Tag Archives: half-baked philosophy

Words Happen

Posted on June 6, 2013 by mohawkvalleygirl

I just looked back and saw that I did not do a Monday Middle-aged Musings, and that is good news for me. Now I can do a Midweek Musings and be off the hook.

The funny part is, I have two blog posts written that I could type in. The problem is, one of them will probably run over 1,000 words and I really ought to look a couple of things up before I start typing (does that intrigue you? I’m rather proud of it myself). The other is heavy on the half-baked philosophy and therefore more suitable for Lame Post Friday.

So, what am I left with, a post about what I’m not going to write a post about? Sounds pretty dull. The thing is, I haven’t been musing much this week, middle-agedly or otherwise. But I do have a question that just occurs to me: where do we draw the line between middle-aged musings and half-baked philosophy? Aren’t they awfully similar? And isn’t either one just an excuse for me to type whatever the hell I feel like for a few hundred words and call it a post?

You wouldn’t know it from this post, but I have actually been writing a lot this week. Yesterday I sat down and wrote the aforementioned 1,000+ word post, then worked on a new novel I had started on Monday. (Oh dear, didn’t mean to mention the novel. I hope I haven’t jinxed it.) This morning I wrote my Friday Lame Post, then worked some more on… that thing I wished I hadn’t mentioned. Can I just say, I LOVE writing! You do it, then suddenly you find yourself doing more of it! You write one thing, then you write something else! Words happen! (Ooh, good title.)

The irony is not lost on me: I am about to publish a singularly foolish post in which I brag about all this other great stuff I’ve written that I am, for reasons best known to myself (if that), I am not publishing yet. Let’s all muse on that for a while, shall we?

OK, we’re done.

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Hair Today

Posted on June 2, 2013 by mohawkvalleygirl

Well, today is the day. This afternoon, I get shaved as part of a St. Baldrick’s Day event to raise money for children’s cancer research. I begged for donations and got quite a few. Now I’d like to take a few words to honor my hair while it’s still on my head.

I have almost always disliked my hair. That’s pretty typical, I think. Most of us wish we looked different from what we do. People with curly hair want straight and vice versa. Tall people long to be petite, while us shorties envy the statuesque. Oh dear, now I’m getting into half-baked philosophy and it isn’t Lame Post Friday. I’ll stop now.

As a child I had blond hair, very straight. I remember once when my hair was freshly washed and dry, my mother said, “Cindy has hair like an angel.” My dad replied, “Too bad she doesn’t have disposition to match.” The sad thing was, even my hair was not angelic on a regular basis, but let’s not continue with that memory.

In the ’80s (the 1980s, wise guy) (you know who you are), I discovered the miracle of permanents. I went curly. Recently a high school friend posted an old yearbook picture on Facebook. Look at all that hair! I’m a little sorry I don’t know how to add the picture here, but only a little. Why would I want to remind everybody that I used to be much skinnier and cuter than I am now?

I think my favorite way to wear my hair is short and spiky, which look I rocked from the late ’90s till about a year ago. For the past 10 months or so I’ve been growing it out in anticipation of the shave. I’m quite excited to finally have it done.

If anybody wants to make a last minute contribution in honor of my bald pate, here once again is my participant website: http://www.stbaldricks.org/participants/mypage/642777/2013.

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Could Be the Lamest Post Yet

Posted on May 4, 2013 by mohawkvalleygirl

So I started writing at least three Friday Lame Posts at work today (while on a break OF COURSE). I don’t like any of them. And I have a very short time in which to come up with something else. OH NO!

No, it isn’t Wrist to Forehead Friday. For one thing, I don’t have time to make dramatic poses.

To be honest: as soon as I typed that sentence, I sat here staring at the screen, trying to think of something else to say. I had plenty of time to put my wrist onto my forehead. I was just too lazy.

Ah, that leads us into some half-baked philosophy suitable for Lame Post Friday (my meager brain hasn’t failed me yet!): A truism states that we all have time for the things that are truly important to us. Is this a true truism? Discuss.

I think that actually we don’t any of us have the time we’d like to have for all the things we’d like to do. However, most of us have more time than we will admit; we just take it up doing other things. This is hardly an earth shattering observation (and since the earth has never, in fact, shattered, I would submit that nobody has yet made an observation that can truly be described as such) (so now I feel better about that).

Where was I?

Ah yes, babbling on in hopes my word count will go high enough that I can call it a post. Hmmm… Over 200. That’s respectable.

Before I sign off, I will leave my readers with one thought. I thought all day about how it is sometimes difficult to write a post when Mohawk Valley Girl strives to adhere to the rule: If you can’t say anything nice, don’t say anything at all.

