Tag Archives: lame post

In My Defense… I Have No Defense

Posted on November 9, 2012 by mohawkvalleygirl

I was totally going to have a Wuss Out Wednesday yesterday. Then I recklessly told everyone at Curves that I was going to write about voting. True, none of those women read my blog and so would not know if I reneged. Still, it seemed a perfectly good blog topic with an expiration date. I went for it.

So now here I am on Thursday with no name for a stupid post (too late for Middle-aged Musings Monday, too early for Lame Post Friday) and no post other than the one I have written many times before (but with variations, or do I flatter myself?) about Why I Can’t Write a Blog Post Today.

I have the Overtime Blues at work. On the brighter side, this leads to the Payday Greens, which in turn helps Financial Condition Red. Just to use a little colorful language, which they say goes over well in the blogosphere.

With the Overtime Blues comes not much time and being too tired for Mohawk Valley adventures. Last night I attended a meeting of the Board of Directors for Ilion Little Theatre. Not so blogworthy. Tonight I have a pick-up rehearsal for Strike Story, followed on Friday and Saturday by performances of same. Blogworthy, but I’ve written about it before. What else can I say? Perhaps I will think of something for tomorrow, so my Friday post will not be lame.

I could blather on… who am I kidding? No I can’t. I am out of words about having no words. But I am over 250 words, which I consider sufficient to call it a post. I have to go find some black pantyhose for my play. Hope to see you Friday.

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Wrist to Forehead Sunday

Posted on October 22, 2012 by mohawkvalleygirl

This happens all the time. I promise Mohawk Valley adventures which I fail to deliver. Well, I did threaten to institute Wrist to Forehead Sunday in case of just such an emergency, so here goes.

So let’s see now, Middle-aged Musings Monday which sometimes becomes Mid-week Musings, Lame Post Friday, Running Commentary Saturday which I have not been able to deliver on for a couple of weeks now… Wait, didn’t I have something for Thursday? The Thursday Trudge, I think. Why don’t I just say this is a whole blog about how hard it is to write a blog and have done with?

I did have some Mohawk Valley adventures yesterday that I expect to write about eventually. We had breakfast at Heidelberg Bakery Cafe and visited the Ilion Farmer’s Market as well as Ilion Wine and Spirits. We’ve been watching cheesy movies for a good portion of today. I actually may not have to go lame again till Friday.

We took two walks with Tabby today. She is such a sweet, good dog. Inclined to stop and sniff a little too often, but she doesn’t hold a grudge when we insist she continue the walk before she’s ready to. It’s a cloudy day with a bit of a breeze but not too cold. The trees are becoming bare but you can still see some bright color. And there are ghosts, pumpkins, skeletons and spider webs on many porches. Plenty of entertainment with our exercise.

Did I mention that yesterday Steven and I celebrated 22 years of wedded bliss? Well, we did. He’s a pretty good husband, and I’m… well I can only do my best. Luckily this is not a marriage blog.

I see I am over 200 words of this nonsense. I recently received e-mails telling me I acquired two new subscribers. Why do I always do such a colossally stupid post right after I get new readers? They’re going to unsubscribe from me in a big fat hurry. Then I’ll have a reason to put my wrist to my forehead. Hope to see you Monday.

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Spare Me the Existential Post

Posted on October 20, 2012 by mohawkvalleygirl

So I don’t have much of a headache, and my back doesn’t feel too bad. Lame Post Friday ought to be a breeze.

Of course it’s not. You didn’t think it would be, did you? I wasn’t sure, myself. I thought it could go either way. Looks like it’s veering into Existential Writer’s Crisis. Nice.

Existential is one of those fancy words that people use to sound erudite that don’t really mean much. “Spare me the existential pose,” one character says to another in the movie Big Chill. He could just as well have said, “Spare me the pose,” or even, “Spare me” (I guess some people wish they had been spared the whole movie, although I like it).

Where was I? Ah yes, in crisis. Not much of one, really. My wrist is not on my forehead. It just looks as if I’m writing yet another post on Why I Can’t Write a Post.

And that was as much as I wrote at work today (on a break OF COURSE). I spent the rest of the afternoon wondering if some reader would post a condescending comment explaining to me the meaning of existential philosophy. I had my reply ready, “You sound very erudite.”

