Category Archives: humor

Pop Goes the Lame Post

Posted on November 5, 2016 by mohawkvalleygirl

I seem to remember doing a not too contemptible post while waiting for my husband to get me ice cream.  Today he is bringing me popsicles, which apparently I do not know how to spell.

Popsickles.  popsikles. pop sic cles.  Oh dear. popcicyles?  The box just says “Assorted Pops.”  What a way to weasel out of that one!

It is Lame Post Friday, and I am not going to take any more of that pain medication!

Now is when I greatly regret every Blogger’s Sick Day I’ve ever taken.  Who knew I would one day feel worse?  Oh, I know, YOU probably did, you just know everything, don’t you?  Incidentally, that popsycle was not the miracle cure I was hoping for.   Still, it didn’t taste too bad.

I don’t mean to be so tiresome, going on about my woes.  In fact, I begin to glimpse the light at the end of the tunnel.  Few bad things last forever.  I would say nothing bad lasts forever, but it is a well-observed phenomenon that bad things have greater staying power than good things.  Heeeeyyyy!  I think that counts as a random observation AND half-baked philosophy, which, regular readers may recall, are my favorite components of Lame Post Friday.

And it got me just over 200 words. Score!  I call that good.  If only I knew how to spell popcicle, my life would be perfect.

 

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In My Defense, I’m Still on Pain Meds

Posted on November 4, 2016 by mohawkvalleygirl

While scrolling around Facebook earlier and wondering in a vague sort of way what I could come up with for a blog post (it is too tiresome to explain why I cannot be out having Mohawk Valley adventures), I happened to mention in a comment that I wrote poetry about my co-workers in a past work situation.  Someone asked if they were available online.  I said no, but perhaps they would make a good blog post for a Non-Sequitur Thursday.  My readers will be the judge of that.

I began with an attempt at a Haiku.  Now, I have read that one does not have to be married to the five syllables, seven syllables, five syllables rule, on account of English being quite a different language from Japanese.  Still, I got dinged on it by other co-workers.  Everybody’s a critic!  And now I realize I cannot remember that poem in its entirety.   Come on, Cindy, it’s three lousy lines!  I think I will have better luck with the rhyming ones.

 

There was a frame stylist named Ro

Who didn’t have very much dough.

She went back to college

to get some more knowledge.

And then she would not be so po.

 

My husband helped me on that one.  The next one, which I like a little better, I came up with on my own, based on actual events.

 

There once was a lab tech named Wayne

Who liked to drink too much champagne.

He said, “I feel fine!

I would like some more wine!”

But it drove his fiance insane.

 

I was going to change the names, and put them in quotes, like the writers-in to Dear Abby do, but I needed to rhyme.  I hope I am not putting myself at risk for a libel suit.  Then again, what’s wrong with being broke and occasionally drinking too much wine?  And I only used first names.  Every Wayne and Ro on the internet could sue!  Ah, they wouldn’t get much anyways.  I’m so po, I buy cheap champagne!

 

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Wussy Post about Cheesy Coming Attractions

Posted on November 3, 2016 by mohawkvalleygirl

I’m afraid it’s Wuss-out Wednesday.  Never mind why.  It just is.  However, due to  my perhaps unhealthy obsession with publishing a post every day, I will attempt to think of something that will entertain.

Halloween continues at Mohawk Valley Girl’s house. For one reason,  Steven has had no chance as yet to take down our decorations.  What, me take down the decorations?  I don’t want to take down the decorations!  I want to make Santa hats for the ghosts and witches.

More to the point, I have many Halloween movies I have not yet watched, or at least not watched this season.  I bet there are even some I have not written blog posts about.  You know how  I love to write blog posts about cheesy horror movies (and if you did not know I’m telling you now:  I love to write blog posts about cheesy movies) .  I have several movies awaiting me on my DVR, some previously viewed and/or written about, some not. Additionally, I purchased a new DVD last night while on our bat and skull mission.

We found Attack of the Killer B’s in the $5 bin at K-mart.  It is a 10 movie collection.  Some of the movies I have on other collections:  The Brain that Wouldn’t Die, The Killer Shrews, Eegah!  Some look vaguely familiar.  I may have DVRd them from TCM or something.  But a few are definitely new to me.  I coyly suggested Steven buy me the movie for my birthday.  He said, “If you want that DVD, we can buy it.”

