Tag Archives: not writing

More Murder and Mayhem!

Posted on March 23, 2018 by mohawkvalleygirl

I believe I have mentioned that I have another murder mystery to write.  I may also have mentioned (once or twice) that I have been having trouble writing ANYTHING lately.  Well, just now I surprised myself.  I wrote a brief overview of said mystery, to send to the venue for publicity purposes.  The venue is Morning Star Methodist Church in Ilion, NY, and the performance date is Saturday, April 28, 2018.  They are serving a roast pork dinner, which was quite delicious when we performed there last year and the year before.

So I have been writing this mystery in bits and pieces, and second guessing myself about everything.  I tried writing the overview twice on breaks at work today, to no avail.  Finally I sat down at my laptop and said, “Well, I’ve got to do this now.”  And here is what I wrote:

Spring into Murder takes place at the kick-off dinner for the Tulip Festival sponsored by Two Lips Cosmetics. The founder and CEO of the company loves everything to do with The Netherlands, so much so that she changed her first name to Holland and hired a bodyguard named Dutch. On the agenda for tonight is the unveiling of the spring line of lipstick colors, to be modeled by Holland’s spokesmodel and partner, the beautiful Ariel Angelica. Holland is accompanied by her new husband, Rod. Also on hand are Holland’s nephew Benedict and recently adopted daughter Windy, as well as the designer of this year’s colors, the brilliant if eccentric Giselle Ellison.

Unfortunately, all is not beauty and harmony at Two Lips Cosmetics. Rumor has it that Holland did not want to take on Ariel as a partner, that Benedict wanted Windy to be the spokesmodel, that Giselle feels badly paid for her work, and nobody knows quite what to think of Dutch. Additionally, we don’t know who sent Ariel a bouquet of BLACK tulips!
There may be murder before the night is out! Who will solve the crime?

I was rather pleased with it myself.  The new husband got his name as I wrote it, and Giselle Ellison (my part) changed from a dedicated secretary to a lipstick designer.  I think diva is much more fun than downtrodden.

Having written that much, I feel fired up to get the whole thing done.  I’ll share more information about the performance — times and prices — when I know more.

 

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A Blog to No Where

Posted on March 21, 2018 by mohawkvalleygirl

Can my readers bear yet another post about How I Can’t Write a Post Today.  I can’t write ANYTHING today!  And it has been that way for a very long time.

OK, that is an exaggeration.  I can write something.  Here I am, typing in nonsense I intend to pass off as a blog post.  Sunday I wrote two articles to submit to Mohawk Valley Living magazine.  I wonder if they were any good.  I can’t worry about that now.  Where was I?  Nowhere, it seems.

Now I am sitting here staring at the word “nowhere.”  My computer is not underlining it, but it looks wrong.  Like it really says “now here.”  These are the things that keep me from moving on to the next paragraph.

The next project I am dithering about is the murder mystery for Morning Star Methodist Church in Ilion, NY, planned for Saturday, April 28.  I think I have a situation, and the names of some of the characters.  I have a victim but not yet a murderer.  This is not uncommon.  Sometimes I write the whole script before I decide whodunnit.  You can do that with a ten-page script.  I wouldn’t try it with a 300-page novel.  No, I have not written a 300-page novel, but I have written 300 pages on a novel.  At least a couple of times.

And now I have written a 200 word blog post.  It looks kind of sad without any pictures of monsters.  Maybe I could include just one.

“Where have you been all my life?”

There you go:  a monster and a beautiful girl.  What’s not to like?  Oh, I’m sure somebody could find something. Once again, I’ll try for a better blog post tomorrow.

 

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A Monstrous Monday

Posted on March 20, 2018 by mohawkvalleygirl

I am sitting on my couch, laptop on my lap (good place for it), typing in words and backspacing them out.  This is not a good start to my blogging week.  Darn it, I’m tired!  I had a marvelous time at the Crusader’s Wine Tasting yesterday, and I worked ten hours today, got my articles for next month’s Mohawk Valley Living magazine submitted…  OK, I have no excuse.  Well, this is going to be a Monday Mental Meanderings post.  Maybe I should add a few monsters.  As regular readers know, I like monsters.

“Is this where the water aerobics class meets?”

