Category Archives: Lame Post Friday

Lame: Ain’t it Grand?

It does not matter how many ridiculous posts I may have in a week, I still love my Lame Post Friday, home of random observations and half-baked philosophy.

I took my schnoodle Tabby for a walk this afternoon, hoping to come up with some of the former. Mostly I observed tulips in people’s yards. I love tulips. I think I like the orange and yellow ones best. They are blooming late this year, as are most things. Perhaps I should go into some half-baked philosophy here about being something of a late bloomer myself. Then again, most people probably do not want to hear about my bloomers (sorry, couldn’t resist).

I also observed a young couple on the sidewalk a block or two ahead of me, holding hands. Young love, ain’t it grand? My main observation was of their clothing. It seems to me that gender divisions in clothes are becoming more pronounced. The boys’ are getting baggier while the girls’ are getting tighter. Well, I have not exactly done a study.

The warm weather does seem to have people in a better mood (just to put in some more half-baked philosophy). Warm weather, warm hearts? Well, Tabby and I enjoyed it. For the first time since fall, I walked without any kind of jacket.

Wow, this is a really boring post (my next stunning observation). However, my gentle readers will suffer no longer. I’m over 200 words. Happy Friday, everybody.

Light-headed and Light-hearted

I’m thinking no one is surprised that I am indulging in Lame Post Friday, least of all me.

In fact, I had thought to make at least a Pedestrian Post about a walk I took with Tabby this morning. Then as the day wore on, the headache I had yesterday did not go away, as expected (I didn’t mention I had a sinus headache yesterday, I believe as a result of recent cold temperatures or perhaps of spring pollens. I was pleased with myself that I managed to make a “real” post yesterday, but we all knew that wouldn’t last) (in fact, I had intended not to even mention the headache, because people who complain all the time about their aches and pains are tiresome) (oops). Where was I? Ah yes, I took a decongestant and have been lightheaded ever since.

And yet, it has been a good day. Good Friday, in fact. For Catholics a day of fasting and prayer. Of course any day is a good day for prayer and reflection. But Mohawk Valley Girl tries to stay off of politics and religion. I know, I’m a big chicken, scared of a little controversy and hate. Well, I am afraid of hate, but apparently not afraid to admit it. Yay, me.

This post is beginning to ramble if not babble. Sorry about that. Blame the decongestant, which is as good as dynamite to my sinuses, although not as loud. I certainly hope my brain comes back (I can just hear somebody saying, “Why? You never use it.” Oh that is so droll. If I say you are a wit, I am half right).

The only justification of a ridiculous post is that it be short. Happy Friday, everybody.

Isn’t It Romantic?

Oh dear! It is happening again! I want to make my blog post NOW and I haven’t written anything yet, and I want to write it quickly.

How annoying. I had even thought of a good Friday Lame Post, complete with headline. But I didn’t write it while at work, because I was reading a romance novel.

I really want to clarify the term “romance novel.” Steven (my delightful husband) refers to them as romance novels, and I suppose at heart they are. However, they are not the soulless, stupid generic romance novels. I don’t want to mention specifics of authors or publishers, because I just don’t want the hate, but you must know what I mean. I shan’t even elaborate. But I will mention what I like: Regency Romances by Georgette Heyer, and Gothic Romances by Victoria Holt or Phyllis Whitney (and gothic has nothing to do with young people wearing all black and heavy eye-liner. Just saying).

Today was Victoria Holt. I would just like to mention that I often say I don’t read these books, I eat them. To me they are like potato chips. You start and you just can’t stop. You know they are not good FOR you, but they are JUST SO GOOD. You can’t stop. And sometimes you hate yourself in the morning.

In fact, I hate myself less for novels than I do for potato chips. Let’s face it: any reading probably does your brain some good. Junk food, not so much.

So now I am over 200 words. That makes a post, by my own self-imposed rules. I’m going to go ahead and enjoy my Friday. Hope you all have a happy weekend.

Where’s H.G. Wells When You Need Him?

Today is the day. No, it’s nothing exciting. It’s more along the lines of a looming deadline. Today is the day I said I would write and type in Friday’s and Saturday’s blog posts so I wouldn’t have to worry about it.

Isn’t this nicely time warpy? If I use this (and it seems that I am), you will be reading it at least a day AFTER today. Yesterday was the day. Oh dear, where’s H.G. Wells when you need him? (Say, that might be a good title.)

Actually, it kind of plays into my hands, because this is likely to be posted on Lame Post Friday. Although with all the time warp stuff going on, it may be better suited to Non-Sequitur Thursday. I didn’t have a Non-Sequitur Thursday this week. I don’t like to use all my slacker categories in the same week (although I suppose it happens).

