Category Archives: commentary

Memory of Past Upsets

Posted on July 23, 2013 by mohawkvalleygirl

I was not going to write a Middle-aged Musings Monday this week. Then in going through my notebook looking for a blank back of a page, I came across something I wrote some months ago. I was upset (never mind about what) and could not write. As I often do, I wrote about how I could not write. It was not a usable post (some of my more sarcastic readers are shuddering at the thought there there is some stuff worse than what I actually publish) (you know who you are), except for a couple of paragraphs I share with you now:

Writing this out is not helping. That has almost always been the case for me. Some people swear by writing when they are upset. They get it all out of their system and feel better. I do not experience this effect. When I write about what is upsetting me, I usually get more upset. I see how completely justified I am in being upset. I wonder why I am not more upset. I marvel at my self-restraint in not killing the people that are making me upset.

One might think this is because I was such a persuasive writer. However, in my adolescent past, when I was ill-advised enough to show what I had written to the culprits causing the upset, it did not bring them to acknowledge the error of their ways. They actually refused to see the irrefutable logic of my position. Their self-delusion appalled me.

I rather liked those last two paragraphs. Then again, perhaps my self-delusion is not appalling others. No matter. It’s Monday. I deem that a short, silly post is acceptable. If anyone disagrees, well, that might upset me. But I probably won’t write a post about how upset I am.

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I Didn’t Wait Till Fall

Posted on July 20, 2013 by mohawkvalleygirl

So when I got out of bed this morning, knowing that I should run but that I did not want to, I heard thunder and said, “I’m off the hook!”

Halfway through my second cup of coffee I realized it had not thundered again, and I had no excuse. I hadn’t run in at least a week and was feeling rather bad about it. On the other hand, I have a fairly athletic cousin who does NOT run in the summer time, too hot. Couldn’t I follow his example and bag it till fall? Oh, how good would that feel, wait till the temperature cools off and the humidity is gone. Fall, my favorite season. I could start running again in the fall.

Yesterday was the last day of the hideous heat wave, according to certain weather reports. Today should be better, tomorrow better yet. Last night, in fact, brought some cooler temperatures. The fan in my window was not merely pushing around hot air. Phew! Still, it’s not fall. I could wait till fall.

However, as I sat playing solitaire and finishing my coffee, I started to sweat from the humidity. Now I wanted a shower. Well, I showered after four o’clock yesterday afternoon. If I was going to shower again this morning, I had better work up a better sweat than from just playing cards. I got on the running gear.

The temperature was a little better than expected. I had been afraid that waiting till after seven as I had, it might be getting hot already. I was soon feeling the effects of the humidity, though. Ugh. Well, one thing I know is how to persevere.

I struck out down German Street, my goal being the hill at Valley Health. A good enough hill after taking time off. I crossed the street, to avoid what I recalled as some egregious mud further down.

As I ran, I reflected that I had been telling myself I “should” run. Obviously that was silly of me. I’ve spoken about that before: as soon as you think you should do something, it is the last thing you want to do! I thought to myself, “I knew it was a good idea to go running.” In fact, I had said no such thing to myself earlier, and that no doubt explained my reluctance to wriggle into the sports bras. Now that I was out and doing it, I reflected that it was a good idea, and I was happy.

Then I saw some mud even more egregious than what I had crossed the street to avoid. After being really annoyed with myself for forgetting this stretch (after all, I knew that was where the flood had done some pretty extensive damage), I went out in the road to avoid it.

And realized I was NOT on the left side facing traffic. OH NO! That is one of my pet soap boxes. I bitch all the time about people walking and running in the road (often when there is a perfectly respectable sidewalk) in the same direction as cars, sometimes two or three abreast. Grrr! At least there was only one of me and not much traffic. Cross the street to maintain my integrity? Oh, it was less than half a block. I picked up the pace and got back on the sidewalk as soon as I could.

I’d been running a little over ten minutes when I remembered, I like to run. I was coated with sweat in an uncomfortable fashion and I was not running very fast, but dammit, I liked it! Who saw that coming? Not me!

I continued through the streets of Herkimer, feeling pretty good about myself. I almost slipped in some mud and landed on my butt, but avoided that disaster. I took short shuffly steps through the mud after that. Soon I came to a stretch of bare sidewalk and lengthened my pace.

Oh, I was going great! I achieved that loping stride the young folks seem to do with no effort. At least, in my head it was that stride. In reality it was probably only a little longer and faster than my usual middle-aged shuffle. But I enjoyed it.