I haven’t shared the Creature from the Black Lagoon in a while.  I think it’s kind of sad he doesn’t have a real name.  Do you suppose his friends call him Blackie?  Maybe ‘Goon?  Or Creach?  These are the things I think about when I am supposed to be writing a blog post.

“I told him not to lose his head.”

As I was searching my Media Library for Creach, I noticed this lovely shot of Peter Lorre and Vincent Price.  I decided to include it under the contention that people are the real monsters.  That is definitely an argument one can make.  In fact, as I typed that in, I overheard somebody on Snapped call the murderess a monster.  I would really like to finish this blog post so I can watch the next episode of that show, by the way.

Did she reach her breaking point? Or is she just a monster?

 

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I Might Actually Swoon This Time

Posted on March 12, 2018 by mohawkvalleygirl

Oh, it is late for me to be posting on a Sunday, even a Wrist to Forehead Sunday, which this definitely is.  Alas!  Alack!  Oh woe is me!  Yes, I am being dramatic.  We’ve discussed this.  It is what I do.

Earlier we had another rehearsal for Secrets at Suiter House, the murder mystery we are doing to benefit the Herkimer County Historical Society.  Before that, Steven and I were at a Chinese Auction to benefit H.A.L.O., the cat rescue organization. I donated an afghan.  We won a basket of beanie babies.  Fun times!  Earlier yet, we had breakfast at The Knight Spot in Frankfort.

So you see, I have a number of topics for a real post.  Can I manage to write one.  NO!  That is why I am poised, the back of my wrist against my forehead, about to swoon in anguish.  If only I had a chaise lounge to swoon upon, my life would be perfect.  Instead I shall have to make do with a couch.  It is almost impossible to type while holding that about-to-swoon pose, and even more so when one is actually swooning.  Oh, OK, I will admit it:  I have never actually swooned.  I don’t even usually make the about-to-swoon pose. Yes, wrist to forehead is just an expression.

“Real post”  is just an expression, too.  I am going to hit “Publish.” Some people might read this nonsense.  If so, I hope they find some amount of entertainment from it.  As for me, I shall try for a better blog post tomorrow. Happy Sunday, folks.  

 

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A Monster and a Mermaid on Non-Sequitur Thursday

Posted on March 9, 2018 by mohawkvalleygirl

I am in a blogging slump, as you may have noticed.  I managed a real post yesterday, but all I want to do today is share monster pictures and type nonsense.

Actually, that is not quite true.  What I REALLY want to do is  sit on my couch, crochet an afghan, and watch 20/20 on OWN.  Maybe drink a little wine.  Hang out with my husband.  Vegetate.  But I am determined to continue this silly blog as long as possible.  There may come a day when I no longer write a daily blog, but THIS!   IS!   NOT!  THAT!   DAY!

As you can see, I feel strongly about it.

Me, waiting for inspiration to strike.

Obviously, this is not me.  I will never stay on the South Beach Diet long enough to reach this level of skinniness.  But you understand my metaphor:  waiting for inspiration is a long, dry wait.  I don’t really wait for inspiration to strike, anyways, so don’t start in on the lectures about Just Write, Don’t Wait for Mood, and other truisms of writing advice.  And yes, I KNOW that part of the word “truism” is “true.”  Things often become a cliche for a reason, etc., etc.

Incidentally, the above picture is from the Old Barn Marketplace on Route 5 in Little Falls.  I was there last fall and took that picture.

Where was I?  Ah yes, trying to come up with a blog post for Non-Sequitur Thursday, so I can stay in the blogging game for yet another day.  I did say something about monster pictures…

“Where did you come from, Tall, Dark and Gruesome?”

Ah, here is a monster and a mermaid (that might be a good title), and a mention of what day it is.  Thirsty Thursday, huh?  I did say something about wine earlier.  And I am up to 300 words.  I call that respectable.  I hope to see you all on Lame Post Friday.

 

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I Did Not Plan to be Tired

Posted on March 7, 2018 by mohawkvalleygirl

Regular readers know that I am almost always tired on Tuesday, hence the Tired Tuesday post.  Today was even worse, because being the first day back at work after a four day break, it was also my Monday.  I feel guilty complaining about it.  I am sure many will judge me:  you had four days off, you bum!  What have you got to be tired about?  Well, I am definitely too tired to have THAT argument in my head again.