Actually, I’m a little surprised I did manage two “real” posts this week. I’ve had a trip to the library, two traumatic appointments and the stress of not getting everything done for my fabulous weekend. Not to mention the stress of not having lost that last ten pounds (in fact, gaining five) before seeing my beautiful sisters (I was never the pretty one) and having nothing to wear, as per usual.

Full disclosure: the appointments were only traumatic to me because I am just so susceptible to being traumatized. I don’t expect any sympathy from anybody. And not for nuthin’ but, why does nobody ever believe me when I tell them I am a delicate flower? Oh well, by the time this gets published, I hope to be on to a better place (you knew I meant the weekend, right?).

One Nickel at a Time

It is Lame Post Friday. Actually it is not a real Friday for me, because I have to work tomorrow. But I must make a ridiculous post, because I didn’t write a thing all day and I want to get this posted quickly so I can relax myself before going to bed early. At least I will try to avoid the topic of Why I Can’t Write a Post.

I took a walk earlier with my beloved schnoodle, Tabby. As well as two poop bags (I like to carry a spare), I carried a grocery sack in case I found any deposit bottles or cans. Earlier this week, I mentioned to a co-worker that I was going to the laundromat. Regular readers may recall that our washer and drier perished in last summer’s flood (I think I mentioned it in a post; too lazy to go back and check).

“I wouldn’t go to the laundromat,” she declared. “I’d be saving my pennies and picking up bottles and cans from the side of the road!”

“These things take time,” I told her. As I walked, I reflected on how much time it would take, if I financed a washer and drier entirely with deposits. Or even if I wanted to buy a candy bar. I’m afraid my little dog would wear out long before I gathered enough bottles and cans. Not to mention my patience.

Ooh, look, I’m over 200 words. I say that’s good. Tomorrow I only work six hours, so I will have plenty of time to come up with something a little more blogworthy. But I hope you are all having a lovely Friday.

Maybe Tomorrow I Can Write About the Play

I was so certain my gyrations this afternoon would yield material for a blog post that I didn’t write a thing all day. Well, a letter to my sister. I know, doesn’t count.

And now I must quickly come up with something. You see, we are going to Ilion Little Theatre (ILT) to see Don’t Talk to the Actors. We were supposed to go last Friday to see it, but I had a headache. I mean a really bad headache. I may have written a blog post about it. Today I had a headache again. I guess it was a good headache, because it’s mostly gone now. Phew!

I’m looking forward to the play, as I do to any ILT production. This one I am especially anxious to see. It is directed by Steve Wagner, who played Elwood P. Dowd in Harvey year before last. I played his sister (in case you missed all my myriad blog posts about that production). He’s cool. The cast features a number of ILT veterans, including two who are returning to the stage. Goody.

So I spent all afternoon, thinking I have to go here, do this, hurry there, get that done and, oh yeah, think of something to wear. I thought at least the wardrobe would be worth a post (this is Lame Post Friday after all). But no, I drove around and did all my stuff without drama. I even figured out something respectable and not very exciting to wear.

I’m ready to go. I only have to publish my blog post. And here it is, boring but done.

The play, by the way, is at the Stables, Remington Avenue, Ilion, NY, Friday, Saturday and Sunday, March 21, 22, 23, 8 p.m. Friday and Saturday, 2 p.m. Sunday. For more information visit their website, www.ilionlittletheatre.org, or their Facebook page (Ilion Little Theatre Club).

Go Jump in the Lame

Here I am on Lame Post Friday and once again, I got nuthin’.

How can this be? How many posts have I written about how once I start writing, I just write more? It’s true. I write the blog post every day, and then I write the novel. And then I write more. So how come I’m not writing right now?

I know, writing about not writing is still writing. It just isn’t very interesting. It’s kind of — dare I say it? — lame.

Ah, but Lame Post Friday is for random observations and half-baked philosophy, and I believe yesterday I brought up some half-baked philosophy. A minor confession: I often declare things “half-baked philosophy suitable for Lame Post Friday” merely because I don’t feel like dealing with them on whatever day it happens to be. But when you get to Lame Post Friday and there isn’t a random observation in sight…

I think my question was something along the lines of is there a discernible reason for me to be writing this blog at all? Kind of a silly question, but consider the source (me). I don’t know if it’s half-baked philosophy after all. I write the blog because I like writing the blog. Even on days when I can’t think of a non-lame thing to say.

This is Not a More Better Post

Today is just not working out for me.

That phrase popped into my head as I finally got changed into my sweats and realized I REALLY want to start my weekend now but have not yet written my blog post. I cheer myself up with the thought, It’s Lame Post Friday. Instead of my usual random observations and half-baked philosophy, I offer the Week in Weather.

