Tag Archives: writing

Lame Words, Different Friday

Posted on December 19, 2015 by mohawkvalleygirl

I can’t do everything right.  I’m just not built that way.  And really, would I be as charming and lovable if I always took the sensible choice?  This is where the inner critic chimes in with remarks about who ever said I was charming and lovable, and never mind EVERYTHING but could I possibly do ONE thing right ONCE in a while?

You see why I do not like to listen to my inner critic. She is not very nice in addition to being quite sarcastic and not in a good way.

That is what I wrote earlier today, and I was feeling pretty damn happy about it. It was fun to write, and it was easy.  The words were flowing. It was great.  Now, I confess, I look at it an realize it is the same schtick I have written before and it is not that many words anyways.  Then again, what do I expect on Lame Post Friday?

What I did wrong this time, in case anybody was wondering, was to stay up too late drinking white wine at Ilion Little Theatre’s monthly dinner meeting.  The December meeting is always more of a party than a meeting, which is one reason I try not to miss it.  I had a marvelous time and am full of theatre plans for the coming year.

However, before the New Year, I must get through Christmas.  That is what this weekend is all about.  I am a little later than I prefer in making this post, because I was out Christmas shopping earlier.  And I spent a little time on the phone with my sister, making Christmas plans (and by “making Christmas plans” I mean asking her what she’s going to fix for Christmas dinner) (No, I’m not cooking for Christmas — hey, she volunteered!).

So another thing I do wrong is to make yet another foolish post where I just don’t say a hell of a lot.  But I hope you’re all having a marvelous Friday.

 

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Are Cuff Links the Same Thing as Cuff Buttons?

Posted on December 15, 2015 by mohawkvalleygirl

Well, this is what happened to me today.  I opened my notebook (my paper, spiral-bound notebook; I was on a break at work) and found a blog post I wrote last month about a cheesy horror movie I had seen.  Of course I read it (I like to read my own writing, although I feel rather conceited that I do).  It was OK. I could use this.

Today’s blog post taken care of (so I thought), I turned a few pages (I had written other things in that notebook besides the movie write-up) and began a post about some fun in Little Falls Steven and I had on Saturday.  That was going pretty good, too, till I got a little bogged down.  No matter,  I told myself, this is Tuesday’s post well started and I can just use the movie post for today.

When I got home I briefly considered typing an off-the-cuff Monday Mental Meanderings just because I was so tired (it is Monday, after all).  Then I told myself to not be such a bum and start typing.  I got my notebook, found the movie post, and started typing.

Boy, do I write a lot about those cheesy horror movies!  I got tired of typing real quick but kept going.  Till I got even more tired.  Then I looked at how much more I had to type.  No way!  Why knew I was that prolific?

What now?  Type in what I have on the Little Falls post and finish that?   I’m not up for it.  I should have gone with the off the cuff post to begin with, because, to be honest, by this time I have nothing on my cuffs.  I probably never did.  Where did that expression come from, anyways, “off the cuff”?  Is that from when cuffs were separate pieces that got attached to shirts with cuff-links or cuff-buttons and people wrote notes to themselves on them?  Did people write notes to themselves on their cuffs?  It sounds like a handy spot.

Oh, will you look at that?  I just had an authentic Mental Meandering and it’s still Monday.  I declare this post done.

 

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In Fact, Almost 300 Words

Posted on December 11, 2015 by mohawkvalleygirl

Well, this isn’t too bad after all.  I had a silly post on Monday, a Running Commentary on Tuesday, and a shout-out to a local business on Wednesday.  I can get away with a Non-Sequitur Thursday post today.  Oh who am I kidding?  I post as much foolishness as I write and rarely worry about getting away with anything.  I type, people read.  It is most convenient.  At least, I hope people read.

I went running again today but for once did not narrate in my head as I ran.  I had a headache all day with nausea in the afternoon and almost talked myself out of running.  The nausea had passed by the end of the day, and I can usually run with a headache.  I whined to a couple of co-workers that I didn’t want to go running.  Then one fellow expressed great admiration for my running.

