Category Archives: humor

More Murder and Mayhem on Slacker Saturday

Posted on March 25, 2018 by mohawkvalleygirl

I’m afraid it is a Slacker Saturday, or maybe a Sick Day Saturday.  As it happens, I did not do much today except for take two naps.  Judge me if you’d like to, I just didn’t feel too good. I feel better now but not up to a real good blog post.  Again, judge me if you must.  The second nap I took made me feel a little better, at least better enough to go to a local watering hole with my lovely husband Steven (a place I hope to write about for Mohawk Valley Living magazine). I have imbibed a trifle, again judge if you must.  Now I am hoping to make a quick post and get back to enjoying the knitting and television watching portion of my Saturday.

It’s not Sunday yet, but any day is a good day for Snapped!

I am taking a look at a Snapped On Demand.  Yes, it is more murder and mayhem for me.  I may have a Dateline on DVR.  We’ll have to check.

On NBC, ID, OWN, it’s all good!

I have the last rehearsal for Secret’s at Suiter House tomorrow.   Come to think of it, I don’t have all the props together.  Luckily rehearsal is not till 4:30.  I also need to get the Clue Sheet together.  That will be helpful for the actors when it comes to talking to the audience before the scripted portion of the performance.  And I must progress more on Spring into Murder.  I have another cast member, although I am concerned about his availability for rehearsals.  Oh, the trials and tribulations!

I have to love every murder mystery cast!

I thought I would end with a cast photo of a previous murder mystery.  I do like to use three graphics, and this is one of the all time great casts.  Happy Saturday, everybody!

 

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I Get Theatrical on Lame Post Friday

Posted on March 24, 2018 by mohawkvalleygirl

I don’t know if I can accurately describe what is going on in this scene.

It is 7:40 p.m. on Lame Post Friday, and as usual, I got nuthin’.  At least, I have things I can write about but lack the oomph to actually do so.  You’ll have that, especially with me.  I thought I would resort to pictures.  My husband, Steven, recently shared the above on Facebook as a Throw Back Thursday, and I thought it was fun.  The scene is from a DVD the Herkimer County Historical Society made for a Celebrity Roast of Assemblyman Marc Butler back in 2015.  It was just after the triumphant run of Roxy by Jack Sherman, the play the society put on at Ilion Little Theatre. I played the title role (I say modestly).   The DVD was all about the the Right to Bare Arms, an issue near and dear to Assemblyman Butler’s heart.  I don’t properly understand politics, but I enjoyed participating in the DVD.

Having downloaded that picture to share, I searched the Historical Society’s Facebook page for further photos.  First I came across a cast shot from the most recent murder mystery we put on for them, A G.R.A.V.E. Murder (perhaps you read a few of my blog posts about it).

G.R.A.V.E. stood for Ghost Retrieval And Verification Enterprises, if I recall that correctly (how embarrassing that I am not sure).

As I continued, I discovered some pictures from Who Shot JS? the first murder mystery we did for the society.  We killed off Jack Sherman, who wrote the play Roxy that I mentioned earlier.

We didn’t take a posed cast shot, but I think this one shows everybody.

Well, now I am approaching 300 words, so I can hit Publish and go back to enjoying my Friday night with a clear conscience.  I hope to see you all on Scattered Saturday, or whatever kind of a Saturday it turns out to be.

 

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More Murder and Mayhem!

Posted on March 23, 2018 by mohawkvalleygirl

I believe I have mentioned that I have another murder mystery to write.  I may also have mentioned (once or twice) that I have been having trouble writing ANYTHING lately.  Well, just now I surprised myself.  I wrote a brief overview of said mystery, to send to the venue for publicity purposes.  The venue is Morning Star Methodist Church in Ilion, NY, and the performance date is Saturday, April 28, 2018.  They are serving a roast pork dinner, which was quite delicious when we performed there last year and the year before.