I ended up running the same length of time as the last time I ran. Incidentally, it was over two weeks ago; I looked it up when I got back home. Tabby graciously walked my cool-down with me. As we walked, the most delicious cool breeze blew in my face. What a great start to my Saturday!

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Keeping It Lame

Posted on July 20, 2013 by mohawkvalleygirl

There are times when one certainly appreciates Lame Post Friday (one is me in this case). However, one must also admit (still me) that even on Lame Post Friday, one must write something.

One might think I had thoroughly hashed out the subject of How Stupid of a Post Still Counts as a Post (one is not me in this case). One might be right. On the other hand, I’m betting most of my readers don’t read every single post (but God bless you if you do!). On a third hand (using my foot as a hand?), perhaps I can think of something new to say.

Well, I think I did. Using a foot as a hand is not a silly joke I have made before. Perhaps some did not find it a particularly funny joke, but at least it had the charm of originality.

Oh, here’s some half-baked philosophy: what can you say when originality masquerades as talent? Another question: just because something has never been done before is that sufficient reason to do it?

I’m thinking right now of some current and recent movies (like in the last few years). Some movie makers are known for “pushing the envelope” (I might research where that expression came from for another post. I mean, what envelope? Just saying). Torture porn falls under this category, as do ultra violent films. I’m not saying none of these films have artistic merit (I don’t watch many movies from this century). I’m asking, does their entire merit consist in the fact that they have done something that has never been done before? Discuss amongst yourselves.

Well, that was a totally wimp out discussion. You may have noticed I did not mention any specific movies or in fact make a strong stance on the issue. I just brought up the question.

In my defense, the heat wave in the Mohawk Valley continues, and neither my place of employment nor my residence boast air conditioning. And anyone who is rolling their eyes and forming the words, “You think you’ve got it bad” or “I don’t want to hear it,” just give it a rest. My brain has been baked, steamed, boiled and stewed for five days now. This is all I got.

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Where’s Bill Murray When You Need Him?

Posted on July 18, 2013 by mohawkvalleygirl

OK, so I started to write a post this morning about how hot it is. I knew I had set a precedent for such a subject about a year ago with a post titled “I’m Me-elting” (I know how to make a ping-back to that, but I’m not sure it’s really worth a click) (although I did kind of like the last paragraph).

From that last parenthetical comment you see that I looked up the post. I had, in fact, just about decided not to use what I had written this morning but instead to make it a kind of a cooking post, telling about what I threw together for supper just now. Then I thought, oh what the hell, I’ll look at “I’m Me-elting” first, just to see what I said.

Well, I hadn’t said much about the heat but immediately went into a kind of a cooking post.

What is this, Groundhog Day?

So I’m going back to Plan A and write about the heat, making this another Wuss-Out Wednesday.

This year’s heat wave started just as I was dealing with my flooding woes (I’ll say it again: not as bad as some people’s, but bad enough to upset me!). I said to a friend at work, “I remember last year when the worst thing I had to deal with was how hot it was. Boy, those were the days!”

I thought about that for a minute then said, “Oh dear, do you suppose something worse is going to happen next year, so I’ll say, ‘Last year all I had to deal with was heat and a flooded basement. Boy, those were the days!'”

I live in fear.

Just kidding. I admit to sometimes trying to peer around that figurative bend in the road, to see what stupid thing is going to happen next. But that gets into half-baked philosophy, more suitable for Lame Post Friday. And I just thought of a silly headline that really makes today kind of like Non-Sequitur Thursday.

Incidentally, I thawed some shrimp, made cocktail sauce and cooked broccoli in the microwave. And served some black olives which happened to be in the refrigerator, by way of garnish. I include this information in case anybody is saying, “Gee, I wish she would have done the cooking post.”

I bet nobody was.

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Not Beaten, But Not Upbeat

Posted on July 16, 2013 by mohawkvalleygirl

My spell of bad writing days continues.

I was not able to write my post while at work today. I don’t feel able to write it now, either. I know other bloggers seem to like my silly posts about Why I Can’t Write a Post, but all I can think right now is, “My mother is going to read this!”

Ooh, didn’t that sound like I was going to write something racy? Sorry to disappoint (you know who you are).

The thing is, I bill this as a positive blog — “totally fun,” it says at the top. But one cannot be upbeat at all times. At least, I suppose one could, but not this one. And I bet the one that could gets on most people’s nerves. (Should I have put that last sentence in parentheses?)

