Tag Archives: monsters

It Will Probably Be a Monstrous Monday

Posted on April 1, 2019 by mohawkvalleygirl

Here’s a funny thing: in the past I have been posting at 4:30(ish) in the morning because I am posting late for the day before. Today I am posting early for TODAY!  I call that progress.  You see, I got up early for a different reason (not worth recounting), so I have a few minutes extra time, which I will not have tonight, so…

Still, this isn’t going to be much of a post.  I cannot completely disrupt my morning routine, or this will be an even more Monstrous Monday than usual.  I don’t even know how far down my Media Library I will scroll to find a few monster pictures to post.  Lame Post Monday?  Let’s not call it that; it only reminds me how far away Friday seems (which is not a completely bad thing, since I have a murder mystery on Saturday I am still getting ready for).

“You’re just getting up? It’s almost my bedtime!”

I’m thinking vampires hate summer, because they must spend more time hiding from the sun.  Then again, maybe they like the extra sleep.  I do not purport to know how a vampire feels, although I do not rule out guessing for the sake of fiction.

“Put my head back, you monster!”

Not exactly a monster, but two horror movie icons, Peter Lorre and Vincent Price (yes, I know I did not need to tell some of you).  It is an appropriate picture for me, because this week I may be running around like the proverbial chicken with its head cut off (writer’s trick:  you can use a cliche if you insert the words “the proverbial” in there; it’s kind of like “sic” but more hip) (or do I flatter myself?).

I know just how he feels. Come to think of it, I know pretty much how she feels, too.

A splash of color and a big ape to close this week’s Monstrous Monday post.  I gotta run now; I’m missing my Local on the Ones.  I feel more secure once I’ve heard the weather report.

 

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Pre-Rehearsal Monsters

Posted on March 26, 2019 by mohawkvalleygirl

Really, when you come to think of it, my life is pretty boring.

To begin this week’s Monstrous Monday post, I went to our laptop’s Downloads, to see if my husband, Steven, had downloaded any monsters I hadn’t used yet.  This is what I found.  I would love an outfit like the one that lady is wearing, but I am less enamored with her escort.  She looks as if she is regretting it as well.  You just can’t trust those on-line dating apps.

“Did somebody say Monstrous Monday?”

Finding no further treasures in the Downloads, I return to my Media Library and find my old favorite, Nosferatu (1922).  I should perhaps mention that I am posting in haste (posthaste, that is an old word seldom used these days), because I have a rehearsal this evening.  I feel fortunate that I don’t have any days of two rehearsals this week (unless we reschedule Wednesday’s rehearsal for Thursday, but I can’t worry about that now).  One murder mystery is in the books!  In less than two weeks, both murder mysteries will be over and done with, and I will only have to worry about Morning’s at Seven (the full-length play I am in at Ilion Little Theatre).  Regular readers may recall that I mentioned in a vague sort of way another theatre project I may have undertaken.  Well, it seems not, so Phew!

My happy face when I only have one rehearsal.

I hope to do a couple of longer posts, telling more about my theatrical endeavors, especially in case local readers might like to attend.  For today, though, I must say Happy Monday and may all your monsters be nice ones.

 

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Just Enough Brain for Monstrous Monday

Posted on March 5, 2019 by mohawkvalleygirl

You would not think I would need to resort to a Monstrous Monday on the fourth day of a four day weekend.  Then again, I’m going back to work after a four day break: how can I NOT feel monstrous?  And feel monstrous, I do.  I have suddenly been hit by a huge wave of I Can’t Do This.  Regular readers may recall that I have a bit on my plate these days.  However, I am well aware that other people have more, often with fewer resources than those which I enjoy.  What the hell am I complaining about?

I kind of feel like I’m being strangled.  I wonder if it would help to scream.

I thought it was time to throw in a monster.  This is the titular monster from The Tingler (1959), a William Castle masterpiece starring the wonderful Vincent Price. Here’s a Freudian typo:  when I went to Google the movie to find the year, I put “Thingler.”  That would be a combination of the Thing and the Tingler.  If it was a Christmas movie, it could be the Jingler.  If it could fly, it would be the Wingler.  If unmarried, the Singler.  I could go on.

The answer to feeling overwhelmed, other than remembering to breathe, which a good idea under any circumstances, is to do one thing.  Then you often find you can do another.  Soon you are on your way to Getting Stuff Done.  The One Thing I am working on now is my blog post, in case you haven’t guessed.  I think it’s time for another monster.

Why is she screaming? She can take him!  He has no muscles!

Here is a scene from House on Haunted Hill (1959), another Castle/Price delight.

I need a brain this big.