So I have been writing this mystery in bits and pieces, and second guessing myself about everything.  I tried writing the overview twice on breaks at work today, to no avail.  Finally I sat down at my laptop and said, “Well, I’ve got to do this now.”  And here is what I wrote:

Spring into Murder takes place at the kick-off dinner for the Tulip Festival sponsored by Two Lips Cosmetics. The founder and CEO of the company loves everything to do with The Netherlands, so much so that she changed her first name to Holland and hired a bodyguard named Dutch. On the agenda for tonight is the unveiling of the spring line of lipstick colors, to be modeled by Holland’s spokesmodel and partner, the beautiful Ariel Angelica. Holland is accompanied by her new husband, Rod. Also on hand are Holland’s nephew Benedict and recently adopted daughter Windy, as well as the designer of this year’s colors, the brilliant if eccentric Giselle Ellison.

Unfortunately, all is not beauty and harmony at Two Lips Cosmetics. Rumor has it that Holland did not want to take on Ariel as a partner, that Benedict wanted Windy to be the spokesmodel, that Giselle feels badly paid for her work, and nobody knows quite what to think of Dutch. Additionally, we don’t know who sent Ariel a bouquet of BLACK tulips!
There may be murder before the night is out! Who will solve the crime?

I was rather pleased with it myself.  The new husband got his name as I wrote it, and Giselle Ellison (my part) changed from a dedicated secretary to a lipstick designer.  I think diva is much more fun than downtrodden.

Having written that much, I feel fired up to get the whole thing done.  I’ll share more information about the performance — times and prices — when I know more.

 

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It’s My Secret

Posted on March 22, 2018 by mohawkvalleygirl

I thought I would give another plug to Secrets at Suiter House, the murder mystery dinner theatre to benefit the Herkimer County Historical Society.  The event will take place at Ilion Moose Lodge, 302 Barringer Rd., on March 31.  Doors open at 5 p.m.  $20 per person includes an all you can eat spaghetti dinner.  There will also be a Chinese Auction with some really good prizes.

It is one week from Saturday!  Yikes!  I still don’t know what I’m wearing!  And there are a few more props I need to gather!  And does everybody in the cast know about the next rehearsal?

Oh dear, that was not a plug.  That was me dithering and probably did not leave a good impression.  I must correct that.  This murder mystery will be a lot of fun.  There are some good laughs in the script, along with some intriguing clues and local references.  Actually, the whole script is local.  It concerns a wealthy philanthropist (played by me) who is sponsoring the next exhibit at the Herkimer County Historical Society (whose museum, of course, is located in the Suiter House).  The dinner is a contest to decide who will be the curator.   Naturally there are a few hard feelings amongst the would-be curators, and EVERYBODY has a secret or two.

I last heard some 20 tickets were still available.  Are they still?  I don’t know!  For more information you can contact the historical society at 315-866-6413.

 

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A Blog to No Where

Posted on March 21, 2018 by mohawkvalleygirl

Can my readers bear yet another post about How I Can’t Write a Post Today.  I can’t write ANYTHING today!  And it has been that way for a very long time.

OK, that is an exaggeration.  I can write something.  Here I am, typing in nonsense I intend to pass off as a blog post.  Sunday I wrote two articles to submit to Mohawk Valley Living magazine.  I wonder if they were any good.  I can’t worry about that now.  Where was I?  Nowhere, it seems.

Now I am sitting here staring at the word “nowhere.”  My computer is not underlining it, but it looks wrong.  Like it really says “now here.”  These are the things that keep me from moving on to the next paragraph.

The next project I am dithering about is the murder mystery for Morning Star Methodist Church in Ilion, NY, planned for Saturday, April 28.  I think I have a situation, and the names of some of the characters.  I have a victim but not yet a murderer.  This is not uncommon.  Sometimes I write the whole script before I decide whodunnit.  You can do that with a ten-page script.  I wouldn’t try it with a 300-page novel.  No, I have not written a 300-page novel, but I have written 300 pages on a novel.  At least a couple of times.

And now I have written a 200 word blog post.  It looks kind of sad without any pictures of monsters.  Maybe I could include just one.

“Where have you been all my life?”