Still, as soon as you start thinking about the condescending things people might say to you, you tend to stop writing. At least many of us do (probably that condescending comment-poster does not have that problem) (you know who you are).

When I got home I looked up existential in not one but two dictionaries, to make sure it means what I think it means. I don’t believe in quoting the dictionary, so to give you the definition, I will quote a movie, The Ref, an awesome Christmas movie (although Steven categorizes it as Twisted Christmas). Kevin Spacey and Judy Davis are a married couple in therapy, which they seem to sorely need but which is not doing them much good. I may be paraphrasing:

Kevin Spacey: In the meantime, she never finishes anything she starts. Photography classes. Cooking classes. Existential philosophy courses.

Judy Davis: At least I go after my dreams!

Kevin Spacey: Do do what? To take pictures of Lutefisk to prove the nothingness of being?

Why can’t I write shit like that? (That’s from another movie: In Soapdish, writer Whoopi Goldberg says it when real life drama intrudes on the set.) Just when I thought my sidetrack into the meaning of existential was going to derail my crisis.

But, crisis or not, I see I am over 400 words, or if you don’t count my movie quotes, over 300 words. That’s a respectable Lame Post (as respectable as they get). Happy Friday, everyone!

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Saturday Evening Post

Posted on October 14, 2012 by mohawkvalleygirl

OK, I don’t have anything today except for that (I think) fabulous title, and it took me all day to come up with that.

As regular readers (I sure hope I still have some) know, I am hesitant to start running again, due to recent back problems, so Saturday Running Commentary was out. Fine, I thought, I’ll go for a walk. Tabby will like that.

And at first, she certainly seemed to. But two blocks in, she did her business and clearly indicated she was done walking, she wanted to go home.

I had some library books I had to return. We drove in the truck (no, there weren’t that many books that it needed a truck; I drive a truck). The library wasn’t open yet, so I put the books in the depository while Tabby waited for me in the truck. Nothing blogworthy there.

Back home, I started cleaning my house. That is, of course, startling and incredible news to those who know me. Blogworthy? Well, I did threaten to do a cleaning post, after several cooking posts once. Funny how cooking is so much more fun and creative than cleaning when they often get mentioned together as chores that couples ought to share (just a little half-baked philosophy; I don’t think my Friday Lame Post included any of that).

In desperation, I took a nap. Ever try to sleep when you’re desperate? OK, neither did I. I took a nap because I got up with Steven at 3:30, because he had to be in to work at 6, much like he often gets up with me at 3:30, because my overtime day starts at 5.

I thought, sleep, coffee, then I’ll write the blog post. Uh, and it looks like I did. Wait a minute, I’ve done this post before. “I had to write a post. But first I did this, then I did this, then I did this, then I wrote the post, and here it is.” That hoary fictional cliche, where the writer’s adventure turns out to be the movie or book we’ve just been watching or reading. I believe I even mentioned that cliche. I think it was last Friday’s Lame Post.

Oh well, what the hell, as a wise woman once said (it was my mother). At least this, this, and this that I did was different. Let’s call it a template for when I just can’t come up with anything. At any rate, Steven is home now. I’ll see if I can drag him on a Mohawk Valley adventure so I’ll have something better to blog about.

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Walk, Don’t Run

Posted on October 13, 2012 by mohawkvalleygirl

I was going to go running yesterday, because halfway through work I realized my back felt much better. I miss running! For one thing, I go further away from the house, so I see different scenery than when I take a walk with Tabby. For another thing, I’m gaining weight again. Say it ain’t so! If any more motivation is needed, it’s a built-in blog post.

On the other hand, for the past week my back has been really paining me. I mean, more so that your common or garden over-40 aches. I seriously considered going to the doctor and embarking upon a long struggle with addiction to prescription painkillers. Of course, there was no guarantee I could get in to see the doctor right away, and even less guarantee that he would prescribe anything beyond physical therapy and weight loss (say it ain’t so!).

While I dithered, I did some stretches I found in a Women’s Day magazine (April 2012) as well as a couple shown me by my mother and a woman at work. I know, this is not the same thing as working with a trained physical therapist who can ensure I am doing the appropriate moves with the proper form. Well, it fit my schedule and my budget for now.