I looked for another monster picture, because I could not think of anything else to say.  This is The Brain from Plant Arous (1957).  I wish I had my usual brain, but since that seems not to be functioning, I would take one from any planet.  Hmm… my plan of Doing One Thing does not seem to be working.  I will hit Publish on this (if I can possibly think of a title), but I am not feeling inclined to move on to something else.  Oh dear.  Well, tune in tomorrow to see if I did.

 

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Wind and Witches on Monstrous Monday

Posted on February 26, 2019 by mohawkvalleygirl

I am sitting here listening to the wind outside howl and thinking how long it has been since I’ve watched The Wizard of Oz.  When it gets as windy as it is today, I always make the same joke. I think it is a pretty good one, but I daresay I flatter myself.

“When it’s like this, I worry somebody’s going to come along and drop a house on me.  It happened to a sister of mine.  Then the bitch stole her red shoes.  I wanted those shoes.”

Really, I think it would have been kinder to have offered the Wicked Witch of the West some grief counseling rather than stealing what was apparently some kind of family heirloom.  But I digress.

“Now what will I wear with my glittery red ball gown?”

I think a witch counts as a monster for Monstrous Monday, which of course is today.  For good measure, here is something more creature-ish.

“Those red shoes would look pretty spiffy with this outfit, too!”

According to a Facebook meme, sometime you have to put on the pointy hat and call out the flying monkeys, just to remind people of who they’re dealing with.  It would be a more effective threat if the Witch had not ended the movie in a steaming black puddle.

I’m afraid this has not been a very good post.  However, that makes my final picture appropriate.  I thought I would end on an inspirational note:

 

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Post Migraine Lame, with Monsters

Posted on January 19, 2019 by mohawkvalleygirl

Am I ever glad it’s Lame Post Friday!  And not just in a TGIF sort of way.  I had a perfectly dreadful migraine today. It’s still not quite gone but is much better.  I apologize for complaining about my ills.  I fear I am turning into one of those kvetches who is always pissing and moaning about something.  People will stop believing anything really hurts, if they even believe me now.  And if they do believe me, they will get tired of hearing it.

OK, new paragraph, new line of thought.

I typed that sentence in then sat here and stared at it.  This will never do.  In desperation, I turn to my Media Library and look for a monster picture.

He looks about as miserable as I felt trying to sleep earlier.

Vincent Price in The Tingler, one of my favorites (both the actor and the movie).  “Scream!  Scream for your lives!”  That is appropriate for today, since I thought to myself at one point, “I am in screaming pain.”  Only I did not scream.  Would it have helped?  Too late to find out now.  I am only in whining pain.  Oh, dammit, I’m talking about my ills again.  Quick, look for another monster.

Perhaps a few hundred years’ sleep is what I need, too.

That actor is all wrapped up in his part.  One thing about sleeping in a coffin, you would be unlikely to toss and turn.

Look at her give him the side-eye!

Maybe I should do the opposite of what the did in The Brain that Wouldn’t Die.  He saved his girlfriend’s head and looked for a new body to put it on.  I could cut off my aching head and replace it with one that doesn’t hurt.  Maybe a smarter one, too.  And with better hair while we’re at it.  Come to think of it, my body isn’t so great either, so why would I want to be keeping that?  Waaaait a minute!  I can’t get a whole new me!  Can I?  That’s getting too philosophical for me. Then again,  I do like to indulge in half-baked philosophy on Lame Post Friday.

His eyes look a little droopy.

I shall close this nonsense with The Brain from Planet Arous, since I am obviously making very little use of my brain today.  I hope you are all having an enjoyable Friday evening.

 

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Apparently I Can Write a Blog Post

Posted on January 16, 2019 by mohawkvalleygirl

I can’t have a Monstrous Tuesday; it’s not alliterative!  But here I am, doing nothing but read other blogs or look at Facebook when I meant to be making today’s post.  I should perhaps mention I am having a dreadful bout of Writer’s Blank.  At least, maybe this time it really is Writer’s Block, because there are words in my head that I intend to write.  Only when I sit down and put pen to paper, nothing comes out.

I found this gem by typing “monsters writing” into the search bar on Facebook.

Maybe it really is a discipline thing.  Perhaps if I gritted my teeth and forced myself to write the words I was thinking… Look, I already get sore muscles in my temples from grinding my teeth in my sleep, I do NOT need any more teeth gritting.  I really did sit down and write a sentence, which I immediately hated.  Oh, it was not the sentence you see at the top of this post.  I was trying to write my articles for Mohawk Valley Living magazine.

I imagine this was done with some gritted teeth.

