Category Archives: personal

Blame the Red Cross

I was afraid this would happen. You see, there was a blood drive at work today. I gave blood, because I wanted to save a life. And now I feel awful.

Since I was afraid of this happening, I tried to plan ahead. I tried to write something before work, so I would only have to type it in. I was even going to keep it short. It was very short. I only got to the second paragraph and ran out of steam. I couldn’t do a thing with it.

Given how tired and stupid I felt, one might have suggested I refrain from giving away a pint of blood. Given how after every time I’ve given blood in the last three years I’ve felt quite awful, one might have suggested that I refrain from giving any more away. But still, I wanted to save a life.

And now I think I am being unbearably pretentious. I saved a life today. I felt awful after doing it, but I did it anyways. Didn’t that sound smug? Oh dear, how embarrassing. I don’t mean to sound smug. I don’t mean to sound any way at all. I’m just sitting here with my head spinning (although at a slower rate than previously; these things do get better), typing away, trying to get to 200 words so I can go one more day of making a blog post.

Well, as I said parenthetically, these things do get better. Tomorrow I am going to write a good blog post! I hope somebody will still be reading.

Fence Post, Not Blog Post

Every Sunday is Wrist to Forehead Sunday. I don’t think there’s any getting away from that. In fact, today there would be every chance of my being too tired to get my wrist up to my forehead. But I am not the only tired one.

Earlier this week I wrote a post about a part of my fence being down. Today we had some great help from some awesome family members in fixing it. We tore apart the panel that had fallen. We pulled down another part that was about to fall and tore that apart. We pulled out nails and stacked broken fence pieces. We put up a new section of fence. We worked hard.

In fact, the whole thing deserves a better blog post than this. I intend to write one later in the week. For now I feel tired and grateful. Full disclosure: I am also extremely grateful that it is the Bra Off Sweats On Sit On The Couch Crocheting And Watching TV portion of the day.

Further disclosure: I was afraid this would happen. I thought to myself earlier, it would be a good idea to write a blog post early in the day BEFORE people come over to help with manual labor. Well, one does not always act on good ideas, does one?

No matter, I say. It is Sunday. I shall return to my crocheting and TV viewing, whilst I turn over in my head wonderful things I can do for the folks I am grateful to. And the better blog post I intend to write.

Into the Fog Once Again

I guess Saturday Running Commentary isn’t really back, despite its appearance last Saturday (um, I did have a Saturday Running Commentary last week, didn’t I? Too lazy to check). But to expound upon my tribulations running would be tiresome. It would no doubt lead to a big long gripe, a real Wrist to Forehead Saturday. I would run out of Saturday before I ran out of things to complain about. In fact, I’d better change the subject now.

Tabby and I took a nice walk to the post office this morning. I know I just wrote about a walk we took yesterday, but, once again, I don’t want to run out of Saturday. I have to get this puppy posted (um, “this puppy” being my blog post, not dear little Tabby).

It promised to be a warm, sunny day, so I was wearing shorts. I did not wear my crazy old lady hat, because I had just showered and my hair wasn’t dry. I was going to Coffee and Conversation with a Cop later (preview of coming attractions). I didn’t want hat head. At 8:09 a.m. (I looked at my watch as we set out), it was perhaps a little cool for shorts, but one makes do.

At first I thought Tabby did not want to go for a walk. We went about ten feet and she stopped and gave me that look. I turned around, feeling sad and a little concerned. It was neither hot nor rainy. Why would my dog not want to walk? However, she bypassed our driveway and began sniffing in the front yard. I convinced her to try the walk again, this time crossing the street. She graciously consented to continue.

It was foggy, as it has been several mornings this week. I love the fog. So mysterious. I was a little sorry, though, as I looked into the distance and could not see color on trees which I felt certain was there. Oh well, you can’t have everything. I concentrated on enjoying the mystery. I occasionally saw somebody walking up ahead. Even a block away rendered them a sinister figure. Halloween is coming. I look forward to sinister figures and various hauntings.

We made it to the post office, where I mailed some post cards, then continued our walk. We went down a mysterious alley. It wasn’t so foggy there, but the backs of some of these buildings can be a little creepy, especially if you have a vivid imagination, as I do.