“I don’t know how you run,” he said.

“Slowly and not very often,” I confessed.

“I wish I could run.”  Asthma prevents him.  After that it felt churlish not to run.  Additionally, the weather was unseasonably warm.  I could wear shorts and short sleeves.  Score!

But I didn’t mean to write a running commentary.  I see that in a previous paragraph I also complained about my aches and pains.  I did not mean to do that either.  Oh, I know, that is why they make the backspace and delete buttons.   But then  it would be a much shorter blog post.

Would that be such a bad thing, you may ask.  Possibly not.  My inner critic would agree, but I try not to listen to that bitch.  No matter.  I am well over 200 words, so I’m going to slap on a snappy title and call it a day.  Happy Thursday, everyone.

 

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Ah Yes, the Blog Post

Posted on December 6, 2015 by mohawkvalleygirl

I spent the day knowing that sooner or later I would have to come up with a blog post.  Of course my Writer’s Blank continues.  Did I mention I was suffering from Writer’s Blank?  I guess it’s not exactly blank, since I am, in fact, able to put words on paper (or on screen, as the case may be).   But they aren’t good words (not that I’m the best judge of that) and I don’t like them (of course I am the only judge of that).

Where was I?  Ah yes, trying for a Scattered Saturday post.

I got up early and left my house bound for Marcy then Liverpool.  I picked up my sister Cheryl and we headed to Breakfast with Santa, which was organized by my sister Diane, at Christ the King Church.  She has been in charge of the event for some years now, but this is the first time I have ever been able to attend.

That would make a good blog post, wouldn’t it?  Not exactly in the Mohawk Valley, but a nice community event.  Or the adventure of me driving my sister into Syracuse.  That was pretty brave of her, wasn’t it?  We had an even more adventurous ride home, with part of a couch sticking out of the back of my SUV.

And, yes, the couch is its own adventure, nicely given to me and Steven by my cousin Mary Beth.  Mary Beth, Cheryl and I got it out of Mary’s house and into my vehicle.  Steve and my nephew Dan helped us get it into my house.  Fun times!

Now I am cooking one of what Steven calls my conglomerations (how DO you spell that word?) (got it).  I don’t know how it will turn out as I am not sure what all I will put in it.

You see where I’m going with this, right?

That’s right! Scattered Saturday!  A brief overview of my activities, any one of which I may write about at greater length at some future date and time.  As always, I hope you’ll stay tuned.

 

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Lame Laugh on December 4

Posted on December 5, 2015 by mohawkvalleygirl

It is the bra off, sweats on, wine drinking,  blog post writing portion of the evening.

And it is Lame Post Friday.

As regular readers may have noticed, I do not always write my blog posts in sweats and no bra (ooh, I just flashed on that Most Interesting Man in the World,  “I don’t always drink beer…”).  Many times I write my posts while on a break at work.  Many times I do not specify how I am dressed when I post.  However, today I do not have a whole lot to post about, so I led with the setting.

Earlier tonight, Steven and I were at a notorious big box store which needs no plug from Mohawk Valley Girl.  I only mention it because it took MUCH longer than reasonably expected.  And I did not expect it to be short and sweet.  However, it was not too heinous, for which I have my Christmas Spirit and sense of humor to thank.  Or perhaps it was the tiny glass of wine I had before shopping (say it ain’t so!).

I am getting a little bit of Christmas Spirit. I have been listening to Christmas music on CD as I drive to and from work (I know, how 20th century of me).  I have been noticing and appreciating Christmas lights on people’s houses.  I have been planning Christmas presents (Naughty status of friends and family notwithstanding).

My sense of humor really kicked in, however, as the check-out line took longer than walking over the whole store for the stuff on our list.  Every cash register was frozen and the lines stretched further than the eye could see.  At long last we were leaving.