My day was brightened somewhat this morning when I realized it was, in fact, Tuesday, meaning I only have a four day week.  I enjoyed my four day week last week.  Perhaps I could do the same this week.  One thing I was resolved on:  I was going to handwrite a blog post during breaks so that I could go to the library after work and make my blog post on a real computer, not my Tablet.  Additionally, I could easily check all my emails (I have a few different accounts), at least one of which I had to answer.  Oh, and Facebook message a cast member of Secrets at Suiter House.  Just to show you what a full plate I had.

Naturally, things did not go as I planned.  They never do; I’m not even sure why I bother to make plans, but never mind that now.  First, I was too tired to write anything.  Then I got a message from my husband, Steven, that the laptop was ready for pick up TODAY, not Friday as scheduled.  It obviously behooved me to call and change my pick-up appointment to today, and to drive to New Hartford (NY, not CT), and get the laptop.  Then I could skip the library.  Although, now that I think about it:  the library is closer, and I could have gotten out more books.  I like books.

Of course it took longer than expected to accomplish this, and traffic is often a problem in that area.  However, I mustered what patience I could, and now I am sitting on my couch, typing my blog post into the laptop. I checked my email, answered what I needed to, sent the message I wanted to, and even looked at Facebook for a bit (don’t judge me).

I’m thinking this is a foolish post, even for a Tired Tuesday.  There are a lot more interesting things I could write about than my stupid computer problems.  If only I wasn’t so tired!  Let that be a lesson to me —  oh wait, this is a lesson I have told myself many times and I haven’t learned it yet:  Have blog posts written in advance, so in case of just such an emergency, I will have only to hit Publish.  Waaaait a minute!  That sounds suspiciously like Plan Ahead.  What did I say earlier about making plans?

 

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Here’s Yesterday’s Post

Posted on February 14, 2018 by mohawkvalleygirl

Yesterday I took a bloggers’ sick day.  It is now 4:27 in the morning and I am going to publish something, as has been my habit at these times.  As I lay in bed earlier this morning, I composed in my head a much better post than what I am now typing.  I can see some of you shaking your fingers or your heads at me, saying, “THAT is why you must always keep a notebook and pen by your bed!”

Frankly, I am not too regretful about it.  For one reason, waking up sufficiently to write something down would have woken me up for the day, and I certainly need my beauty sleep.  For another reason, it was probably only better in my head.  Any time I dream a “perfect” idea for a novel, I find on waking that it made much more sense in the dream.  Anything I thought of in the night, rolled over and wrote down, I later thought, “Why did I bother?”

Be all that as it may, here is what I typed in last night (as Truman Capote once said, “That’s not writing, that’s typing), before I found myself quite incapable of typing another word:

I think this post is going to be time-stamped Valentine’s Day, but as I type this, it is Feb. 13. I just returned from Little Falls, NY.  I went to Huckleberry Letterpress Co.  to purchase a Valentine for Steven.  I felt very fortunate when I saw on their Facebook page that they were open at the beginning of the week for Valentine’s shopping.  Now I feel bad that I did not plug them yesterday, so local readers may have had a chance to go there today.  No matter.  You can go there another day to get a different kind of card.  They have an excellent selection.

I wrote about Huckleberry Letterpress for the February issue of Mohawk Valley Living magazine.  They were also featured on the Sunday Mohawk Valley Living TV show.

(Back to present time): I decided to share those paragraphs, because, you know, waste not, want not (ooh, I do remember thinking, “waste not, want not” earlier, that was worth remembering).  Also, I had linked to the shop and the magazine.

After I typed in what I could, I felt really bad for not doing more for Valentine’s Day for my husband (I had declared we would celebrate it on Fat Tuesday, because Steven works later today), so I bestirred myself to go out to the kitchen and bake brownies.  I used a mix and added chocolate chips.  Steven liked them, and he liked the card.

So I guess this is yesterday’s post.  I see it is clocking in over 450 words. Yay me.  Kind of.  Happy Valentine’s Day.

 

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Am I Write?