So we did.  And this is my blog post about it.  I guess it’s kind of a  lame post for a Wednesday night, even one of the Wuss-out variety.  No matter.  It’s over 200 words and I’m hitting publish.  I hope to see you all on Non-Sequitur Thursday as well as for future posts when I write about  such movies as Teenagers from Outer Space or Invasion of the Bee Girls.

 

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Dinner before Skulls and Bats

Posted on November 2, 2016 by mohawkvalleygirl

I wanted to go to a couple of stores and look at the post-Halloween sales, because I need some skulls and bats.  To encourage Steven to go with me, I suggested we get dinner out.  As an added bonus for me, I asked could we go somewhere that would make a good blog post.  We decided to try a place we hadn’t been to yet: Roma’s Pizza and Pasta in Herkimer, NY.

Roma’s is a fairly recent addition to our choices of places to eat in Herkimer.  It is located in the site previously occupied by Brian’s Roast Beef Deli.  We miss Brian’s!  But we hoped we would like Roma’s as well.

I noticed the daily specials on the wall outside the store: today’s was large cheese pizza, 20 wings, small antipasto, 2 liter, $34.   We weren’t that hungry.  As we walked in we encountered a delicious aroma.  Maybe we were that hungry.   A couple of people were standing near the counter in front, waiting for take-out orders.  We walked to the tables in the back, sat down, and looked at menus.

After great indecision I ordered a cheeseburger with fries while Steven got chicken tenders and fries.  He got coffee and I had water.  I confess to being intrigued by the Phat Sandwiches, which sounded huge, messy and wonderful.  However, I concluded that my first assessment of not being that hungry was probably right.  Actually, the cheeseburger was quite large and came with a generous helping of fries.  Oh, was it tasty!

I picked up a copies of the menu and the daily specials as we left.  We will definitely go to Roma’s again!  Roma’s Pizza and Pasta is located at 122 N. Main St, Herkimer, phone number 315-866-7888.

 

 

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Wrist to Seeds to Shout-outs

Posted on October 31, 2016 by mohawkvalleygirl

Well, it is Wrist to Forehead Sunday, we all knew it would be.  I’m still trying to get over my cold.  Yesterday’s chicken soup helped, especially when I heated up two more bowls of it this afternoon.  Extra sleep has helped too.  I may stop complaining about my ills any day now, but let’s not expect miracles, shall we?  At least I can stop whining long enough to give a shout-out to a local business that helped us out today.

In the best of circumstances I don’t often cook something good two days in a row.  Additionally, the oven was already occupied by roasting pumpkin seeds. Yes, we waited till the day before Halloween to carve our pumpkin.  What can I say, it’s been a rough month.  But today Steven carved a delightful face in the pumpkin we got from Pumpkin Junction in Sauquoit (ooh, that will make two shout-outs today).  I gathered the seeds and put them in the oven to roast, after tossing them in olive oil with salt and spices.  Just to give another shout-out, I used the Salt Free Essential Spice Blend I got from So Sweet Candy Cafe  (it was at their booth at the Mohawk Valley Garlic and Herb Festival in Little Falls, so it actually may have been So Sweet Candy Confections, but what’s in a name) (and I just gave a shout-out to the Garlic Festival, didn’t I?).

That was kind of a convoluted paragraph, wasn’t it?  You’ll have that when a blogger is not feeling 100% for some days in a row.  No matter, my original purpose here was to give a shout-out to Carney’s Corners.  Steven called in an order for pick-up, an Italian sub and pasta salad.  I had not had an Italian sub in a while.  I’ve been trying to get away from processed, aged meats, since I heard they may be migraine triggers.  Never mind that they are some of my favorite things.  Salami and pepperoni, YUM!  I thoroughly enjoyed my half of that sub.

OK, I’ve carefully put in links to Pumpkin Junction, So Sweet Candy Cafe and Mohawk valley Garlic and Herb Festival.  I couldn’t find a site for Carney’s Corners, but they are located at 232 N. Washington St., Herkimer, phone number 315-866-7191.  And if you don’t feel like clicking, Pumpkin Junction is at 2188 Graffenburg Rd., Sauquoit, 315-794-4604 (although their last day of business for the year may be Oct. 31, so hurry); So Sweet Candy Cafe is 531 Varick St., Utica, 315-765-6463.