I have not yet dried out from the flooding experienced recently by the Mohawk Valley. Of course I have a lot to be thankful for. I lost far less than others. I had help from family and friends. My basement is now in the process of drying out completely. My husband and I are in the process of cleaning out the mildew (yuck!). The hot water heater is on the way to being replaced, at which time the gas can be turned back on (warm showers and cooking on the stove! Woohoo!) (Ooh, that’s another thing to be thankful for: the electricity never got turned off).

It is, in fact, good weather to appreciate a cold shower. And who wants to heat up the kitchen by cooking on the stove anyways? I haven’t washed a pot or pan in two weeks!

Am I beginning to sound like the annoying one who is upbeat at all times? I didn’t think so, but it is good to check these things.

So I guess this is my Monday Middle-aged Musing for the week. I am well aware of many things I can be thankful for. Sometimes this knowledge does not bring about a corresponding rise in spirits. In other words, sometimes you just have to feel that way till you don’t feel that way any more.

And I hope tomorrow I will feel more like writing.

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Post-Flood Perambulation

Posted on July 12, 2013 by mohawkvalleygirl

I don’t know if I’ve mentioned that we are in the habit of referring to walks as perambulations, because most dogs know “the w word.” As I was writing this post in my head while I fixed dinner, I thought, “I’ll call it Wednesday Walk. Alliterative.”

And then I remembered today was Thursday. That’s what I get for cooking with wine. Or does that make this Non-Sequitur Thursday? No matter, Steven and I just took a walk with our schnoodle Tabby, and I’m going to write a post about it.

It was Steven’s idea to take a walk. Of course I always want to walk with our nice dog, but lately it’s been so stinking hot and humid. And it has rained just about every damn day (perhaps you’ve read some of my posts about the area flooding). Today was beautiful.

I had written most of a letter to my sister during work today. I suggested Steven add his two cents and we walk it to the post office. After a minor crisis looking for the stamps and some debate about appropriate footwear (are there still copious patches of mud from the flood?), we were off.

Sunny with a nice breeze. No mud to speak of, although we did encounter a few patches of dry dirt where bare sidewalk ought to be. Really, things are getting cleaned up nicely. For the past two weeks many houses have had sad piles of garbage next to the curb, the ruined contents of basements. Most of that has been hauled away.

We admired some flowers in flower boxes and on porches. Some front yard gardens were still blooming and beautiful. Some yards had not fared so well.

The breeze died down and the sun began to feel a little stronger. I encouraged Tabby to not stop and sniff while we were in the direct sunlight. I was more lenient in the shade. Steven pointed out that Tabby had not been for a walk in a few days; she was making the most of it.

We got the letter mailed then walked all the way up Main Street and down German to home. Herkimer is definitely looking better. Here’s hoping for better days to come!

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Musings After the Deluge

Posted on July 9, 2013 by mohawkvalleygirl

You see what I was trying to do there, that internal rhyme with the “oo” in “Musings” and the “oo” in “Deluge”? Oh well, my other idea for a title was “Hi Ho, Hi Ho,” because I went back to work today, but I felt certain somebody would say, “Who you callin’ a ho?”

Yes, after a Wrist to Forehead Sunday and a Saturday post about Why I Couldn’t Write a Post, I am indulging in another Middle-aged Musings Monday. I’ll have to get back to the murderer dumping bodies in the Seine (that I had been going to write about Saturday, for those of you just tuning in). Today I’m tired.

I had all last week off (regularly scheduled factory shut-down, not emergency flood-related leave). I spent a good part of the week saying things like, “It’ll be a relief to go back to work!” and “I can’t WAIT to be back at work!” And now, here I am at work, once again facing the fact that work is, you know, work.

It really isn’t so bad.

For one thing, it’s a lot more cut and dried what I’m supposed to do next at work (and after my flood experience, I REALLY appreciate the “dried” aspect of it). I admit to spending a ridiculous amount of time last week sitting in a daze or wandering from room to room, wondering what to do first.

In my defense, there were times when there wasn’t a whole lot I could do. Sometimes I just had to wait for the sump pump to do it’s thang (no, that’s not a typo; I meant to say “thang.” Is that too precious?).

I made my blog post every day, and I worked at least a little on my novel each day. I took my dog for several walks, which was not the relaxing activity it normally is. We had to pick our way around oceans of mud as well as avoiding the various clean up crews (who were doing a very good job, by the way). I went running twice and exercised at Curves twice.

So much for non-flood-related chores. I almost included going to the laundromat in that list, which I did once (and wrote a blog post about), because I didn’t wash things dirtied in the flood. However, since the flood made it impossible for me to do laundry at home, I deemed it flood-related.