“And it’s only December 4th!”  I said.  I laughed all the way to the car.

 

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Time Warp Tuesday

Posted on November 25, 2015 by mohawkvalleygirl

Thanksgiving week has been weird since I’ve been working at the factory.  We have the long weekend that many Monday through Friday workers enjoy, a luxury I have not had in years.  Well, I’ve had it for over four years now and I’m still not used to it.

Monday was definitely Monday, but it was also like Wednesday, because there were only two more days of work.  Today was in fact Tuesday, and it felt like that since it was the day after Monday, BUT it was also Wednesday, because it was the middle of the week, and it was also Thursday, because tomorrow is the last work day. Tomorrow, in addition to being Wednesday, for obvious reasons, is also Friday AND it is also Thursday, because we get paid, and Thursday is payday.  I’m sure you can understand my confusion.

I have no doubt gone over all this in previous years.  I’m hoping anybody who remembers does not mind reading it again.  You see, I must come back to the fact that it is Tuesday, because it is TIRED TUESDAY!

I actually did write something today. I began what I hoped was a rather amusing account of a Hammer Studios movie we watched on Sunday.  It’s running a little long, though, and I’d like to work on it some more.  I thought, “No problem.  I’m going running after work. I’ll write about that.”  Guess what I didn’t do after work today.

And I just remembered, I put in laundry!  I’ve got to get it in the drier!  Be right back!

. . .

That was fun.  Now I come back to the computer to realize I was done after all.  To go back and edit or leave as is?  I pick as is.  Is that the right decision?  You be the judge.  I’ll try for a better blog post tomorrow, but it will be Wuss-out Wednesday. Or will it be Lame Post Friday?  The suspense!

 

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Is Jerry Lewis Still Alive?

Posted on November 23, 2015 by mohawkvalleygirl

I went running twice this weekend.  I could write a heck of a Running Commentary today instead of Wrist to Forehead Sunday, couldn’t I?  Well, maybe I could and maybe I couldn’t.  As Fats Waller famously queried, One never knows, do one?

Regular readers know I have been struggling to begin running yet again.  Yes, I have started and stopped running many times.  As long as I keep beginning again, I am reasonably content with myself.  After all, as I have often observed, beating oneself up doesn’t burns calories, build muscles, increase aerobic health or even keep one reasonably entertained for any length of time.  Running can potentially accomplish all of the above.

So I ran on Saturday and again on Sunday.  They were not great runs, more like plods, especially Saturday’s.  No matter.  I got out and did it.

And I really don’t feel like writing about it.

No matter, it is Wrist to Forehead Sunday as well as my birthday.  I am now playing with a full deck, 52 years old.  I stole that joke from Jerry Lewis.  He used it at the beginning of one of his Labor Day Telethons, back in the day when it was quite the thing to watch the telethon.  Well, they say plagiarism is the sincerely form of flattery.  At least, I say it.

So that is my post today.  I told you I ran but didn’t tell you about my run, then I shared a lame, stolen joke.  And it took me over 250 words.  I’ll call that OK.  Gee, I hope I still have readers by tomorrow.  Happy Sunday, everybody.

 

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Is That an Excuse, or Are You Just Happy to See Me?

Posted on November 20, 2015 by mohawkvalleygirl

I wrote one paragraph of a blog post while at work today, and it wasn’t very good.  I had a title I thought was pretty good, but I don’t want to use it till I have a half-way decent blog post to go with it.  What I’m saying is, welcome to Non-Sequitur Thursday.

One can’t really take a nap at 5:55 p.m., unless one is planning on staying up quite late, which I am not.  I personally don’t care to take naps after 3 p.m., although I love them at almost any time prior to that.  Sleep, ah, wonderful sleep.  According to Shakespeare it knits something or other (I probably could think of the actual expression if I tried, but I thought it would be funnier if I did not).

Am I babbling?  Ooh, that might make a good headline. Or not.