We’ll see who gets worried about that one.

Postscript: As personal acquaintances know, in real life I don’t always follow that rule. I’m more akin to Dorothy Parker when she purportedly said, “If you can’t say anything nice, sit right here next to me.”

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I Didn’t Edit Out the Lame

Posted on April 20, 2013 by mohawkvalleygirl

An interesting phenomenon has been happening with some of my blog posts lately: I edit.

Of course I’ve always edited to a point. Whether I write it first then type it in or compose (NOT compost, Ron) at the keyboard, I read it over and change a word here and there. Lately, however, I’ve been deleting, moving and completely re-writing entire paragraphs. Even adding paragraphs. It’s kind of fun.

I’m sure there are some “real” writers out there rolling their eyes. “Of COURSE you have to edit!” they are saying, with or without a sniff. “Editing is an important part of writing — maybe the MOST important part. Did you think your stuff could stand as written?”

Two schools of thought there. Others believe you should NEVER edit. You must be spontaneous and fresh, sticking to your “first thoughts.” “First thoughts” is an expression I got from Natalie Goldberg in Writing Down the Bones. For Goldberg, as for many creative souls, the Editor is that bad voice that lives in your head and says things like, “Don’t write that! That’s stupid! Why are you even writing at all?”

Regular readers (Hi, Sherry!) know I have conversations with a similar entity in my own head on a regular basis. I would submit that it isn’t only writers that hear such a voice. I think a lot of people who suffer from low self-esteem hear an unkind voice telling them they are ugly or stupid or worthless.

I don’t want to stray into psychiatry over here. Half-baked philosophy is my bailiwick. And I didn’t start out to write out about self-esteem; I meant to do a post on writing.

Well, how about some half-baked philosophy on the relationship between writing and self-esteem?

Or not.

Full disclosure: I wrote this last week (yes, while I was stressing over the silly weekend) with no real notion of when I would use it. Today, I thought it would fit right in with Lame Post Friday. And it will have to do, because I have nothing else, least of all time to come up with an alternative.

Further full disclosure: I did very little editing on this when I typed it in. The irony is not lost on me.

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A Little Less Stress?

Posted on April 13, 2013 by mohawkvalleygirl

Regular readers (Hi, Rick!) know I have spent the week in a state of stress over what ought to be a stress-relieving treat, namely a wine tasting trip to the Finger Lakes with certain female members of my family. I thought I might take Lame Post Friday to give an update on my stress.

Full disclosure: I’m writing this on Thursday, hoping to alleviate a little stress on Friday. I wrote Thursday’s post on Wednesday, Wednesday’s and Tuesday’s posts on Monday. I don’t remember what I wrote on Tuesday.

This morning WKTV News (out of Utica, NY) declared that it was Stress Free Thursday. Considering that I have spend Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday kvetching about the stress I’m under, I felt this spoke directly to me.

Bill Kardas, the weatherman, said life is too short to stress about things. This, I thought later, while not half-baked in itself, could lead me to some some half-baked philosophy suitable for Lame Post Friday.

“Life’s too short” is a reason many people use for many things. I like it. I think as a reason I like it even better than “It seemed like a good idea at the time,” my most often used reason. I daresay nobody but me remembers, but regarding the first wine tasting trip I took with my sisters, I explained, “Under the heading Life’s Too Short, we decided to do this and set a date.”

The occasion was my grandfather’s funeral. There is nothing like a funeral to point out how short life is and how important family is. Oh dear, now I’m getting sentimental as well as philosophical. That’s deadly.

I was gearing up to philosophize (half-bakedly, of course) about how we cause our own stress, as in, “I’m really stressing out over this.” But now I’m feeling all cuddly and soft. Well, one can’t always plan how one is going to feel.

This is Lame Post Friday, after all (or it will be when I publish this). I’m allowed to be random. I hope you all have a stress free weekend.

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A Lame Brand of Rotten

Posted on April 6, 2013 by mohawkvalleygirl

It has been a rotten day. And a rotten blogging day as well. I spent the day enduring one petty annoyance after another, most of them caused by myself, which of course makes it worse. They were all petty! None of them were funny! And I don’t feel like writing about them!

But here is what I did write at work, little realizing I was only at the beginning of my travails:

I am so mad at myself. I left the house this morning saying, “I feel like I’ve forgotten something,” and, what do you know, for once I did. My stupid purse! Because I’m stupid!

I know, there is no point in jumping to global conclusions about my mental capacities just because of one little brain fart. But still.

So there’s my random observation for this Lame Post Friday: I’m stupid. and my half-baked philosophy as well: no point in jumping to conclusions. I guess I’m done.