However, we did not encounter anything alarming and Tabby was happy to head for home. I had things to do, so was not sorry the walk was not longer. I’m a little sorry the post is not more exciting, but as I often observe, you can’t have everything. I did have a couple of Mohawk Valley adventures today, so perhaps more exciting blog posts will be forthcoming.

Last Summer Walk?

Here’s a random observation for Lame Post Friday: “Lullaby and Good Night” does not seem to me an appropriate song for the ice cream truck (don’t know the real name of that song, sorry). But how was that for a lead sentence? I’m sitting in my living room, my little Acer in my lap, hoping to come up with something, and the silly ice cream truck is driving by.

I’m not up for any half-baked philosophy (the other component of Lame Post Friday), but I did take a nice walk with my schnoodle, Tabby, during which I made a few more observations which I will share. Summer seems to be making a farewell appearance in the Mohawk Valley. It is sunny and warm and supposed to be even better all weekend. I wore shorts, sunglasses (prescription), and my crazy old lady hat.

Tabby pulled me down East German Street for a couple of blocks. I thought it might be nice to go down Prospect, but she pulled me across the street to where the Pugnacious Pug was sitting in front of a house with his peeps. I call him the Pugnacious Pug because it seems he is always barking up a storm at something. Today he was barking at some people getting into a truck, then he turned around and barked at us. Tabby pretty much ignored him, finding several interesting places to sniff in the grass. At last I convinced her to go on.

We saw kids riding their bicycles and people sitting on front porches. We said hello to anybody who looked up. I noted some mums and other flowers still in bloom. My favorite sight was Halloween decorations. I saw one porch with a black and orange garland, small skeletons and one giant furry spider. Steven and I better get going on our decorations.

The walk was not long, but we enjoyed it. When we got home I took the laundry down off the clothesline. Astute readers may remember I wrote my Wednesday post while in the laundromat. Yes, those clothes having been hanging on my line for two days. Let’s hear it for no rain!

So I’ve walked my dog, taken down laundry, and typed in my blog post. Once I hit publish, I’m starting my weekend. Hope your Friday is fun.

Too Tired to be Inspired

I’ve been waiting all day for inspiration to strike and give me an idea of what to write a blog post about. All that has happened is that I feel increasingly tired and dull. I can see some of you shaking your heads now; you saw that coming, you TOLD me not to wait for inspiration, just to write, blah blah blah.

Regular readers know I DON’T always wait for inspiration. I daresay some of them wish I did, maybe I would write less nonsense. I can’t say I wouldn’t write anything at all, because I do feel inspired sometimes. Sometimes I feel inspired to write nonsense (ooh, that might make a good title).

I had thought to write a Pedestrian Post so took my schnoodle, Tabby, for a walk. It’s not that I’m not inspired to write about that. It’s more of a case of I Can’t Write About THAT. Oh dear, I hope that hasn’t got everybody wondering what could have possibly happened that I can’t write about it. Nothing that exciting, I’m afraid.

Some days ago I made two salads, which I thought would be good for a cooking post. When I started writing that one in my head I realized not so much. Note to self: Next time make salads with more ingredients.

I am looking forward to the upcoming weekend. But I don’t want to do a Preview of Coming Attractions without looking up more information about locations and times. I mean, what’s the point in writing about a future event that my local readers can’t take advantage of?

Ah, I just thought of a topic to use in a future blog post: Is it really such a bad thing to end a sentence with a preposition? Or a blog post with a question? Discuss amongst yourselves.

In the meantime, I’m going to publish this as a Non-Sequitur Thursday.

My Interrupted Kiss

So there I was, on a break at work, writing on my novel. I’ve been having the darnedest time lately coming up with scenes to write. At last I just started something. As sometimes happens (and it’s GREAT when it does), I went on from there.

OF COURSE the Get Back to Work buzzer sounded just when it was starting to get good. Two characters were right in the middle of a kiss (no, it’s not a sex book; don’t get your hopes up) (you know who you are). I don’t write books about thinly disguised versions of myself and others, but I felt rather as if it was my lips that had been interrupted.

Naturally I went back to work, however ill-used I felt to be doing so. One must keep one’s job, after all (if anyone says, “Don’t quit your day job,” I’ll scream. I HATE that joke) (EEEEEEEE! I just knew somebody was going to). I suppose it’s just as well. I was not at all sure how I wanted that scene to progress.