I am waiting for Steven to come home and we are supposed to head to the monthly dinner meeting of Ilion Little Theatre.  I made guacamole and hummus to bring.  I had planned to make the guacamole, without benefit of recipe.  I told a work friend about it as we were walking out.

“I’ll put some stuff in, then mush it, taste it, mush it, taste it,” I said.  “Then I’ll write a blog post about it.”

Of course it did not go as planned, although the adventure did include mushing and tasting.  I thought it would, in fact, make a pretty good blog post.  Only I am too tired to write it.  How embarrassing.

On the other hand, I am now over 250 words, and I call that respectable.  Now I just need a good, non-sequitury title, and I’m in business.   Tune in tomorrow for Lame Post Friday, when Mohawk Valley Girl says, “And the reason I did not write a blog post today is that…”

 

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Who, Me? Have a Life?

Posted on November 19, 2015 by mohawkvalleygirl

That’s it.  Wuss-out Wednesday it is.  I just typed in two sentences and backspaced them out.  I will not do it again.  It is getting late (for me) and I am tired (as usual).  I want to make my post and go to bed.  Maybe after looking at Facebook, which I haven’t really had time to do today (I’m a little bit addicted).

Why, you may be asking, did I not write a post earlier, perhaps while on break at work or while waiting for a doctor appointment?  I will answer, with a trace of defensive smugness (if you can be defensive and smug at the same time), I was writing something else.  I worked all day on an article for Mohawk Valley Living.  I hope it was good.

I often say that writing begets more writing, and I think in general it is true.  But sometimes I get tired.

One problem is that I have been straight out between stage managing the play at Ilion Little Theatre, working overtime, dealing with homeowner-type chores, and in general trying to have a life.  I guess that’s my whole problem.  Who ever said I could have a life?  I guess nobody, I just thought I could have one.  Wrong again!

One encouraging thought (for me anyways), is that it looks as if writing really does encourage writing, because tired as I am, it is kind of fun to type this in now, and I am thinking how I would REALLY like to have an hour or two to sit and work at the novel I haven’t done a thing with in months.  I positively must carve out time in my silly life to do so.

And perhaps tomorrow I can carve out time to write a better blog post.  Happy Wednesday, everyone.

 

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Lame to You and More of It!

Posted on November 14, 2015 by mohawkvalleygirl

For today’s Lame Friday Post, I bring you another edition of Common Expressions Revisited.  Warning!  This post may become somewhat vulgar.  If you don’t think you’ll like that, don’t read. And regular readers KNOW how I feel about the expression TMI (hate it, Hate it, HATE IT!!!).

Kiss my ass.  No, no, I’m not telling you to do that.  That’s the first expression I want to talk about it.  Think about all the people you have told, directly or remotely to kiss your ass (by remotely, I mean, “He/she/they can kiss my ass!)”   Now consider the wear and tear on your buns if everyone, or even a portion of that number availed themselves of that generous invitation.  Yikes!

Bite me.  This is sometimes said as “Bite my butt,” which I kind of prefer, as it has the charm of alliteration.  Obviously, this could be even more painful than kissing.   In the “Bite me” version, I worry that one does not specify the body part.  I feel it leaves one vulnerable.

To my last statement, some of you are no doubt saying, “Well, it goes without saying,”  and that is another common expression I take exception to.  Very few things actually go without saying.  Oh yes, there are a few things we can and do take for granted, like, for example, gravity.  But my observation is that people still say them.  In other words, “It goes without saying” is usually not the end of the sentence.  Usually it’s, “It goes without saying THAT…”  Ah yes, there is the variation that it is said in answer,  “That goes without saying.”  Well, it didn’t go without saying if I just said it, now, did it?  I’m just saying.

OK, I guess the first two examples could be considered vulgar, but I feel there an be no possible exception to the third.  On my next grammatical excursion, I may discuss the expressions “I think,” “I believe,” and “I feel.”  I hope you are all having a delightful Friday.

 

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