 

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Slacker Sick Day

Posted on October 30, 2016 by mohawkvalleygirl

I did not have Lame Post Friday this week, because I wanted to use my Hollywood photographs (are they still called photographs when you do it with a Tablet?) while the display was still, you know, on display, even if just for one more day.  Therefore, I will feel free to have a Slacker Saturday, because slacker is actually a kind term for how I’ve been today.  Don’t judge.

Oh, all right, judge if you want to.  I don’t care.

It’s a cold this time.  I thought I was getting it last weekend and thought it would be gone by now.  I hold onto the hope that it will be gone by Monday.  I suppose it is no great matter.  I’ll still go to work on overtime.  I realized something about myself a long time ago:  I can put up with almost any amount of suck for just about as long as I make up my mind to.  I guess that is not strictly true, since sometimes I find myself quite unable to make up my mind to, but the thought has gotten me through a lot of bad runs and tough times.  You know how I like to pretend I’m bad-ass.

Where was I?  Ah yes, trying to write some semblance of a blog post.  I certainly did not go running this morning.  In fact, after Steven went to work I took a nice nap.  I spent part of the afternoon watching an old horror movie in hopes I could get a blog post out of it (possible preview of coming attractions).  While I watched and crocheted, I had chicken boiling on the stove.  I feel sure chicken soup will help relieve my current discomfort.

And just so you know I am not completely useless, after I put the chicken on and before I started the movie, I washed the dishes.  After the movie and before chopping onions and crushing garlic for the soup, I put the dishes away.  Steven will be so pleased when he gets home.  I feel a little pleased myself.

Now I see I am over 300 words.  I call that respectable. I am going to hit Publish then go make myself a nice cup of tea with lemon and honey.  Oh the joy of sipping hot liquid when suffering from a cold.  I hope you are all having a lovely weekend, and I hope to see you tomorrow on Wrist to Forehead Sunday.

 

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MVG Goes Hollywood

Posted on October 29, 2016 by mohawkvalleygirl

Well,  let’s see if I can do this.  I’m on my tablet, trying to make my post about the costumes at the mall.  This first photo is front the Grace Kelly section.  The dress in the foreground is from Rear Window,  the background is from To Catch a Thief.

We love Rear Window.

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As I have mentioned  before, it is awkward to post on the tablet. Still, one must persevere.

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I was a little disappointed that the Better Davis dress was just one from an awards show.  When I had heard there would be one of her dresses there, I confess I got my hopes up for the iconic party dress from All About Eve.  Still, Bette Davis.  There could be no possible objection.

In many people’s minds Bette Davis and Joan  Crawford go together.  Both are represented here.  I liked Joan’s dress even better.

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I had to take the plaque separately.

Likewise,  I needed two shots for Drums Along the Mohawk , which of course has a delightful local connection.

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Many will recognize Audrey Hepburn’s dress from My Fair Lady.

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We didn’t recognize the movie these costumes were from,  but we liked them.

The display continues at Sangertown Mall through tomorrow,  Oct. 29.  Sorry for giving local readers such short notice in case you want to check it out, but these things happen.  I hope at least you enjoyed my photos.  Happy Friday, everyone.

 

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I’ll Miss that Dead Day

Posted on October 28, 2016 by mohawkvalleygirl

I mentioned yesterday that I had started writing a shout-out to Overlook Mansion’s Day of the Dead, which is tomorrow at 6 p.m.  My plan was to try to finish it for today’s post, and as I begin to implement that plan I see that I did not have such a lot written to begin with.  I think I did mention I had a headache yesterday.  Never mind, let’s get on with the post.

The event is also being called a Dia de los Muertos themed fall celebration.  It is a family-friendly event with a whole lot of stuff going on. Costumes are encouraged but not required.  Face painting will be available, so if you show up looking normal, you don’t have to stay that way.  Members of LiFT will be on hand in costume and in character.  You know, theatre people.

