Category Archives: humor

Am I Write?

I always say writing begets writing.  The more you write, the more you will write.  Having typed in those two sentences, I sit here, typing in a third sentence and backspacing it out, several times, because it is a cliche, or because it is not quite what I wanted to say, or, oh well, any of the many reasons one decides to unwrite what one has written.

What I’m trying to say is, I have been writing since I got home from work and I’m tired.  On the brighter side, I finished and emailed two articles to Mohawk Valley Living magazine.  On the duller side, I am just barely ahead of deadline, and I had faithfully promised to do better this month.  In my defense, it cannot be denied that shit happens.

So this is a Monday Mental Meanderings post, and I guess my thoughts are indeed meandering.  This is what happens when one writes a daily blog and one clearly does not write enough.  If I wrote enough, I would have at least a couple of extra posts hanging around somewhere, just waiting for me to hit Publish.  Well, one cannot live one’s life on “if.”  What is that nursery rhyme: If wishes were horses, beggars would ride.

Then again (see how I argue with myself?) what is a fiction writer (which I sometimes am) but somebody who continually asks and answers the question, “What if?”  What if several people all wanted a guy dead, and then he dropped dead?  That is the plot of most of my murder mysteries.  Oh that reminds me, I have to finish my script for Secrets at Suiter House, the murder mystery I am writing for Herkimer County Historical Society.  I’ll keep you posted on how that goes.

 

We Went with Murder

When my husband Steven and I debated what movies to watch this afternoon, I said, “Murder or monsters.”  I thought that would make a good blog post title, then I decided to go with the above.  I hope I made the right decision.

Remember cigarette lighters? I remember my grandmother having one.

Our first movie was Strangers on a Train, a Hitchcock I am especially fond of.  I like that Farley Granger, who also starred in Rope, one of my all-time favorites.  He was a very good-looking young man, but in the extras of Rope, I see he became this really cool-looking older guy.  He looked like somebody you would enjoy to hang out with.  Alas, I never got the chance.  So many cool people to hang out with.  So little opportunity to do so.  But I must not wax philosophical on Wrist to Forehead Sunday.

Looks sexy and mysterious, no?

After Strangers and dinner (roasted eggplant, yum!), we decided on A Perfect Murder, a rather stylish tale of suspense. So we have had two movies involving murder, and neither were mystery but were fine stories of suspense.  What direction shall we go in next?  The same?  Different?  Murder suspense, murder mystery, or maybe my original choice, monster?  Last night we opted for suspense noir, with Sudden Fear.  Joan Crawford and Gloria Grahame, what’s not to like?

“So pleased to meet you. Which of us will kill the other?”

You can’t see Gloria Grahame so good in this picture, but it’s a nice shot of Crawford and of the other point in the triangle, Jack Palance.  I confess to not being a particular fan of Palance, but that is not important now.  What is important now is that I am over 250 words on my blog post.  Quite respectable for a Wrist to Forehead Sunday post.  I must get on with fixing my husband some dessert.

 

Slacker Saturday, But Let’s Have Some Champagne.

Well, no Saturday Running Commentary, because I didn’t run; no Scattered Saturday, because I didn’t do a whole lot; no Slacker Saturday, because I at least did a little something; no Saturday Supper, because, oh I just don’t feel like retailing that whole thing I put together for our evening meal.  I guess maybe it is a Slacker Saturday, though, at least blog-wise.  Oh, who am I kidding?  I did a little something but it was certainly little enough to make a Slacker Saturday post perfectly eligible.

The weather was supposed to be a whole lot worse than it actually was. It was bad enough to keep me close to home.  I did venture out to do some grocery shopping, but I did not patronize a distinctive local store such as I love to highlight in this space.

I also ventured out to Valley Wine and Liquor in Herkimer for a Korbel and Chambord tasting.  That is, Korbel Champagne and Chambord Raspberry Liquor, mixed together.  I also tasted the champagne by itself.  It was Brut, which is dry, which is what I like.  I bought some.  Steven and I may mimose tomorrow.  We already have some orange juice in the fridge.  Or I may just sip it from a flute.  I love sipping champagne from a champagne flute.

We are currently watching Deadly Women, an ID (Investigation Discover) original series, On Demand.  It is sufficiently cheesy to be appropriate for a Slacker Saturday.  I would like to watch a movie next. I wonder if we could find something suitable to write tomorrow’s blog post about.  Time will tell.  In the meantime, I hope you are having a lovely weekend.

 

 

A Dog? Oh Boy!

It’s that awkward moment when you are about to write your blog post about one thing, then you think you ought to start with something else, and then you want to go another way.  Oh!  I just remembered:  it is Non-Sequitur Thursday!  Perfect!