Posted on February 13, 2018 by mohawkvalleygirl

I always say writing begets writing.  The more you write, the more you will write.  Having typed in those two sentences, I sit here, typing in a third sentence and backspacing it out, several times, because it is a cliche, or because it is not quite what I wanted to say, or, oh well, any of the many reasons one decides to unwrite what one has written.

What I’m trying to say is, I have been writing since I got home from work and I’m tired.  On the brighter side, I finished and emailed two articles to Mohawk Valley Living magazine.  On the duller side, I am just barely ahead of deadline, and I had faithfully promised to do better this month.  In my defense, it cannot be denied that shit happens.

So this is a Monday Mental Meanderings post, and I guess my thoughts are indeed meandering.  This is what happens when one writes a daily blog and one clearly does not write enough.  If I wrote enough, I would have at least a couple of extra posts hanging around somewhere, just waiting for me to hit Publish.  Well, one cannot live one’s life on “if.”  What is that nursery rhyme: If wishes were horses, beggars would ride.

Then again (see how I argue with myself?) what is a fiction writer (which I sometimes am) but somebody who continually asks and answers the question, “What if?”  What if several people all wanted a guy dead, and then he dropped dead?  That is the plot of most of my murder mysteries.  Oh that reminds me, I have to finish my script for Secrets at Suiter House, the murder mystery I am writing for Herkimer County Historical Society.  I’ll keep you posted on how that goes.

 

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Don’t Despair: Just Write the Post!

Posted on February 1, 2018 by mohawkvalleygirl

This is the kind of nonsense in which I indulge on Facebook lately.  The first I originally typed into this space, then thought, “I can’t start a blog post with this!”  So I moved it to Facebook.  Now I put it back here, just to be that way:

I can’t do it.  I can’t write a blog post about Why I Can’t Write a Blog Post.  And, I can’t write a blog post.

Then I remembered something I had meant to post in my pun group, Punmanship: A Salute to Bennett Cerf and other inveterate punsters.  It is a true story:

I said I would throw my hands up in despair, and my husband said he would like to see that. When I did, he said it did not look like despair. I said, “It was dis pair of hands!” The fact that he laughed explains our long and happy marriage.

Well, that got me up to 15o words anyways.  My choices now are:  (1) make a really short post; (2) throw in a picture or two and get silly; (3) never mind what choice #3 is, I’m going to add pictures and get silly.

Alas, Frangelica, we never knew ya!

Never mind what this originally represented:  these are all players in the murder mystery I am writing for a fundraiser for the Herkimer County Historical Society on March 31.  I worked a little more on it today but have far to go.  I shall give further updates as events warrant.

The Suiter House, home of the Herkimer County Historical Society.

Since the plot of the murder mystery centers around an upcoming exhibit at the Historical Society, I include a picture of The Suiter House. The mystery’s title is Secrets at Suiter House.  I believe I wrote a blog post about that.

Ooh, look at that:  I am up to 300 words.  I guess I could write a blog post after all.

 

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Bette and Joan on Tired Tuesday

Posted on January 17, 2018 by mohawkvalleygirl

I’ve got the I CAN’T POST THAT disease,  also known as the Type It In Backspace It Out disease.

They look how I feel.

When in doubt, post a picture.  I confess to not being a great fan of Whatever Happened to Baby Jane? although I adore both Bette Davis and Joan Crawford, as well as old horror movies.  You may ask me, what’s that all about? But I will not have a good answer.  After all, one can’t like everything.

“I can just about spit in your eye!”

I may not have that quote right, but here is Davis in a movie I thoroughly enjoy, Hush… Hush, Sweet Charlotte, which ironically enough (given my enjoyment of one and dislike of the other) was originally titled Whatever Happened to Cousin Charlotte?  I read all about it in a wonderful book called The Divine Feud by Shaun Considine.  Ooh, now I should find a picture of Crawford in a movie I like, preferably horror.  How about Straitjacket?

The caption is not a line from the movie. Also, Miss Crawford did not appreciate being referred to as a “broad.”

I may flatter myself, but I think this is turning out to be a not bad silly post. I haven’t even mentioned my headache (that was one of the lines I typed in and backspaced out, as mentioned earlier) (oops.  Well, go ahead and judge me for whining).  I’ll keep it short and end with another favorite picture.

She really lost her head over that movie.

Happy Tuesday, everybody.

 

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