Category Archives: personal

I Say: Better than Whiskey

OK, so we’re all agreed that it’s all right if I do foolish posts till the play is over on Sunday. Um, I may also need Monday to recover from the cast party. In any case, today is Lame Post Friday, so we knew I wouldn’t be sweating it too much if today is, well, lame.

I had hoped for a marginally non-lame post. I thought I might do a minor preview of coming attractions, especially since I am planning to have at least one Mohawk Valley adventure tomorrow before the play. This quickly became a source of stress to me when I realized that although I plan to have an adventure, I do not actually have an adventure planned. How about a little half-baked philosophy about that?

Sometimes the best adventures are unplanned. I can’t think of an example offhand, but I’m sure that is a well-known contention, beloved by many. Or is it just a rationalization for people who have not planned? How many times have you said, “Well, that was an adventure,” just to make yourself feel better? Oh, I suppose YOU never did (you know who you are). I’m not talking to you.

And here is another half-baked philosophical question: Why are some people so down on rationalizations when sometimes they make you feel so much better? Aren’t mental gymnastics better than drugs? Shall I rationalize that faux pas or just have a shot of whiskey? MMmmm… whiskey. Better not have any of that before tonight’s performance.

For local readers I will just repeat: it’s Busybody at Ilion Little Theatre, Ilion, NY. Click on the link for more information (I was so proud of myself when I learned how to make a link). And happy Friday, everyone.

Not Writer’s Block

It is not Writer’s Block. It is not Writer’s Blank. It is not Writer’s Anything! It is I Can’t Write Anymore!

I suppose I just proved myself wrong with that last paragraph, because, you know, I wrote it. But perhaps I have proven myself right with some of my previous posts (Only SOME? the inner critic carps).

That is what I wrote while at work today. And there did not seem to be much more to say. Then I came home, got on the computer, and read the nice comments on yesterday’s Wuss-out Wednesday post. Surely I was selling myself short and I could write a much better post. I WOULD write a better post! But I did not.

What I did instead was to go upstairs, get on the desktop (I’m on my little ACER now) and type in what I had written previously for an article to submit to Mohawk Valley Living magazine. It is about the play I keep using as an excuse or more accurately the reason for my skimpy posts. I did not just type in what I wrote. I re-wrote the lead, I rearranged the paragraphs, I edited what was there, I added more stuff.

Yeah! I WROTE!

So this is my Non-Sequitur Thursday post about writing. It was going to be a post about not writing, but then I wrote. I feel not displeased with myself. I hope to see you all on Lame Post Friday.

Pick-up on a Wednesday Night

I did try to avoid a Wuss-out Wednesday, I really did. I bet some readers don’t believe me. Well, I’m sorry. I think I just have to realize I’m going to have a bad proportion of ridiculous posts till this play is over.

We had our pick-up rehearsal tonight. Pick-up rehearsals are usually fun, because you don’t put on costumes or act full-out. For the pick-up rehearsal for Harvey, we just sat in the lobby of the theatre and said our lines. Tonight we were on the stage and did all the usual movements, and some acting. Some lines we just kind of said, then moved on. A couple of times we didn’t say the right lines (I say it with a sheepish smile).

I wanted to make my blog post before rehearsal. In fact, I wanted to write it at work. I think I wrote two sentences. Oh wait, one sentence (I just checked). Then I felt I should study my lines. And (full disclosure) I worked on a cryptogram puzzle (don’t judge). I had some time before rehearsal, but I sat in front of a blank screen with a little voice in my head screaming, “I CAN’T do this!”

Now I’m sitting here, typing away, and realizing I still don’t have much to say. That’s why this is Wuss-out Wednesday. I’m going to stop typing now and see what tomorrow will bring.

At Least My Afghan Will Help

Hands up, anybody who thought today was not going to be a Tired Tuesday post. Keep your hands up while I ask for hands up all of you who are disappointed.

In my defense, I’m sad. This is a totally fun blog (see subhead). I can’t write about being sad. For another reason, I have nothing wise and insightful to say. And I don’t want to come across as if I’m saying, “Look how compassionate and thoughtful I am, feeling all sad and stuff. I’m deep.” “Yeah,” my readers will say, “something is getting deep around here.”

But I will share the reason for my sadness. A few days ago at work I noticed a flier about one of those fundraisers for a cancer patient. This was for the wife of a co-worker. I don’t really know the co-worker and have never met his wife, but when I see one of these fliers, if they have contact information, I like to donate an afghan for the Chinese auction (these fundraisers almost always include a Chinese auction).