The main thing I wanted to write about was this great dog Steven and I just met.  I mean, I wanted to plug a fundraiser.  You see, I had volunteered to donate one of my afghans to a fundraiser I had heard of.  The main reason I heard about it was that music will be provided by The Posers, one of my favorite local bands.  I have been messaging with a lady on Facebook about where to drop it off.  Today Steven and I wanted to go to dinner (we were given a gift card — thanks,Mom and Dad!), so I messaged that we would stop by after that.   The lady messaged back that it would be OK, the band would be practicing around 7, and there was a very friendly dog.  A dog?  Oh boy!

We had a little trouble finding the house (we’re not good at Ilion).  As I was walking toward the house, the lady came out, to save me a few steps.

“We were hoping to meet the dog,” I said.

“That can be arranged,” she answered.

What a nice dog!  He is a Springer Spaniel named Bruce Springersteen.  How cool is that?  We petted him and told him what a good boy he was.  So we were happy we had dropped the afghan off today.

Oh yes, to plug the fundraiser:  Team Rebecca’s Annual Fundraiser, for American Heart Association’s Greatest Heart Run and Walk, Saturday, Feb. 10, 6 p.m., Crowley-Barnum American Legion Post 25, 43 W.  Main St., Mohawk, NY.

Well, that was only a couple of directions.  I was also going to talk about the dinner we had, as well as a couple of other dinners we’ve had recently.  However, you can only have so much blog on Non-Sequitur Thursday.

 

Wordless Wednesday with Love

I would really like to get back into making more “real” posts (although some of my readers seem to like the foolish ones) (I confess to enjoying them myself).  However, the Mohawk Valley weather conspires against me.  Wow, that makes me sound important:  the weather is purposefully doing things to keep me from having Mohawk Valley adventures.  In fact, the only adventure I was planning today was a run, about which I would write a Running Commentary post.  Instead, I spent 35 minutes shoveling the driveway (yes, I timed it, how else would I know if it could count as today’s exercise?).

Right now I am feeling a little sheepish, because I typed in the headline before beginning the post.  I see that I am not quite as wordless as I thought.  As a matter of fact, I took a further pictures of our Valentine decorations which I thought would make a good blog post.  Steven added a couple of decorations, and I had not noticed.  I will first share the original picture:

Another round of applause for Steven’s decorating prowess, please.

 

Oh, silly me, I neglected to turn on the juke box.

Did you see them?  Well, here are two close-ups:

“Wanna kiss me, duckies?” (that’s a line from a movie)

Perhaps the XOXO should be XXX, since he is next to a shot glass.

We have quite a collection of rubber duckies, acquired at various times.  Perhaps I will do a blog post on them one day.  In the meantime, I say Happy Wednesday!  The snow is supposed to stop soon.

 

It’s Not Thursday, Either

During my lunch time at work today, I sat and wrote in a letter to a friend (YES, I still hand write and snail mail letters, we’ve been over this before) about all the things I wanted to get done after work.  I did not even remember my blog post until the next paragraph.  I wrote, “Crap! I’ll never get all this stuff done!”  Boy, was I right!  I got a few things done, some working out better than others, of course.  Now I am hurrying to get my blog post done before Steven gets home.

You probably guessed this is going to be a Tired Tuesday post.

Yes, I use this one a lot. It is one of my favorites, featuring two of my favorites.

Unlike Bela, I never thought it was Friday today.  I never even got my hopes up for Wednesday!  At times like these, I remind myself that I am the one who wanted a job with weekends off.  Well, I do like my weekends off, so I will put up with Tired Tuesday and all the rest.  I only hope my blog readers will put up with me.

I am sitting on my couch, freshly showered and in sweats, half looking at my local news.  Some schools are closing for tomorrow ALREADY!  They never did that when I was a kid!  Oh dear, now I sound like a tiresome old-timer.  In the first place, who cares what I didn’t have?  Even I shouldn’t care any more, because that was then and this is now.  Times change, me, get used to it or die.

“I bid you velcome.”

And here is a picture of Bela looking decidedly more cheerful.  I see he is holding a candle.  Perhaps the winter storm heading this way hit his area first and they lost power.  Oh, I hope that does not happen to us.

This is turning into a kind of a non-sequitur post.  I am supposed to save those for Thursday.  My only excuse is, you guessed it, I’m tired!  Happy Tuesday, though.

 

Home is Where the Hearts Are

I heart my husband.

Today’s post will be long on pictures, short on words, because, well, I’m short on brain power.  I know, what a surprise.  I hope nobody has a heart attack, falls over and dies not not surprised.

Be that as it may, I thought I would share photos of the lovely Valentine’s Day decorations my dear husband, Steven, put up.  Ah, Valentine’s Day.  For years it was a sad day for me.  No card, no flowers, no candy, no love.  Poor, pitiful me.  Now I have a nice husband who decorates for the occasion.  Here is our mantle.

