Tag Archives: lame post

Yes, Another Damn Headache

Dear Reader,

Please excuse Mohawk Valley Girl from making a blog post today. She has a very bad headache.

Sincerely,
Mohawk Valley Girl

OK, that was really lame, and it is not Lame Post Friday yet. I would like to spout out some half-baked philosophy regarding the contention that a foolish blog post is better than no blog post at all. But, again, half-baked philosophy is for Lame Post Friday. What I am really hoping for, however, is I Don’t Have a Headache Friday.

Interesting phenomenon: I dragged myself from my sickbed to write just a couple of lines so that I’ve posted something, and I can’t seem to stop typing.

OK, now I can.

Beyond Lame

It is a rare day when I can’t even seem to write a post about Why I Can’t Write a Post Today. Then again, it is Lame Post Friday. How lame is it to not even be able to write a lame post?

In my defense… oh, never mind my defense. It’s just more kvetching about my ill health. What in the world is the matter with me anyways? All I do is complain. Then again, the more you complain, the longer God lets you live, according to an older sister of mine.

That is pretty much what I wrote at work. Then I worked on my novel, so at to ease my guilt, and wrote a letter, because I like to write a letter. My usual method while at work is to think about my blog post while working then write it on a break. I had other things to think about today. I’m going wine tasting with the girls tomorrow. That is, the girls in my family. I could go into some half-baked philosophy about how hanging out with your family is both more and less pressure than hanging out with friends, but quite frankly, I’m afraid some of my family might read this. Probably they won’t, but you never know.

In the meantime, my headache is back, so to avoid more tiresome kvetching, I will end this post. Just barely over 200 words. I say it’ll do.

Kind of a Time Warp

I had intended to have all posts about Halloween movies till Halloween night. I have plenty of material to work with, thanks to TCM and the miracle of DVR. Well, I was working on it, and let me tell you, my post on The Tingler is getting scary and not in a good way.

On the brighter side, I noticed yesterday on my computer that WordPress seems to be twelve hours ahead of me. Thus yesterday, when I wrote about Cat People, was Halloween. Today I can go on to November, or as the retail world seems to think, Christmas. I was thinking I could post this silliness tomorrow on Lame Post Friday, when I realized, according to WordPress, THAT’S TODAY!

However, as I wrote the preceding earlier, before beginning my shift at work, it was (and still is as I type this) Thursday. Non-Sequitur Thursday, in fact (if you saw me trying to rearrange the paragraphs of my Tingler post using asterisks, you would agree that it is). I was and still am having an indecisive day. I had to flip a coin to decide whether to drink coffee or water as I was writing before work (drinking both was ineligible for reasons I will not go into here).

I wrote more while at work, but it was fairly tiresome. There was one parenthetical comment I rather liked, but I can’t figure out how to fit it in now. At any rate, I am over 200 words. I deem that respectable. I will continue to work on my post about The Tingler and eventually publish it, regardless of the day WordPress or the calendar say it is.

Heard It Through The Grapevine

There are days I don’t suffer from Writer’s Block, I suffer from Show It To Anybody Block. This sometimes takes the form of Write It And Cross It Out, but other times the words sit in my notebook, staring at me accusingly. “How could you write such a thing?” or “You’re not going to SHOW this to anybody are you?” or, more often, “What kind of a chicken-shit are you that you can write a thing and never let it see the light of day?”

I must be a writer. Even my words have words!

So you may have guessed, it is Non-Sequitur Thursday, better known as another excuse to write a post about Why I Can’t Write a Post Today. The thing is: I WROTE today! I started three different blog posts! I just can’t seem to finish any of them.

One of many memorable lines is the movie The Big Chill is, “I’m not hung up on completion.” It is said rather defensively, and in general I agree. It is usually a good idea to finish what we start. In my case that would include blog posts, novels and cleaning my closet. I probably could come up with some good half-baked philosophy about why it’s good to finish things or even why it is SOMETIMES a good thing not to. However, half-baked philosophy is for Lame Post Friday.

So, at the risk of being sequential on Non-Sequitur Thursday, I offer another apology for a foolish post. Still, I may have entertained. I may have offered an excuse for somebody to feel some superiority. Remember, no life is wasted. You can always stand as a bad example.

Hope to see you on Lame Post Friday.

It’s a Non-Sequitur, It’s a Memory, NO, It’s Lame Post Friday!

Full Disclosure: I’m writing blog posts ahead this week. We’re going away for the weekend, and I don’t want to worry about getting up extra early on Friday or finding a computer on Saturday (the only full day we’ll be gone) (oh dear, I hope nobody made a note of that and intends to rob my house) (well, if you do, please clean the bathroom while you’re there, it’s disgusting) (and anybody that just said “TMI” to that last bit, Shut up! You know I hate that expression!).