On subsequent breaks I managed a few more sentences. Then a few more after work at the laundromat, where I am now, as I write this. As you may have guessed, the scene ceased to progress.

It raises the writerly question: if I had been able to continue instead of being interrupted the first time, would the scene have progressed differently? As I said, I was not sure how I wanted the scene to go, but if I had kept writing, maybe I would have figured it out. I guess we’ll never know.

Does it matter? Perhaps not. But I thought it might be something to write a blog post about on Wuss-out Wednesday.

Please, Fence Me In

I thought I was off on a Mohawk Valley adventure on Saturday when I left the house bound for New Hartford, NY. I’m afraid it turned out… not so much. But I will attempt to write about it nevertheless, just to avoid Yet Another Post About Why I Can’t Write a Post.

I was delayed by a minor homeowner’s disaster: a section of my fence was down. A brief explanation about the fence: It’s been pretty crappy since we moved in. We didn’t think it was ours, because the smooth side was in. Turns out the previous homeowner put it up backwards. Ah, the things you learn. A few years ago my father, mother and sister came over and helped us replace one post and nail up some boards which had fallen. I’ve spent every winter since living in fear that it would fall on the one of the neighbors’ cars.

So it was not entirely unexpected that a section was down. But it sure wasn’t what I was in the mood to see. It was dangling, still caught on part of the fence left standing. It obtruded into the neighbors’ driveway in a most inconvenient fashion. I thought I had better do something about it. I tugged and pulled and pulled and tugged. Tried pushing with no more success. At last it fell off the still upright portion. With my meager strength I could not move it further into our yard, but at least the neighbors could drive around it to get in and out of their parking lot. I cravenly went to New Hartford.

I did part of what I set out to do in New Hartford, as I said, nothing very adventurous. I thought I should hurry to be back home by 12:30, when Steven was expected for lunch. I hurried, while still following the posted speed limits. When I got home Steven was already home, pulling at the fallen fence section with more effect than I had. I ran to help and we got the damn thing on our own yard. Phew!

Tune in next week for a riveting blog post on What We Did to Fix the Fence (um, we probably won’t use rivets. I was speaking figuratively).

Fool for Thought

Wrist to Forehead Sunday morphs painfully into Middle-aged Musings Monday. Well, I’m still middle-aged, but I don’t have any musings. Instead I have a bad case of “I Can’t Write About THAT!” It is paralyzing.

Ah, but perhaps I could go on for a paragraph or two about the feeling that one “can’t” write about something.

Some writers feel you should be able to write about anything at any time. We won’t deal with those annoying overachievers (and they are mostly “do as I say, not as I do” anyways). However, there is also the school of thought that the things you find scary to write about are the very things you ought to be writing about. That is where your passion and your energies lie.

Perhaps it is so. Perhaps if I wrote about my innermost thoughts and feelings I would come up with something really powerful and moving. Or I might just sound like a fool. Oh wait, I do that anyways (some of you were about to say that, if you didn’t actually beat me to it)(you know who you are).

Another school of thought says you must wait until you are ready to write about some things. Ernest Hemingway deals with this school of thought in A Moveable Feast. Only I can’t remember quite how he puts it and I’ve lost my copy of the book (yes, here’s the part where I sound like a fool). Something to the effect that he can write about this other place when he is in Paris and later on he will be able to write about Paris (yes, I did sound like a fool. Damn).

I’m afraid my reasons for not wanting to write about the things I’m not writing about today are not so writerly (I’m sure that is a word, although my computer says not). I don’t want to write about the things I mentioned earlier because, well, quite frankly, I’m afraid they would be boring. Or tiresome. Or stupid.

Oh dear, I hope what I did write was not boring, tiresome or stupid. It was foolish, you say? Oh well, I guess I can live with that.

What Is This Thing You Call Subtance?

And what’s wrong with Wrist to Forehead Sunday anyways, I’d like to know. Why shouldn’t I spend one day distressing over the fact that I can’t write a post? Oh, I know. In the first place, I know that there are many days when I have a hard time writing a post, not just once a week. And I know that SOME bloggers are able to write posts of substance every time they choose to sit down at the keyboard (and I would be happy to be directed to any of those lucky bums’ websites) (I don’t imagine I would be able to follow their good example, but I would SO admire to see it).