The photos are year round, as are a few other pieces.

As regular readers know, Halloween lasts all year at my house.

First I zoom into the center, on Stevens juke box and our dancing skeletons.  That reminds me, I need to lose some weight.  And take dancing lessons.

Doesn’t everybody have a Valentine Dinosaur?

Peewee Herman is always on our mantle.  I guess the lizard is his date.  The ghosts are also year-round friends, with different seasonal accessories.  They do make good snowmen at Christmas.

And this is the other end.

The awesome wine glass was custom painted for me by a cast member of Leading Ladies, the play I directed at Ilion Little Theatre a couple of years ago.

And isn’t this a sweet couple?

The stool usually stands near our fireplace, unless we need it for human seating.  The gorilla is a Valentine decoration I purchased at half price at Winn Dixie in Georgia.  The occasion was Steven’s birthday, so we named him Bert the Birtday Gorilla.

Dr. Seuss is good for every holiday!

Steven bought a box of Valentines to add the the festivities.  I don’t know if you can tell in the pictures that he put some on the wall.  He said most of the Valentines available had superheroes.  I’m glad he picked Dr. Seuss.

In case I forget to say it next week, Happy Valentine’s Day, everybody.

 

 

I Felt Super!

Ah ha ha!  (that was a triumphant laugh)  I went running again!  I took two days off, because it was just too cold for me, but this morning it was 30 degrees when we got up, so I said, “Hey!”

I waited a couple of hours first and ate a banana with peanut butter not quite one hour before I actually went.  It was not much above 30 by then, but I thought I could rock it.  I was right.  I ran on the sidewalk instead of the road for the most part, because it was covered with enough snow to give traction.  Sometimes I thought I saw ice underneath the snow, so I exercised caution.  My middle-aged shuffle is good for that.

I had run for a half a block before I realized it was snowing. Snow?  Oh well, I could still rock it (but not rocket, if you see what I mean).  I had on leggings, a long sleeved t-shirt, a hat and gloves.  I wished I had also worn a scarf, especially when the wind picked up.  Then again, running without a scarf, I think, “Oh, if I had a scarf to cover my cold face, how nice that would be!”  Running with a scarf, it’s, “I can’t get this damn scarf to cover my face right and now I’m fogging my glasses!”

As I ran, I thought about the blog post I would write, especially the title.  It is Superbowl Sunday.  Could I work that in?  How about alliteration on Sunday?  Then I looked around at houses, feeling happy when I saw the occasional Christmas decoration still up.  I don’t really get over my post-Christmas let-down till spring.  Sometimes it lasts till it’s time to start thinking about Halloween.  When I wasn’t looking for greenery and wreaths, I was hoping the cold air would not give me a headache.

Regarding that last sentence, it was a forlorn hope. As I type this, I’m afraid I got one and it is getting worse (remember, the more you complain, the longer God lets you live). However, I see that I am over 300 words.  Short for a Running Commentary but long enough for a Wrist to Forehead Sunday.  I shall stop blogging and nurse my headache.  But I ran for 26 minutes, the same as I ran on Thursday, and I felt pretty damn good about it. Happy Sunday, everybody.

 

Severed Head Saturday?

What can I say, I like movies where somebody loses his head.  Not ALL movies where that happens, of course.  I don’t need to see the blood spurting out or anything really disgusting like that.  I am not a fan of the graphic violence.  And I like people to get their heads chopped off for a good reason, like greed, jealousy or being blackmailed.  Come to think of it, I always prefer murder for a reason, be it a movie, novel or true crime show.  You know, not some psycho, weirdo serial killer.  But I digress.

I had started to write a cooking post for tonight, and I have a couple of local business shout-outs I could write.  But I let it go too late in the day, and I’m tired.  We are looking at a Forensic Files right now (murder for the reason of greed, but not by losing a head).  Then we will put in a movie.  My vote is for Strait Jacket. I am in a William Castle kind of a mood, and, as I said to begin with, I like movies with severed heads.

Of course, it isn’t all severed heads with Mr. Castle.

And here’s the showman himself.  I never heard what kind of lobby gimmick if any he included with this flick.  That might be a good thing to research sometime.  I wonder if anybody has written a definitive biography of William Castle.  I’ll have to check.

The caption is not a line from the movie, or even anything to do with the movie, but I kind of like it.

Of course another reason to watch Strait Jacket is the wonderful Joan Crawford.  She is very good in the part, and I have to respect an actress who takes parts in cheesy horror movies in order to keep working.  And what’s wrong with cheesy horror movies anyways?  I find them more entertaining than a lot of Oscar bait.  But that’s a whole other blog post.  Happy Saturday, everybody.