Regular readers will know I make afghans regularly as I watch TV, which I may or may not watch too much of (don’t judge). Sometimes they pile up, and I like to donate them. The flier I saw mentioned two names of heat treat workers I know (heat treat is a department at my work). I approached the one on day shift, she gracefully accepted my offer, and I brought the afghan in today. Anyone who saw it said it was pretty.

Shortly after lunch, we heard that the co-worker’s wife had died. I don’t think anybody realized how short her time was, perhaps not even the doctors. We were all sad. Four different people told me the poor woman had died. I would rather that than not being told, but I felt more sad each time.

The fundraiser will still be held, because there are still expenses to be defrayed. My contribution will help with those, so I am glad I brought the afghan in. But I am sad and have nothing profound to say about it. But here is my Tired Tuesday blog post.

Monday Misadventure

Hands up, whoever thought that with the play in production I would immediately return to making “real” posts? Heads down in shame, all of you who are pointing and laughing because you knew darn well I would not. I don’t mean you should feel ashamed because I am about to do a brilliant post about a Mohawk Valley adventure. I just don’t like it when people point and laugh.

I had thought to do a Middle-aged Musings Monday today, but a considerate co-worker brought me a copy of the new issue of Mohawk Valley Living, and I spent my lunch hour reading that instead of writing a blog post. I will instead type in a few words about the bad weather adventure I had after work today. By adventure, I’m afraid I mean misadventure.

The Mohawk Valley is having a winter storm, as is much of the northeast. It is cold and has been snowing like a sonofabitch all day (I love to say things are doing something like a sonofabitch). I suppose this made a bit of a change from the straight cold weather we have been having, but perhaps I am being too glass-half-full.

My misadventure began, as many of my misadventures do, with me thinking I am being clever. I left work and drove to my husband’s place of employment, to switch vehicles. This meant my SUV would be last in the driveway tomorrow morning, when I leave for work prior to 5 a.m. It further meant that Steven would have the 4-wheel drive for coming home after 6 p.m. After all, it was continuing to snow.

I could get the little old Stratus into the driveway. Just swing wide and power it through, right? Turns out, not so much. In my defense, I have not driven a vehicle this size since 1989, when I had a 10-year-old Pinto I fondly called Feather Car. Of course I got hung up at the end of the driveway. I felt I had a small blessing in that the car was completely out of the road at least. I turned it off, got out and grabbed a shovel.

I shoveled, tried to move the car, repeat. Things were not going well. I thought a good push would help. But there was only one of me. Then I saw my across the street neighbor shoveling his own driveway. He is a strapping young man, and a very nice one. I went over and asked his help. I wanted to ask him to drive the car while I pushed, because it is my car after all, but that seemed a little silly given our relative sizes.

He told me to back the car all the way out, which I did without getting hung up in the snowbank. Phew! He shoveled out where the car had been and told me to try it again. I felt really bad about this, because dammit, I am supposed to shovel my own driveway. Before I pulled the car back in I brushed off the windows again. I perhaps should have done that before I pulled back out of the driveway, but one does not always behave in the ideal fashion.

After my neighbor’s efforts with the shovel, I got the car in the driveway. I thanked him profusely. What a great neighbor! He asked me was I all set. I assured him that I was. I shoveled a bit more, including a short area in the back for Tabby’s business meetings.

Other areas have gotten more snow than I did. Other people have bigger driveways to shovel. Other bad weather travails outweigh mine. Other people do not have nice neighbors to help them. Well, I never said I was Job. I’m just telling you a little story about my day. I hope you’ll tune in tomorrow, which will be Tuesday but I hope not Tired Tuesday.

The Post I Should Have Made Friday

I am in full wrist-to-forehead mode. I have a headache, I keep forgetting what time I have to be at the theatre, I have to clean my upstairs and organize laundry, and I can’t think of what to write for a blog post.

I do have one shout-out to a local business. Friday, regular readers will recall, was opening night of Busybody, the play I am in with Ilion Little Theatre. I had rehearsal the night before but had gotten up at 3:30 that morning to work overtime. I got home from work before four, planning to nap till 5:30 or so. I found a note from my husband: “Honey- If at all possible, please don’t take a nap or your shower before 4:30. You will find out why. Love, Steve”

At first I was not best pleased. I had my schedule planned! Why was he messing with a nervous leading lady on opening night? Then I realized: it’s got to be something good. What sweet thing had my husband planned? And how could I modify my schedule to accommodate?