Where was I? Ah, yes, this will be either Non-Sequitur Thursday or Lame Post Friday. I’ll decide when I type it into the computer. As you may have guessed, this post is a silly one.

When I registered at the Superhero Sprint on Saturday, they gave me an itty bitty box of candy, maybe an inch long, half-inch wide, quarter-inch deep. It had the Incredible Hulk on the outside and said it contained Candy Sticks.

I put the box in my purse and did not think about it again till the other day at work, when I happened to notice it. Now, I like to say I don’t see the point of candy that isn’t chocolate. That is not really accurate, of course, but I’m sure chocolate lovers see my point. Furthermore, I am trying to cut down on sweets (for me that is easier than cutting back on salty treats and deep-fried yumminess). I asked my friend Karen if she wanted them.

“What are they?”

“I know know; it says Candy Sticks. I thought it might be good if you needed that little sugar boost.” For my own sugar boost needs, I generally rely on hot chocolate out of the machine or substitute caffeine.

Pause for PSA: Kids! Don’t use artificial stimulants!

Back to the blog: Karen opened up the box and we peeked at the candy sticks.

“Why, those are candy cigarettes,” I exclaimed. “Remember candy cigarettes?” Not being worried if she dated herself in front of me, Karen nodded.

They weren’t exactly candy cigarettes, because they didn’t have the red food coloring tip (probably made with red dye number whatever that caused cancer). Still, the resemblance was striking.

“Think of it,” I said. “For years, all those candy-cigarette-making-machines stood idle, because it wasn’t cool to sell candy cigarettes any more. Then somebody got the idea, ‘Hey! We’ll make candy STICKS instead!’ And all those machines got used again!”

I don’t know if Karen was similarly struck at the thought or if she just likes to laugh at my nonsense. But I thought the whole story was good enough for a silly blog post. Candy cigarettes! What a blast from the past!

Ooh, I just realized, I could save this post for Monday, when it could be a Middle-aged Memory. But, no, I think I will use it for Lame Post Friday. For one thing, I’m too tired to write up and type in yet another post.

Have a nice weekend!

How Lame of Me

It is Lame Post Friday, and I am indeed lame. I did not write anything at work today (except for a paragraph or two on my novel)(in the interests of accuracy). I did not think of anything I could write about. I did not come home and run or walk so as to write about that. True, I could still do one of those, but I want to get this post written NOW.

Oh, just a brief update on my computer tribulations of Wednesday. The tablet is working now. I don’t know why or how but am not looking a gift horse in the mouth.

Ah, that gives me a lame topic to write about: another Cliche Revisited (I love to pick apart a cliche). Never look a gift horse in the mouth. Why not? If you have a horse, wouldn’t you like to know how old it is? Or if it needs dental work? The Trojan Horse should definitely have been looked in the mouth, or I guess the stomach, where the soldiers were hiding. Um, I’m not clear on if the Trojans were inside the horse or the ones who received it as a gift. And I do not care enough to look it up.

Hmmm, can’t think of another cliche to refute. How lame of me.

Well, how long does a Lame Friday Post have to be to count? Usually if I go over 200 words, I am content. Ooh, and I did. Happy Friday, everybody.

Walking into the Weekend

After two days of 80+ degree weather, things cooled off here in the Mohawk Valley. Therefore, after supper, I suggested Steven, Tabby and I take a walk, so I could write my blog post about that, rather than my usual Lame Post Friday schtick.

Full disclosure: Earlier in the day, I had told myself that if it did not rain, I would go running and write my post about that. Imagine my chagrin when, on leaving work, I discovered that it was NOT raining. In my defense, I had spent a good portion of the day with a rather debilitating headache, such as I am unfortunately subject to. I try not to complain about my headaches overly much, but I do just mention them, especially when they prevent me from doing something I intended to do.

This being Lame Post Friday, I could now go into some half-baked philosophy about how what to me is “merely mentioning” is to somebody else “pissing, moaning and whining like a baby.” Somebody unpleasant, no doubt. Never mind, I’m writing about our walk.

Steven and I put on sweatshirts over our t-shirts. Tabby, of course, had her natural fur coat. Steven and I felt a little chilly right off the bat, especially when the wind blew. Tabby seemed fine. Then again, Tabby ran up and down the backyard barking excitedly while Steven smoked a cigarette. I’ll have to try that sometime. Maybe not the barking. We’ll see.

We decided to walk the Tabby way. She pulled us down Bellinger Street toward Myers Park. We like to go through the park. I admired some flowers still blooming on a neighbor’s porch. We discussed garden plans for next year, and Steven shared some gardening memories from his childhood.

It felt very good to walk, and I enjoyed the fall-like temperature. Our walk lasted about a half hour. It was not very eventful, but we enjoyed it. Now we will continue to enjoy our Friday night and the rest of the weekend. I’m hoping more blogworthy adventures will ensue.

