around. Oliver Platt shows up as a spoiled rich diletantish crocodile lover who clashes (of course) with the big bellied sheriff. The characters actually keep from being “types,” as often happens in these flicks. I especially liked the big bellied sheriff (his belly isn’t really all that big, I just like referring to him as the big bellied sheriff).

I enjoyed the easy to watch monster movie after my Agatha Christie afternoon (see previous blog post). I’m penciling in The Birds for this weekend. Stay tuned!

Saturday I did not do anything remotely Mohawk Valley-ish, as I like to call my various adventures. Still, I was in the Mohawk Valley at the time, so I will tell you how I spent a good part of the day on my couch, crocheting and watching Agatha Christie movies.

I started with And Then There Were None. I was recently in a stage production of this with Ilion Little Theatre. It was during my pre-blog days. The script is based on a book which is also called 10 Little Indians. I think And Then There Were None is clearly a better title.

The reason it was called 10 Little Indians (or something even less politically correct) is that the murders are based on a supposedly charming nursery rhyme. Seriously, in the play the characters find these Indian figurines and a wall hanging of a poem about how each little Indian bit the big one and they say, “Oh, how charming!” This one chokes himself, that one chops himself in half and the last one hangs himself. They sure don’t make nursery rhymes like they used to. Still, it was a fun movie to watch, especially after being in the play. Naturally, I liked our version better, but Hollywood tries.

I followed the movie up with Murder on the Orient Express. The book was called Murder on the Calais Coach. Again, I like the movie title better. Calais Coach has the alliterative thing going on, but Orient is mysterious and Express is urgent, a more evocative combination (evocative is one of my favorite words).

We’ve had the second movie for years, first as a video Steven purchased for seventy-five cents from a rental place going out of business, then eventually as a DVD. I love the star studded cast, especially Albert Finney as Hercule Poirot. I don’t think this one was ever written as a stage play, which is too bad. I’d suggest it to Ilion Little Theatre.

I enjoyed my movie watching afternoon and managed to complete an afghan. I’ll make plans to do something a little more blogworthy soon.

I thought it was time to stop writing posts about Christmas, but nobody said anything about New Year’s.

It would be nice to report that I did something really exciting, maybe involving a noted Mohawk Valley landmark or establishment. Alas, no. My husband had to work New Year’s Eve and New Year’s Day, so we planned a quiet evening at home. Left to my own devices during the day of New Year’s Eve, I did not do much but take the dog for a couple of walks. They were long walks and we enjoyed them, but nothing of particular note happened.

When Steven got home, we commenced the movie watching portion of the evening, usually our favorite part. We watched two New Year’s Eve movies: Sunset Boulevard and Mystery of the Wax Museum.

A note about how I categorize movies might be in order here. I call a movie a Christmas movie if the movie takes place on Christmas (Die Hard), has a scene or two during Christmas (LA Confidential), or even mentions Christmas (Almost Famous). The same rule applies for New Year’s. Also, since many of our New Year’s Eves have been spent watching movies, I have designated a few other movies New Year’s Movies, just for the sake of argument. Sunset Boulevard and Mystery of the Wax Museum are in the former category. In case anyone wants to know, the latter category includes Murder By Death, Sleepy Hollow (also known in our house as The Headless Everybody), and any Marx Brothers movie.

Sunset Boulevard is a delightful piece of Gothic art. Not a love letter to Hollywood, not exactly a poison pen letter… I’ll call it a love/hate letter. Gloria Swanson is wonderful as an aging silent film star who cannot accept the passage of time. Swanson was, of course, a silent film star, but from anything I’ve read about her, she aged gracefully, vibrantly and with an eye always on what she would do next. A pivotal event happens on New Year’s Eve. William Holden attends two very different parties: an elegant, surreal soiree for two, and a crowded, boisterous gathering of young folks. I can’t quite decide which I’d rather be at (not that anybody’s invited me to either kind, so I’m not too worried about it).

Mystery of the Wax Museum stars Fay Wray of King Kong fame. She gets to play a girl with a lot more character and spunk this time out. The movie opens New Year’s Eve 1933 and Wray’s job as a reporter is on the line if she can’t bring in a story. While chasing the story of a stolen corpse, Wray stumbles upon greater crime and terror. The movie was remade as House of Wax with Vincent Price in 1953, but without the Wray character and with no New Year’s connection.

After the movies, we peeked at the World’s Dumbest marathon on TruTV, then went to bed shortly after our midnight smooch. And now it’s 2012, and I have a whole year ahead of me for Mohawk Valley adventures.