I ate some food. This was actually better. Obviously I had to have fuel in my body for the show, but it is a mistake to eat too much too close to curtain. This would work. And it didn’t take long. What else could I do? I turned on the computer, checked my Facebook notifications and email, then logged onto WordPress. And realized I was much too flustered to come up with a post.

Around twenty after four the phone rang. The caller ID said “Flowers by Suzanne.” So that was it! The nice lady on the phone asked said she had some flowers to deliver but wanted to make sure I was there, because it was much too cold to leave flowers outside.

Soon I was opening the door to the nice lady and a lovely basket of flowers. My schnoodle Tabby ran out to greet her, too. She may have gotten a little too friendly while I was admiring the flowers, but I got her back into the house eventually. The flowers smelled wonderful. I was delighted.

I still had time for nap, shower, and more butterflies before opening night, which I have already told you went well. And making this blog post has alleviated just a few of my butterflies for today. Once again, Busybody is at Ilion Little Theatre, 13 Remington Ave., Ilion, NY, today and Feb. 8 at 2 p.m., Feb. 6 and 7 at 8 p.m.

Flowers by Suzanne is located at 433 Mohawk St., Herkimer, NY, phone number 315-866-0206. Their website is www.flowersbysuzanne.net.

In My Defense, It’s Cold!

Here’s a new feature: Saturday Misadventures. It is for those numerous Saturdays when I do not have Saturday Running Commentary but instead type down a few paragraphs of what I did instead of write a good blog post.

When we got up this morning it was one degree out according to our thermostat. I don’t know where it gets this information; the thermostat came with the new furnace. I would get one of those jobs with the big numbers to hang on the garage like my parents have, but I don’t have a window handy for looking out at the garage. If I’m going to open the door anyways, what do I need a thermometer for?

Come to think of it, I did open the door, to get the newspaper (LOVE my newspaper deliverers!). Yikes! I made sure to replace the doodads under our door meant to keep the draft out (with indifferent success). Still, it was above zero. What could I possibly complain about? Got you there: I am not complaining, I am OBSERVING!

I wrote some postcards, but a walk to the post office was clearly ineligible. I know my dog would eagerly jump and bark if I picked up the leash, but I do not want a frostbitten little pooch. I’ve been limiting her outdoor activity to short business meetings in the back yard.

Still, I could not stay home under the blankets as was my inclination. I had to put air in one tire and I had to gas up. And I had to leave my vehicle in the street, because I leave for the theatre after Steven gets home tonight. I’m in a play, remember (see yesterday’s post, among others). As the temperature rose to 2 degrees, my hopes rose proportionately.

As it turns out, for no good reason. I did not do anything blogworthy. And my brain is too frozen to remember any of the blogworthy things I did previously but have not written about yet. I feel properly ashamed of myself, but I must not repine. I have a show to put on later.

Hope to see you on Wrist to Forehead Sunday.

Break a Lame

I did say I might post late (and lame) so I could write about how the play went. Full disclosure: that isn’t the only reason. I was just too flustered earlier to write. I was pretty sure the play would go well. After all, the script is strong, the cast is talented, and everybody has been working hard. Still, one can’t help but be nervous.

At work today a friend was keeping a count for me. He started about twenty minutes to eleven.

“Nine hours and 18 minutes till curtain,” he said.

Luckily our work spaces are not all that close, so I didn’t get the update every few minutes. I did not need any help getting butterflies in my stomach. All I could do to counter it was continue to look over my lines (while on break) and think about my character (which I am capable of doing while I accomplish my job).

Briefly, then, the play went great. The audience laughed a lot. I confess, there were some mistakes and dropped lines. However, everybody helped everybody else and the performance ran smoothly. I don’t know why I still feel flustered. Perhaps because I have five more performances to get through.

Still, the first performance is out of the way and went well. I am looking forward to doing it again. And eventually to finding something other than the play to write about.

Just to reiterate, the play is Busybody at Ilion Little Theatre, 13 Remington Ave, Ilion, NY, Jan. 31, Feb. 1, 6, 7 and 8, 8 p.m. Friday and Saturdays, 2 p.m. Sundays. For more information visit www.ilionlittletheatre.org, or Like Ilion Little Theatre Club on Facebook.