Whine O’Clock

Yes, it is Lame Post Friday, and it should surprise no one that I got nuthin’.

I was about to say I’ve had a bear of a week, but I seem to remember last week being rather bearish as well (ooh, look at that, according to my computer “bearish” is so a word; I thought I had just now made it up). Earlier today I told a co-worker I was in a terrible mood, because all I could think about was things that piss me off. She advised me to think about something else.

“What should I think about?”

“3:30 this afternoon.” That’s our quitting time. “Wine-thirty.”

“It’s whine-thirty all day long for me,” I admitted. “Because all I do is whine.”

See, you get the pun right away when you write it down.

I thought it was a kind of a preemptive strike on my part (I’ll be damned, according to my computer pre-emptive is not hyphenated) to admit that I was whining. You know how upsetting it can be when all you want to do is relieve your feelings by expressing your discontent and you get told to stop whining. Actually, I had taken care to go to the co-worker that doesn’t usually say that. You have to be careful who you whine to. Uh, I mean express your discontent.

I was going to go into some half-baked philosophy about whining and perspective, but I believe I have covered it before. I would look back, find the post (or posts, I know I repeat myself sometimes), but hey, it’s Friday and I’m one of those lucky bastards who have a three day weekend. I’m thinking it’s beer o’clock.

Not Easy Being Me

I believe I have observed before, the trouble with these “easy on myself” posts such as Lame Post Friday and Middle-aged Musings Monday (why, yes, that is today) is that I still have to write them.

I enjoy this blogging hobby, I really do. It is not burdensome to sit on my break at work and write a blog post. In fact, I did that today. Only I didn’t finish it. It is about the cheesy movie I may have alluded to yesterday (why, yes, that was Wrist to Forehead Sunday, another “easy on myself” day).

I put “easy on myself” in quotes, because quite often I find that it is not easy. The really annoying thing is, it’s not much good either. I mean, if something is difficult and not much fun, shouldn’t there be some reward? You know, like if I eat carrot sticks instead of french fries, I could lose weight (anybody out there saying in an annoying tone of voice, “I LIKE carrot sticks,” you can have mine). If I go to work, I will get a paycheck (and anybody out there who LOVES their job, I bet you don’t love it ALL the time). If I must make an effort to write, it will be good (given that “good” is a subjective term) (sorry, had to put in another parenthetical comment to be symmetrical).

I find, not so much.

Sometimes the posts I grunt out one word at a time read exactly as if I grunted. Them. Out. One. Word. At. A. Time. (and if you think it’s not annoying to type like that, try it). On the other hand, this is not a hard and fast rule. Sometimes I am glad I took the effort. Sometimes some of the things that roll off my pen in a delightful haze of I-love-to-write are… not so delightful as I thought they were.

It sounds as if I am gearing up to some half-baked philosophy about there are no guarantees. Or maybe I can only do the best I can do. Or better luck next time.

Save the half-baked philosophy for Lame Post Friday. For today, my Middle-aged Musing is: it is not always easy to write. But I sure love to do it.

Oh, Just Write It!

Is cooking conducive to writing? Discuss amongst yourselves.

I am not exactly cooking as I write this (by hand in a notebook, standing at my kitchen counter). I am popping popcorn (on the stove in oil, as God intended) (it’s JUST an EXPRESSION! Sheesh!).

I wrote that much and got stuck. Still, I got the urge to open the notebook and start writing as soon as I got the oil in the pot. I thought that was interesting.

You know, I think Wrist to Forehead Sunday is becoming even more deeply ingrained into my schedule than Lame Post Friday. Actually, this morning, I am more inclined to put the palm of my hand or my cold fingers on my forehead, because I have a dreadful headache. Partying too heartily on Saturday night, you ask? Well, I don’t know about that, but I did stay up later than normal.

Be all that as it may, what is a blogger to do when a post must be written (according to my rules, anyways) but her head is aching and she wants nothing better than to retreat into the TV watching and crocheting portion of the day (I got some new yarn especially for the purpose)? What I did do was eat the popcorn and think about it (Steven was hogging the computer anyways), then pour myself some blue Gatorade (for some reason good for headaches) and get onto the computer to Write The Damn Thing Anyways.

We did go for a most enjoyable walk with Tabby earlier (before the headache had kicked in). It was still cool out, not too sunny, which was good since I had forgotten my Crazy Old Lady hat. We stopped and chatted with some neighbors who were having a garage sale (didn’t buy anything for once). We discussed our respective flood experiences, what we’d heard about who lost what, and had anybody gotten any money from insurance or the government yet. We concluded that we had been more fortunate than some others.

Well, look at that, word count over 300. I call that respectable. Don’t worry (if you even were), I won’t be too lame in the coming days. We saw an awesomely cheesy movie last night (when I may or may not have been partying too heartily), and I hope to do some bloggable cooking today. As always, I hope you’ll stay tuned.