There you go:  a monster and a beautiful girl.  What’s not to like?  Oh, I’m sure somebody could find something. Once again, I’ll try for a better blog post tomorrow.

 

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A Monstrous Monday

Posted on March 20, 2018 by mohawkvalleygirl

I am sitting on my couch, laptop on my lap (good place for it), typing in words and backspacing them out.  This is not a good start to my blogging week.  Darn it, I’m tired!  I had a marvelous time at the Crusader’s Wine Tasting yesterday, and I worked ten hours today, got my articles for next month’s Mohawk Valley Living magazine submitted…  OK, I have no excuse.  Well, this is going to be a Monday Mental Meanderings post.  Maybe I should add a few monsters.  As regular readers know, I like monsters.

“Is this where the water aerobics class meets?”

I haven’t shared the Creature from the Black Lagoon in a while.  I think it’s kind of sad he doesn’t have a real name.  Do you suppose his friends call him Blackie?  Maybe ‘Goon?  Or Creach?  These are the things I think about when I am supposed to be writing a blog post.

“I told him not to lose his head.”

As I was searching my Media Library for Creach, I noticed this lovely shot of Peter Lorre and Vincent Price.  I decided to include it under the contention that people are the real monsters.  That is definitely an argument one can make.  In fact, as I typed that in, I overheard somebody on Snapped call the murderess a monster.  I would really like to finish this blog post so I can watch the next episode of that show, by the way.

Did she reach her breaking point? Or is she just a monster?

 

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That Elusive Fabulous Outfit

Posted on March 18, 2018 by mohawkvalleygirl

I think I mentioned that part of my Scattered Saturday yesterday was spent searching for a fabulous outfit to wear as Philomena Billingsford, wealthy philanthropist, in Secrets at Suiter House, the murder mystery soon to be presented as a fundraiser for the Herkimer County Historical Society.  I was unsuccessful, but I have time. What I have less time for, though, is to come up with something to wear TODAY!

We are going to an event as soon as Steven gets home from work.  I am getting a little worried, though, because our friend, Kim, who was supposed to drive, has not gotten back to me.  Of course it is no problem to drive or even walk there ourselves, but these things are far more fun with a friend.  As soon as I figure out what to wear.

The event in question is St. Anthony Crusader’s Annual Wine Tasting.  Hobby and professional wine makers offer samples of their wares, which will also be adjudicated by professional judges.  It runs from 1 to 3:30 p.m. today at the Herkimer, NY, VFW, I add in case I hit Publish and anybody reads this in time to go.  It should be a lot of fun; it has been in past years.

Cost is $10.  There are also prizes and raffles.  We did not win anything last year, but I won a beautiful necklace and earrings donated by Weisser’s Jewelers one year.  Ooh, maybe that should make up part of my fabulous outfit.

Anyways, this is my Wrist to Forehead Sunday post.  After all, what could be more swoon-worthy than having nothing to wear to a fun event coming up in — just over an hour!  Yikes!  Gotta go!

 

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Scattered Saturday: St. Patrick’s Day Edition

Posted on March 18, 2018 by mohawkvalleygirl

I pause in my Scattered Saturday gyrations to make my blog post.  Actually, I was pretty much done with the gyrating and on to the house cleaning and laundry doing portion of the day.  Unfortunately, I got an upset stomach, probably from indulging in too many treats (don’t judge me).  I am trying the effects of a cup of tea and sitting on the computer while I drink it.

The treats are from Click’s Cakes in Herkimer, NY, my last stop in the morning’s jaunt.  I paused and had an eclair, then selected a few yummies to take home and share with Steven.  Apparently a chocolate pustie is not a good substitute for a nutritious lunch.  Ooh, was it good, though!

My stop at Click’s was after a trip to Dolgeville, where I had planned to visit two places recommended to me by a work friend. The first, Stella’s Styles, was excellent.  I did not find a fabulous outfit for Secrets at Suiter House, but I did purchase an Easter (or something) present for… somebody.  From there I walked up Main Street to the Motor’s In.  I had a snack and wrote a few notes on my next murder mystery.