Activities for kids will include Sugar Skull decorating and a scavenger hunt.  There will be a Salsa Dancing demonstration as well as story and fortune telling.  Light snacks and non-alcoholic punch will be available.   Personally, I was looking forward to just walking around the gorgeous Overlook Mansion.  I was there briefly when LiFT met to begin planning (perhaps you read my blog post about it) and fell in love with the place.

Advance sale tickets are available at brownpapertickets.com with prices as follows:  Individual tickets are $25 for adults, $12.50 for ages 12 and under.  Pairs of tickets are $40 for two adults, $30 for one adult and one child.  A family special is available for $50 for two adults and  two children.  Tickets will also be available at the door at $30 adults, $15 children 12 and under.

For more information, contact the Overlook Mansion, 55 Douglas St.,  Little Falls, NY, (315) 823-1907.

 

 

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In My Defense, I Have a Headache

Posted on October 27, 2016 by mohawkvalleygirl

OK, this is what happened to me today.  I was supposed to be helping decorate the Overlook Mansion in Little Falls, NY, for their Dia de los Muertos themed fall celebration.  Several members of LiFT, the Little Falls Theatre Company, are participating.  Well, I decided I could not do it.  I have too many issues (and not back issues of Playboy).  Or maybe I’m too big of a baby.  Reasons are so tiresome.

A work friend had told me about this wonderful display of vintage movie costumes at Sangertown Mall, outside of Boscov’s, the new department store there.  I guess it is part of Boscov’s Grand Opening.  Steven and I LOVE old movies.  We wanted to go see.  Steven would have preferred to go on Thursday, but there is snow in the forecast.  So we went today.  I took a few pictures with our Tablet, in hopes of writing a blog post about it.

Additionally, I began writing a blog post while at work today, about the Outlook’s Day of the Dead.  I thought it would be nice to give them a shout-out, even if I do not take part.  Regular readers may also remember that I had hoped to go running after work and write about that.  Well, I did not do that, because then we never would have made it to the mall.

I’m seeing all these possibilities for blog posts and here I sit typing off the top of my head and doing it  quickly, because I want to go lie down.  I did mention that I have issues and that I’m a big baby, didn’t I? So I’m calling this a Wuss-out Wednesday, and I hope, as usual, to come up with something better tomorrow.  In the meantime if anybody wants to find out more about the event at the Overlook, I refer you to their Facebook event.  For more information on the costume display, I refer you to the Boscov’s (New Hartford) Facebook page.  As always, thank you for playing.

 

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Waiting for What?

Posted on October 26, 2016 by mohawkvalleygirl

I was at the doctor’s office this afternoon.  I won’t get into why because, you know, HIPPA and all.  Nothing serious or even particularly interesting. But I need a blog post and it is Tired Tuesday, so here we go.

They decided to do an EKG (is that how you spell it?  I mean, are all three letters capitalized?  I don’t know from medical terms).  The machine decided to give the nurse a little trouble (yes, I think of machines as sentient beings who delight in tormenting hapless humans).  It would not give a good reading.  I just lay there on the table with all those little wires taped to my body, trying to catch a nap.

The nurse said the machine kept saying, “Waiting for good data.”  I flashed on Waiting for Godot but did not know if she would get the theatrical reference so did not say anything.  I repeated “Waiting for good data” in my head several times, so I could use it in a Facebook post.  I decided to use it here instead.  I hope somebody was amused.

The last thing I had to do was let them draw blood.  I remarked to the phlebotomist that the blood was very seasonal, but she was not amused.  Come to think of it, she was a little cadaverous-looking herself, very thin with large eyes and a dead serious expression.  I’m sure she was not a vampire, because sunlight was coming through the window.  It wouldn’t matter that it was a cloudy day, would it?  I’m not up on all the vampire rules.

Oh dear, do you suppose I could get in trouble for making vampire jokes about a local phlebotomist?  She was a very good phlebotomist; I barely felt the needle go in.   And she wasn’t really cadaverous-looking.  I just threw that in for effect.

This is what happens on Tired Tuesday.  I get a little punchy.  But I see I have managed over 300 words, so let’s call it a post and move on.  I hope to go running tomorrow, so maybe I can write a post about that.

 

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