I can’t say it is a really distressful day, actually. I woke up with a headache, which of course is never pleasant. However, I took my dog for a walk, did the dishes and made two salads. How’s that for productive? I’ve been re-reading an Agatha Christie murder mystery. That is pleasant and educational. You can learn a lot about plotting and hiding clues by re-reading the masters.

Have I done any writing this weekend? Um, that is kind of an awkward question. Have I had any Mohawk Valley adventures that I could write posts about in the upcoming week? Mmmmm… still awkward. Can I offer any justification to my continued use of oxygen on this planet? Ah, a half-baked philosophical question worthy of Lame Post Friday!

In fact, it seems I cling to my Wrist to Forehead Sunday even more than my Lame Post Friday. Is the angst of the end of the weekend more powerful than the exuberance of the beginning of same? More half-baked philosophy to consider.

However, I see than I am over 200 words. I shall return to enjoying the end of my weekend (really, I strive to savor every minute) (I get some enjoyment out of the week, too, never fear). I look forward to a delightful upcoming week when PERHAPS I will come up with more posts of this so-called substance.

I hope you are all enjoying your Sunday.

Never Mind Those Petty Complaints!

Saturday Running Commentary is BACK! Yes! I ran this morning! It was awesome!

OK, it wasn’t really awesome, but it didn’t suck. That puts it in the Win column. I got up around 5:30, when I had expected to sleep in till six. I hadn’t put out running clothes but I knew right where they were. I got into them and out the door before I could talk myself out of it.

I wore my reflective vest, because sunrise wasn’t for another hour. I had on shorts and t-shirt, because my thermostat said it was 51 degrees outside. Just a couple of days ago we had frost warnings, but you’ll have that this time of year. Off I went. It didn’t feel too cold. I headed down German Street. It was the direction I most often take, but I reflected that it couldn’t feel too familiar since I had not been running in almost two weeks (HAS it been that long? I am not inclined to look at a calendar and figure it out).

The nice thing about returning to running is that you can do a short, easy run and not feel guilty about it. I know, some of you probably think I should feel guilty about returning to running and not keeping it up to begin with. I maintain that regret is a colossal waste of time. I was not there to worry about the past! I was there to further my weight-loss goals and perhaps get a blog post out of it.

And my legs were not happy with me. They have felt rather awful lately. When I took Tabby for a walk last night all my legs wanted to do was stretch out along the couch or bed and lie still. I kept it up for a decent amount of time anyways. It didn’t kill me.

I got near Valley Health and considered running up the hill. I decided against it. I would keep going for at least 20 minutes but not necessarily try for over 30. I had been running between 33 and 38 minutes the last few times I ran but I was doing the begin again thing this morning. Also, I intended to take at least one good long walk with Tabby later, so I would be getting some exercise.

About ten minutes into the run, my legs started to feel not so bad. They still weren’t happy with me, but at least they were less vocal in their complaints. I told myself I could rock this, but it was more intellectual knowledge than physical confidence. Still, I kept going and that’s the important thing.

I noticed more houses with lights on than I usually see at 3:30 in the morning, so that was nice. Still a lot of dark windows. Lucky bums sleeping in. I turned down Prospect Street rather than going to Main. I’ve mentioned Main Street’s “reputation.” I’ve never encountered anything untoward during daylight hours, though, so I will probably run down it in the dark one day soon, just to feel bad-ass.

I saw a person up ahead of me pushing a grocery cart. What was that all about? Maybe some homeless person collecting bottles and cans? He crossed the street and I thought I saw him head towards somebody’s trash can. I didn’t look too closely. I don’t need to get into a fight with a guy pushing a shopping cart. I turned down the first side street I came to. That worked out, because I entered where a sign said, “Do Not Enter.” You know how I love to be a rebel.

A glance at my watch told me I would not surpass 20 minutes if I went home from here, so I went by my street and on for a couple more blocks. I heard voices before I turned left. Who was that? Three young kids walking down the street. How to feel middle-aged and dumb: run on the sidewalk in a reflective vest while three kids (they might have been teenagers or early 20s) walk down the middle of the road three abreast wearing dark clothes. They ignored me, to which I did not take offense.

I ended up running for 26 minutes. The cool down walk around the block with Tabby felt better than the run, but my legs complained about that, too. Yes, I said they stopped complaining but neglected to mention when they started up again. I guess there’s no point in paying too much attention to petty complaints.