I confess to feeling a little sad this afternoon.  I wonder if I shouldn’t be somewhere with friends, drinking green beer or something, or maybe have gone to the parade in Utica.  I saw some of the coverage by WKTV News, it looked fun.  I’m wearing green, but I lack anything really showy, like a green feather boa or sequinned scarf.  My friend, Kim gave me a pair of earrings of a green top hat (I’m only wearing one; I rarely wear matching earrings).  However, now I am sitting at home, what fabulousness I could muster wasted. I suppose not entirely, if I enjoy it, so I content myself with that.

Having reached 300 words in my blog post, I now must roust myself from my funk and get back to my Saturday.  For one reason, I believe the laundry is done.  My tea is gone (it did help the tummy), and adventures in cleaning and organization await.  Happy St. Patrick’s Day, everybody!

 

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Weather or Not I’m Lame

Posted on March 17, 2018 by mohawkvalleygirl

Did you know that Tuesday is the first day of spring?

I particularly like the bare trees.

This is the view from my front porch.  I stepped out with my Tablet to capture a graphic demonstration of why I forgot that it is almost spring.

I’ve seen bigger snowbanks, but still.

Here is a view in the other direction.  My only pleasure is to see the bare sidewalks.  I have not been running lately and want to start again.  Perhaps tomorrow.

I love my tree.

This is not the best shot of this tree, I see now.  I thought as I took it that it might be better to move off the porch, perhaps even across the street.  However, I was in my slippers.  Hey, I bestirred myself to get off the couch.  I only have so much oomph on Lame Post Friday.  Or any other day.

Earlier this afternoon, my friend Kim and I went to a wine tasting at Valley Wine and Liquor.  We were not best pleased with the cold temperature, and even less so when it started snowing.

“Who ordered this?” she demanded.  I denied responsibility.  At least the wine tasting was good.  Perhaps I can write more about it in another post.

For right now, though, it is Lame Post Friday, and the best I can do is share these pictures and gripe about the weather.  You would think I would be in a better mood, if you thought about me at all, which I do not seriously expect.  Actually, that last sentence gave me a chuckle, which improved my mood.  Finishing my blog post improves the mood even further.  I hope to see you all again on Scattered Saturday, even if it does snow.

 

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It’s a Crime to Not Watch Movies

Posted on March 16, 2018 by mohawkvalleygirl

A distinguished cast of characters? Or a rogues gallery?  What’s bothering me is where is Cecil Kellaway?

I found this picture among my downloads recently and thought it might be a nice way to begin a Non-Sequitur Thursday post.  Full disclosure:  I have another one of my headaches in addition to feeling quite lazy and whiny today.  I suppose you never feel lazy and whiny (you know who you are).  Well, I will bestir myself to type a few words including as few petty complaints as possible.

The above picture, in case you didn’t know, is from Hush… Hush, Sweet Charlotte, one of my favorite movies.  My current profile picture on Facebook is Bette Davis in that flick:

“Oh, so you want a blog post, do you?”

I am feeling a little movie melancholy these days, because our DVD/VCR abruptly quit on us during the snow storm of March 2.  It happened right after we briefly lost power.  It seems a little odd, though, because we have a power strip, which I thought was also a surge protector.  The television and cable box emerged unscathed.  Phew!  The nice this that when we finally get a new player, we will not have seen all our favorite movies for a while.

One of my other favorites.

We don’t watch as many movies these days anyways.  As regular readers know, I am addicted to true crime television.  And when I really want a movie, I have a few on my DVR, including, if I am not mistaken, a couple of Hammer Horror flicks I recorded last October and haven’t watched yet.

Who could be uncheered by a vampire?

Or I could just read a book.

You were expecting War and Peace?

I see I am closing in on almost 300 words.  300 silly words, but aren’t they usually?  I’m going to watch a true crime show till bedtime.  Maybe a monster movie tomorrow.  Or perhaps I will have a Mohawk Valley adventure I can write a real blog post about.  As always, I hope you’ll stay tuned.

 

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