I’ll just add my usual explanation for the benefit of new readers (if any) and old readers who may have forgotten (I don’t expect people to keep track of ALL my silliness) that Lame Post Friday is the day I indulge in random observations and half-baked philosophy.

That was all I managed to write while at work. My day went downhill from there as I continued to make stupid mistakes and suffer petty grievances, none of which rate mentioning here. I mean, it’s one thing to suffer one stupid problem after another when you know you are going to at least get a humorous blog post out of it. Not today. It was a lame bad day.

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Lame Non-Sequiturs

Posted on March 29, 2013 by mohawkvalleygirl

I saw on the news Tuesday morning (WKTV out of Utica, NY) that somebody had declared it No Complaints Tuesday. My rebellious nature immediately asserted itself.

I will naturally complain about anybody telling me not to complain. After all, we can help improve things by complaining about what’s wrong. And if we can’t change things we can relieve our feelings by expressing ourselves. I have a lot of intelligent, thoughtful, CERTAINLY NOT whiny complaints, and I am sure you do, too, gentle reader.

That is the cue for somebody to sniff, “I never complain. It doesn’t do you any good to complain. I look on the positive side always.” Well, if that is truly what you say, I bet a lot of your friends complain about you as soon as you leave the room.

I wrote the preceding Tuesday morning but decided to save it for Non-Sequitur Thursday. I actually continued my Tuesday in a non-complaining fashion, I think largely because I had gotten it out of my system with that silly diatribe.

So today is Non-Sequitur Thursday, but it is also my Friday — that is, Lame Post Friday — since I have tomorrow off. Score! I can be random, half-baked and none of it has to make any sense (I KNOW some of you are saying, “So what else is new?” and what an obvious thing to say. Find some new jokes!).

I intend to spend a good part of the weekend watching cheesy movies which I will write about for your entertainment. I have some waiting on my DVR especially for the purpose. I might also hit some local retail establishments in search of Easter goodies.

Hey, why is it there a moon on my watch (how’s that for a non-sequitur) (and a random observation)? It can’t mean p.m., because I have my watch set to military time (if you want to annoy some people, tell them it’s 16:48 when they ask you what time it is). It’s not that I’m such a gung ho, prior service kind of veteran (but feel free to call me Sgt Q). It’s that this way when I set my alarm for 3:30 or 5 I know it will ring in the morning. Just another little bit of security when I go to sleep at night that I’ll get up on time in the morning. Maybe the moon has always been there. Or maybe my watch is mooning me. Wise-ass Timex!

Well, that is over 400 words. I think that is plenty enough silliness for one day (is that half-baked philosophy?) (I know “plenty enough” is a tautology, but I like the sound of it). Time to get on with my weekend. Happy Thursday, everyone!

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Running Commentary to the Rescue

Posted on February 24, 2013 by mohawkvalleygirl

I started running again earlier this month but have not been having a great success of it. Among other things, the weather has turned against me.

Just as a side note: I feel a great resistance to including that last sentence. It is quite true that it got extremely cold and many people do not run in extreme weather. Yet when I admit that I am one of them, all I can see in my head are people giving me disdainful looks and getting out miniature violins.

But, you know, I think those people only live in my head, and I’m going to kick them out. I think most actual, non-head-living people can respect others’ choices to run or not to run. I know I would rather applaud people’s accomplishments than denigrate their shortcomings, especially when “shortcomings” means “failure to live up to arbitrary standards set by unreasonable people that live in their heads.”

Well, that was a digression. I had meant this to be a straight running post. I guess sometimes I can’t help but stray into a little half-baked philosophy.

Be that as it may, I decided to run today because it had passed 1 p.m. and I had neither hide nor hair of a blog post. I thought, “Running Commentary will come to my rescue!” (Oh, wait a minute, that is a much better title than “Well, I Had to Write About Something”)

As soon as I made the decision, I felt better. I have missed running. At odd moments I will suddenly think of a street that I only see when I run down it. I miss those streets! Then I think I MUST start running again and continue to work and build myself up, because most of those streets are not a short jaunt from my house (I see those streets all the time).

I got dressed, reminded my schnoodle Tabby that she doesn’t like to run with me, and set out.

The temperature was above freezing, and I could see a few raindrops in the puddles. The snow on the sidewalks was mushy but not yet slushy. I can understand why some people run in the road, but I choose not to. For one thing, on days like this it would have to be the middle of the road or I would be running in puddles. I took the mushy snow.

“It burns more calories,” I told myself. “It takes more effort.” I continued to make the effort.