May I Remind You: It Is Non-Sequitur Thursday

So I am staring at the clock deciding what time I must leave to go to final dress rehearsal for the play I am in at Ilion Little Theatre.

And I have the dreaded Type A Sentence Then Backspace Over It disease. What’s a blogger to do? What I usually do, I suppose. Grit my teeth, type and leave it there! When one is determined to post every day, any words are better than no words at all.

The critics in my head are poised to argue this, of course, but they do not have a leg to stand on, metaphorical or otherwise. Critics, please note the subordinate clause that precedes the contention praising “any words.” Now they will go on to suggest that I become determined to post something good every day, but I shall not listen. I must hit publish and run.

I have been having a devilish time of it for the past day or so. When I went to put in my contact lenses last night, one ripped. This has never happened to me before. I was not aware until this morning that half of that contact remained in my eye. As an explanation, I can only offer that bit of philosophy that has helped me through many a tribulation: shit happens.

Do you know how hard it is to get a partial contact lens out of an eye? Well, I finally managed it. I will just add: I do not usually wear contact lenses. For my purposes, glasses suit me better. But I keep some one-day disposables around for specific purposes, such as being in a play.

What a dull post. I should have gone into details of my horrific eye-poking experience. Too late. I have some tea to make (for a prop) and other dramatic concerns to deal with. Tomorrow is opening night. Perhaps I will write my post late and tell you how it goes.

Maybe I Shoulda Wussed

I know “shoulda” is not a word. For that matter, neither is “wussed.” What do you people want from me? I’m just a silly blogger who is also in a play. I thought to myself after work, “Don’t have a Wuss-out Wednesday. Take your dog for a walk and write about that.” Yes, sometimes I talk to myself as if I was a separate person. It works for me.

Tabby was beyond excited when I picked up her harness and she realized we were going for a walk. We have not been out in days, because it has been too cold. Yesterday it was snowing as well. It didn’t snow much, so you local readers who are currently saying, “Waaaait a minute!” perhaps missed it. It happened to snow in the brief window of opportunity I had to decide to walk. Also, I’ve been fighting some bugaboo. Why walk in the cold and aggravate a sinus headache?

Today was supposed to be marginally warmer than previous days. High of 21, I think. Well, 21 is in the 20s. I can walk my dog in the 20s. I can even go running in the 20s, but I’ll save that for a day I don’t have rehearsal. I forgot my scarf but had coat, hat, mittens. I still haven’t located Tabby’s coat, but she has her natural fur coat. We wouldn’t take a long walk.

I hadn’t gotten to the end of the driveway when I was questioning the wisdom of walking at all. Ice, ice, ice. Well, perhaps it was just the driveway. After all, we have dripping eaves over the driveway. The sidewalks would be better. Tabby pulled me across the street. Either side was fine with me. The sidewalk plow had done its work.

So intent was I on my walking plan that I had not bothered to change out of my steel-toed work shoes. I soon made the observation that “non-slip soles” must refer to factory floors not icy sidewalks. Yikes! I walked slowly. Tabby was eagerly trotting but nicely moderated her pace to accommodate me. When she stopped to sniff we were both happy.

I have to confess the walk was not the most pleasant I have taken. I did observe the beautifully clear blue sky when Tabby was sniffing once but other than that I mostly kept my eyes on the sidewalk watching for glare ice and poop left behind by inconsiderate dog owners (at least I think it was dog poop; I shall not indulge in further speculation). Soon I realized my face was quite cold. Well, a scarf does not always fix that, I comforted myself. Then again, the scarf would have kept the wind off the back of my neck. However I refused to repine but concentrated on remaining upright.

It was a struggle. When we went through Meyers Park I gave up on the path and plowed through the snow alongside. Many footprints showed I was not the first to do so. It was a great deal more effort, but I felt safer. Tabby stayed on the path, where she found herself once modifying her pace to accommodate me. After the park I saw a lovely stretch of bare sidewalk and almost wiped out getting to it.

After several other scares we made it home. I confess, there were times when only Tabby’s pulling on the leash kept me upright. Thank goodness I don’t have a smaller dog; we may have both gone flying. So now I am left with the question: was this any better than a post of me dithering about how I can’t write a post when I’m in a play? It doesn’t matter. This is today’s post. Now I must get ready for rehearsal.