Monday I did not drive straight home but had a minor adventure. I don’t know that it was particularly a Mohawk Valley adventure, but then again, maybe it was. Winter was still on. I had to clear a layer of heavy, wet snow off my windshield and hood. It had been snowing for most of the day, so I think the snow was previously on the roof and had worked its way down. That was good, because that meant there was less on the roof to slide down while I drove.

The uneven tire pressure light in my SUV was on, so I stopped at the gas station where they have that groovy tire filler where you just punch in the pressure and it figures it out for you. It is most convenient, but one still must crouch next to one’s tires, sometimes for a long time. I wanted to kneel, but not in an inch of snow and ice. Ugh.

From the tire adventure, I went to Aldi’s to get some canned goods. Their lot was full, so I approached with trepidation. Still, I wanted beans. Apparently all the snow had fallen after they had plowed. The space I found to park in had not even been driven over. Still, a space is a space. I took it. The only adventuresome part came later, when I tried to push a full cart through the snow to get back to my vehicle. Oh well, I comforted myself, it burns more calories.

Winter waned as the week progressed. I believe I wrote about a wet walk we took with Tabby yesterday. Today I took Tabby down the sidewalk in hopes of meeting Steven as he came home from work. This time I sensibly put on my flood boots. My feet stayed dry, if not exactly warm.

I mostly felt happy the rain had stopped. It had been raining like the proverbial sonofabitch earlier (pardon my french). I worried about my basement but since the streets didn’t seem too bad, I cravenly did not go down and check. When Steven came home he informed me that water was indeed coming up into the basement. We went down and sopped with towels and a mop. Once again, my flood boots came in handy.

At last we felt we had done all we could. I may head out somewhere tomorrow and get a more better mop and bucket (more better being the technical term). That will possibly make a more better blog post on Saturday. As always, I hope you’ll stay tuned.

Another Stroll Down Memory Lame

Does anybody else remember this:

“TASTES GREAT!”

“LESS FILLING!”

“I still don’t know why they wanted me to be in this commercial.”

Yes, I am about to write a Friday Lame Post worthy of Non-Sequitur Thursday. The fact is, once again, I got nuthin'(the period doesn’t look right after the apostrophe). (Oh, but it looks fine after the parenthesis.)

I didn’t even try very hard to write anything while I was at work. I managed almost a page on my novel (it seems to be going well, but I’m sure that’s deceiving), and I conversed with a co-worker.

Oh, here’s… I don’t know if it’s a random observation or what, but the word is “converse.” Certain sergeants in the army said “conversate,” as in, “You don’t need to be off there conversating.” My elementary school teachers used to say “visiting,” as in, “Do your work and don’t be visiting with your neighbor!” Incidentally, I almost always visited with my neighbor, even when the teacher sat us boy/girl in hopes of curtailing such a thing.

And how about that, back when boy/girl was supposed to be a bad thing? Was it ever, really? I mean, I didn’t want them to be my boyfriends, but I would always talk to the boys (visit? conversate?).

Just as a final note (and here’s the real non-sequitur of the day): I think today is my 1,000th post. Isn’t that cool? Happy Friday, everyone.

Blame the Book

First, a confession. I took the day off.

Not from work, of course. I went to my place of employment and did what they pay me to do (remember: not a work blog). But I wrote nothing. No novel, no blog post, no letter, not even a grocery list. I read a book.

In my defense, it’s a library book that I have to finish and get back to the library. And it is a history book, so I am educating myself. Becoming more erudite and informed. Oh, who am I kidding? It’s easier to read than to write, so today I read.

The fact is, I love to read even more than I love to write. If I don’t have anything else to read, I’ll read the backs of cereal boxes. But I almost always have something else to read. Libraries, used book sales, garage sales, thrift stores and even Barnes and Noble supply me with my drug of choice (um, that’s reading) (I didn’t need to clarify that, did I?).

I actually read less now than I used to. I used to read to the exclusion of interacting with people. I have this problem of getting absorbed in a book. I used to read and watch TV at the same time. That would drive anybody else in the room nuts when I would constantly ask what I had missed on the TV show because I was reading.

“Get your nose out of that book!” was a phrase I often heard. When I bothered to listen.

In addition to interacting with people, I use free time at work to write. I didn’t used to do that so much with the result that I used to write a whole lot less than I write now. Read more, wrote less; read less, write more (in that sentence the first “read” is past tense, the second is present) (have you ever noticed it’s the SAME WORD?).

So this has been my Friday Lame Post. My miserable excuse for not writing a better post. I feel it will be understood by others who suffer from a similar addiction.