Typing this post into the computer now, after work, exercise and a cold shower (haven’t replaced the hot water heater yet), I reflect that it was not a bad day at all. I got some sympathy from my co-workers about my lousy vacation. Some of them had pretty bad ones, too.

I will end with a musing which my husband, Steven, mused on Sunday, about the time he was holding a towel on the cracked pipe in the bathroom and I was frantically on the phone with the plumber. “What,” he asked, “did we do to deserve all this?” I believe that calls for some half-baked philosophy suitable for Lame Post Friday. It’s nice to have something to look forward to.

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Stopped by the Seine

Posted on July 7, 2013 by mohawkvalleygirl

So there I was, writing away at a post about a cheesy movie, when I began to write a sentence I had clearly written before. I completely remembered writing it. Those words were in my head, and I had put them there. Definitely. There was no way I could continue the sentence I was about to write next without using those very words again.

Why, you may argue, would that stop me? I repeat myself in this blog all the time, especially when I’m having any kind of trouble writing the damn thing. I argue back, in the first place, give me a break. In the second place, this sentence involved a murderer dumping a dead body into the Seine.

How many movies could that possibly have happened in? And how many of them could I possibly have seen recently? I was stopped cold.

Before I go on, a little background (another way to put this: in my defense). Earlier this week I experienced a flood. No, not as bad as other people have experienced (I’m also quite certain I’ve written about how there is always somebody who has worse problems than me), certainly not as bad as it could have been. But, still, a pretty bad experience.

I believe I mentioned briefly yesterday that some have believe I am handling it well. Oh, I am trying to. I really, really am. But at intervals, I suppose it’s bound to happen: not so much. I was having, as they say, a moment earlier today. Rather than write about it and look like I was making a colossal bid for sympathy, I decided to write about the cheesy movie I had viewed. Surely that was a good plan (and I’ll call you Shirley if I want to).

My first move, when I could move at all after coming to a complete standstill, was to go to the computer and search previous blog posts. Hmmmm… nothing that takes place in Paris, no place where I possibly could have mentioned the Seine.

After a couple of more distractions (when I have a moment, I really have a moment), I found the notebook I have been writing blog posts in for the past couple of weeks. On going through the whole thing (it’s not a big notebook), I found very few movie posts, none I did not remember, and no mention of the Seine. I sat and pondered.

At last I picked up the TV Journal. Oh. There it was. In a note I had made about the very movie I was attempting to write a post about. I tell you what, I felt so stupid about that, I almost had another moment.

But not quite, because I thought I could make a decent blog post about that silly writing crisis and then I would have two posts for the price of one. I ought to anyways, because I’ve taken a long enough time about this.

By the way, my moment is over. I’m back to handling things, if not exactly well (I’m not that competent), at least cheerfully and with a sense of humor. No need to make a colossal bid for sympathy. Thank you for bearing with me.

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Lame at the Laundromat

Posted on July 6, 2013 by mohawkvalleygirl

My real Mohawk Valley adventure on July 4 involved going to the Laundromat. I wrote the following while there, largely because I had neglected to bring a book to read. This being Lame Post Friday, I make bold to use it.

I have not been to the laundromat in years. Steven and I used to make quite an event out of it. We’d wait till we were wearing our bathing suits instead of underwear, load everything into the car (one more reason we drove a station wagon) and head out, usually on a weeknight. This was a good time to go in the North Country, where we used to live.

The most we ever filled was, I think, ten washers. It gives me a little giggle even now, thinking about it. Being me and Steve, we made silly jokes the whole time. I even started to write a song about it: The Dirty Clothes Blues.

With all this in mind, losing our washer and drier in the flood (um, they didn’t float away, they just got flooded) was the least of our worries.

“We’ll just go to the laundromat till we’re more beforehand with the world,” I declared.

“We used to have fun doing that,” Steven remembered.

So I had envisioned a fun if silly couple’s activity. However, what with mud and sweat, our clean clothes ran out faster than anticipated (and I don’t have a bathing suit any more). I put on my last pair of clean shorts and a sports bra and said, “I need to do laundry.”

Steven felt bad about not accompanying (he was working a double shift), but I made light of it.

“It’s the Fourth of July,” I said. “How many people are going to be doing laundry?”

Famous last words.

Steven helped me bring the baskets put to my vehicle. I had decided on a modest three loads. That is, all the dirty clothes that were NOT in the basement. Those are out on the back deck, awaiting a HOT washing or else a decent burial, as we will decide. The only sad thing was that our schnoodle, Tabby, saw us loading stuff into the car and immediately concluded that we were all going on a fun road trip. Imagine her disappointment. And mine.