And IT HELPED!!! I felt joyous. I knew I had sports bras clean. It had only been a week and one day since my last run. I could rock this! Then I thought, don’t be stupid. Your back just this minute stopped hurting, don’t instantly do something known to cause back strain. Still, running helps with the weight loss thing. I dithered a little more (I always say, go with your strengths).

Perhaps it was fortunate that my back started twinging again on the drive home. I thought a nice walk with Tabby would be more my speed. Tabby was agreeable. She didn’t want to go very far, either. Two blocks was all we did. I stretched some more later on.

Today at work, my friend who had shown me the one stretch brought me a copy of the physical therapy exercises she did when she was out for a month with back pain. I showed them to another co-worker and assured him I intended to do these exercises faithfully, “So you won’t have to listen to me complain about my aching back ANY MORE!”

He expressed skepticism. I explained that he would still have to listen to me complain about other things, and he believed that much.

I had actually meant to write a blog post about my two block walk with Tabby. When I sat down and put pen to paper, all this garbage about my back came out. I originally thought I might segue into an amusing description of the walk and edit out the back garbage later, but for some reason I never quite got to the amusing description. Then I thought, it’s Lame Post Friday! What could be more lame than two Fridays in a row complaining about my aches and pains? Stay tuned for more posts about Why I Can’t Write a Decent Post. Happy Friday, everyone!

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Best Lame Plans

Posted on September 29, 2012 by mohawkvalleygirl

It is not easy to write when you have a raging sinus headache.

My original plan was to write two posts on Thursday. Then Friday after work I would have only to hit “Publish,” and Steven and I could be off on our Mohawk Valley adventures.

Well, Thursday, I found out that it is not easy to write when you are dreadfully nauseous and laboring under strong emotions. Thursday’s post, in case you couldn’t tell, was composed at the computer with not a whole lot of time expended. Believe it or not, a great deal of thought was expended. It just didn’t seem to do me much good.

Fast forward to Friday (today) (oh, wouldn’t we Monday to Friday workers LOVE to be able to do just that). I was determined to write something that I could hurry home and just type in. After all, how hard could it be? It’s Lame Post Friday!

A little voice in my head is saying, “Cindy. Isn’t it time you stopped this obsession of posting every day? It was all very well for the first year, but now how many times a week are you craving people’s indulgence for another dumb post? Shouldn’t you be going for quality over quantity?”

To that voice I say, “Oh, do be quiet. Why can’t you say something interesting, like the voices in other people’s heads? Maybe something involving aliens and a tin foil hat.” I think I would look rather fetching in a tin foil hat. I wonder if it would do anything to alleviate the headache.

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Lame Attempts

Posted on August 11, 2012 by mohawkvalleygirl

So there I was at work, writing a blog post titled “Dithering over the DARE.” I am, of course, a past master of dithering. And then I didn’t like it.

I had intended to go running after work, despite the tremendous humidity, so I thought I might write about that. I even had a title picked out, “Oh, the Humidity.” You know, like that guy said, “Oh, the humanity!” during the Hindenberg disaster. Or is that being flippant about a tragedy? Could be, but I have several times seen and heard “Oh the humanity” used with ironic intent, so I think it is OK. But when I sat down at the computer, nothing.

I thought, “I can’t do ANOTHER post about not having anything to write about.” Then I thought, “Sure I can. It’s Lame Post Friday; I can do whatever I want.”

The reason I could not finish writing the first post is that I felt certain any number of people would tell me to stop being such a whiny baby or to quit rationalizing or some other rude, superior thing the people in my head can always come up with. I tend to spend a lot of time having imaginary conversations with people who criticize everything I do, say or think. In fact, as I write this, I can picture some snotty writer telling me I MUST silence the inner critic or I’ll NEVER be a writer. And somebody else telling me to quit complaining about it.

Huh. I bet neither one of them are published either.

And now I don’t like this post either. You know, I’m just not messing with it today. I’ll say something concrete instead: I was dithering about the DARE 5K because I have not been training as hard as I had intended to. Also, my running partner and cheering section have defected. After work today, I ran up the steep hill that is part of the DARE 5K course, in the steamy humidity. I made it, and the way back down was distinctly pleasant, what with gravity and the breeze picking up.

I think this has been the lamest Friday post yet. I don’t know whether to feel proud or sheepish. I’ll compromise on silly. See you Saturday.

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