As I went, I had to think that I probably did not look as if I was running at all. Slogging through the snow, dodging around the puddles — ooh, bare pavement! Awesome! Watch out for that ice. I did not look around and observe houses and yards, as I enjoy to do when I run. I figured it was a good way to end up on my butt if I hit some ice or ankle deep in water if I encountered a puddle.

Some of those puddles were like reservoirs, the snowbanks on either side making effective retaining walls. I confess, I was two blocks beyond the deepest puddle before I came up with “retaining walls.” At first I thought “dams,” but you don’t usually have a dam on either side of a reservoir (and, yes, I said, “Damn!” when I stepped in the reservoir). Well, I like anything that adds interest to my run.

It was really a pretty good run. I added a little bit to the length of time I ran (I always run for a certain length of time rather than a certain distance). I even kind of sort of sprinted at the end. At least, I lengthened my stride and picked up speed. It was awesome! My legs felt long, lean and powerful! I hoped I didn’t hit any stray ice.

Tabby graciously walked around the block with me for my cool down, as usual. When we were almost all the way around, the rain turned to snow and got heavier. How clever of me to get my run in before winter returned.

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This is a Silly Post, Isn’t It?

Posted on February 23, 2013 by mohawkvalleygirl

Nobody really thought I was going to forgo Lame Post Friday, as I declared at the end of yesterday’s post, did they?

Oh, there’s some half-baked philosophy right there. How can I resist? I recently read somewhere that women and minorities tend to add qualifiers to their statements. This is blank, ISN’T IT? I think this, DON’T YOU? Nobody thought, DID THEY? Well, I am a woman (am I not?) (really hate to say “aren’t I?” or even “ain’t I?”) (although of the two, I prefer the latter, because Grace Kelly said it in Rear Window) (but I digress).

Why do you suppose this is? I think (philosophically, of course) that it is different reasons for different women. Some women are unsure of themselves. Some want everybody to get along and feel that means agreeing on most things. Some are just eager to be loved. And for many, I’m sure it is just a bad habit (don’t you think so?). And I KNOW, before anybody tells me, that there are women who do not follow this speech pattern. To those women, I say, you go, girls (they might be offended that I call them “girls” instead of “women,” but that is a chance I’ll take).

Come to think of it, I said I would ATTEMPT to forgo Lame Post Friday, but I made no promises. That means I’m in the clear (right?). (I’m really just adding these qualifiers to be silly now; you guys got that, didn’t you?)(OK, that last “didn’t you?” I meant).

Actually, I personally have a tendency to make statements, and I am very surprised when people disagree with me. As many women do, completely without qualifiers. “Oh, I don’t think so,” they say, as if I am some odd specimen for thinking such a thing.

Which brings up another point: I have been philosophizing about something I read which I have not observed personally, randomly or otherwise (I feel I must insert here for the benefit of new readers, if any, that Lame Post Friday ideally consists of random observations and half-baked philosophies). And I’ve gone on for over 300 words. That is plenty long enough for a Lame Friday Post. Happy Friday, everyone.

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About That Play…

Posted on February 16, 2013 by mohawkvalleygirl

When we last left our hero (um, that’s me) (I went masculine as gender neutral, because I did not want to refer to myself as an illegal substance), she was about to stop writing her blog post and instead work on finishing a play she had started. OK, enough with the third person crap.

What I’m saying is, I did not write my post on breaks at work today, as I usually do. I trusted to last minute inspiration and my ability in the past to write something on the fly. Or is it off the cuff? I get my clothing metaphors confused.

It is, of course, Lame Post Friday, my day of random observations and half-baked philosophy. I seem to recall mentioning yesterday that we should save the half-baked philosophy about finished works for Lame Post Friday. And here we are.

I find it sad but true when I read a novel or a play or even a magazine article that is not very good: my first thought is, I could do so much better. My second thought is, well, why didn’t you? One reason the worst novel in the world can get published over my deathless prose (I don’t really think it’s deathless; I just like that expression) is that that novel GOT FINISHED.

And here is some more half-baked philosophy: one can take the above thought two ways. It could be an inspiration to write more and concentrate on finishing. Or it can be a discouraging criticism: if you haven’t finished a damn play yet, you never will, give it up now!

Well, which way did you think I was going to take it? You know I like to keep my blog positive! So I spent my time before I had to start working and my break writing my play. Unfortunately, I dare not tell you anything about it, because it is a work in progress. It’s not that I fear my gentle readers will steal my ideas, but I do fear “helpful” criticism (and I am certain MY readers would never offer any other kind). More to the point, I fear that having talked about the play, I will no longer feel the need to write it. I told the story, it’s done. It can happen.

In fact, I think I’d better shut up now.

Happy Friday, everyone.

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