A quick stop to pick up detergent (another casualty) and I was off to Ilion, NY, to the new laundromat there. At least, I can’t remember how new, but recent at least. I drive by it on my way to work and know it has a large number of machines.

The first thing I noticed was the number of cars in the parking lot. Well, that falls squarely under the heading Should Have Known. Weren’t basements flooded all over the Mohawk Valley? Didn’t many of those basements contain washers and driers? I found a parking space and hoped for the best.

And everything was fine. Like I said, large number of machines. I had a moment of sticker shock when I saw the washer said $5.50 as the price. I felt better when I realized that sucker could hold two of my baskets. Then I saw smaller washers that were only $2.50. Perfect for my small load of whites.

This was cool.

The truly lame moment happened after I was done writing and doing laundry. I got all the way home (a modest distance, but still) and realized I had forgotten my detergent at the laundromat. You know how people handle big problems with aplomb but fall apart at the dumbest things? All week people have been telling me I was reacting very well to this being flooded thing. I have tried to keep my spirits up and not lose my sense of humor.

Well, doing something as stupid as forgetting my brand new detergent at the laundromat made me dang near burst into tears. I made the drive back to Ilion, cursing my (lack of) brain and telling myself it was no big deal. Either the detergent would be there or somebody else would be happy to not have to buy some. Perhaps even another flood victim.

My not so random observation on this Lame Post Friday is that half-baked philosophy will only get you so far. I recovered my detergent. I still felt really, really dumb.

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Patriotic Run

Posted on July 5, 2013 by mohawkvalleygirl

In honor of Independence Day, I wore my ARMY t-shirt to go for this morning’s run.

I had originally thought I would be running every day this week, but with the flood… not so much. Monday and Wednesday I had to conserve my physical resources for hauling ruined junk out of the basement. Tuesday I had thought to do the same, but the basement had filled with water again. By the time I realized my little sump pump was not going to empty it in a timely fashion, it was too hot to run. I went to Curves instead, arguably a more strenuous workout.

Thursday (today), my husband is working from eight to 4:30, then from five to ten (five to ten sounds like a prison sentence, which is analogous to many jobs). I thought for what I planned on doing in his absence, I could be a little tired.

It was already warm when I started out, over 70 degrees with humidity. Yet I felt sure I could rock it. Then again, there was nothing wrong with taking a shorter run than planned, especially as the week was not turning into the work-out paradise I had envisioned.

I turned left from North Bellinger onto German Street, going toward where some of the flood damage was pretty bad. That section of German had been closed off all week, so I knew I might have to make a turn before too long.

Oh, it did look bad. A lovely stone fence in front of a beautiful historic-looking brick house is no more. The sidewalk got a little dicey at that point, but I was left side facing traffic as I went out into the road.

Then I saw that I could not loop around German onto Church Street as I had planned, because the bridge was closed. I was about to say I never heard about the bridge being closed, but I bet it did and I just don’t know what that bridge is called. It isn’t a very big bridge. Other than turn around the only thing I could do was go through the high school parking lot and see if their little foot bridge was still in use. It didn’t seem likely. I turned around.

I ran past all the side streets till I was beyond the flood zone. I ran down residential streets, enjoying flower beds that were not a muddy mess and curb sides not covered with people’s ruined stuff. I thought of pictures of New Orleans after Katrina and New Jersey after Sandy, and I felt fortunate.

But running was not getting any easier, because it was damn humid. I was not going to run as far as I had run on Sunday, 34 minutes, in case you wanted to know. I got back on my own street. How long would I run? Well, I would go a little way past the house, just to make it a full number. It seems a little silly to say I ran for 28 minutes 44 seconds.

Then I saw some neighbors talking on a porch, right about the time I wanted to be turning around. We exchanged good mornings and I kept running. I couldn’t very well run up to them, say good morning and run back home. Now that I’m writing this, I can’t quite explain my reluctance, but there it was. I ran around the block.

As I ran I reflected on the number of things people do just to keep from looking foolish. Like when I recently raised almost $600 for St. Baldrick’s Day, so I wouldn’t look silly in front of the other bald people (I don’t think any of them were concerned, but still). Then I thought, whatever makes you do the right thing.

So I made my 34 minutes, and my cold shower felt pretty refreshing (it will be a long while before my hot water heater is replaced and we get the gas turned back on). And I deem it patriotic enough on Independence Day to write about something I learned to love in the army.

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