I seem to follow a pattern with almost everything I write:  I can’t write it, I can’t write it, I can’t write it, I sit down and write it.  And I have yet to figure out how to skip any of the “I can’t write it”s.  I like to think the picture above is what might result if I tried.  For the uninitiated, it is from the 1980 movie The Shining, adapted from the Steven King book (by the way, they changed a LOT).  The main character is a writer, and this is all he has managed to come up with.

And now here I am approaching 300 words after I thought I couldn’t write at all.  So I guess that is one solution:  if you can’t write one thing, try something else.  Maybe I will be able to segue over to my articles next.  In the meantime, I’m going to call this a Tired Tuesday and drive on.  Maybe one picture of Nosferatu, just to cheer myself up.

“Wasn’t I supposed to be here on Monstrous Monday?”

 

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That’s Not Writing on Monstrous Monday

Posted on January 8, 2019 by mohawkvalleygirl

Now I remember why I so often have Monstrous Monday.  I am TIRED on Mondays!  And I want to make my blog post quickly and watch Dateline on OWN.

Nobody does. What am I complaining about?

All day at work today I thought about writing.  At least, throughout the day, off and on, I thought about writing.  I thought about writing my blog post.  I thought about writing the next murder mystery.  I thought about writing my next article for Mohawk Valley Living magazine.  I thought about writing a novel.  That last was more of a vague thought; for the others I actually formed words in my head I intended to put on paper.  However, as the writing books so helpfully point out, thinking about writing is not writing.

When it came time for break, the only thing I could manage was a few jottings in the food journal I am keeping this month.  I am writing down everything I eat, any exercise I get, and when I get a headache or feel light-headed.  I hope to do it for a month and look for patterns.  Being me, it is more likely that I will (a) forget to write things (b) lose the journal (c) get tired of the whole thing (d) start adding all kinds of commentary, thus obscuring the information and losing the purpose (e) any or all of the above.  But that is strictly by the way.  The point is: I am not writing enough.  Bad writer!  Get to work!

But… DATELINE!!!

Will I tear myself away from the television?  Will I continue to watch Dateline (full disclosure:  I have been giving it half an eye while I type this post) (as Truman Capote once said, this isn’t writing, it’s typing)?  Will I attempt to write WHILE watching Dateline?  A little uncertainty adds spice to my evening.  In the meantime, I think I need one more picture of a monster if this is to count as a Monstrous Monday.

 

“Are you going to write, or do I have to get tough?”

 

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Monsters and Shout-outs, What Day Is It?

Posted on January 3, 2019 by mohawkvalleygirl

What a way to start the new year!  Yesterday’s blog post was dumb and today I can’t even think of anything to write about!  Is 2019 the year I stop being a daily blogger?  SAY IT AIN’T SO!!!!  Then again, it is Wuss-out Wednesday.

Well, that was a lousy lead.  Where can I go from here?  I went back to work today and worked ten hours on my feet.  Um, I did not work on my feet, I stood on my feet while I worked at my job.  The first way sounds like I spent 10 hours giving myself a pedicure.  Imagine the toenails I could get that way!  But I digress.  The fact is, I am tired and somewhat brain dead.  I resorted to monsters yesterday and I am going to be bold enough to do it again today.  We can call it Mid-Week Monsters.  More Monsters at Mid-Week?  Titles are hard.

“Wasn’t I just here yesterday?”

Following yesterday’s dictum, I open with a vampire, Nosferatu to be exact.  I love that guy.

I should follow this guy’s example and have some coffee.   And go on a diet.

I took this fellow’s picture at the Old Barn Marketplace, on Route 5 in Little Falls, NY (you see I can multi-task: show monsters and give shout-outs to local businesses) .  Alas, they are closed for the season, but they will re-open in the spring.  I’ll be sure to visit them when they do, and write a blog post about it.

This is BEFORE he ate all of Margaret’s great treats!

Here’s a business that local readers can visit right away, the So Sweet Candy Cafe.  I don’t imagine the skeleton will be there before October, but you can find lots of yummy treats!  They are located on Varick Street in Utica, NY.

Well, this has not been a completely useless post after all.  I gave shout-outs to two local businesses and shared another picture of Nosferatu.  I wonder if I can find a peppy picture to close with and think of an appropriate title.

Sometimes even a monster has to relax.

This now seems more like a Non-Sequitur Thursday than a Wuss-out Wednesday post.  Well, it is one of those weeks where I can’t remember what day it is.

 

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Monsters Usually Help

Posted on January 2, 2019 by mohawkvalleygirl

“Am I late?”

When in doubt, open with a vampire.  I came across a new picture of one of my favorite guys earlier today on Facebook and downloaded it.  I should have known it would immediately come in handy when I realized I don’t have a whole lot to blog about today.

The fact is I am deep in the throes of a massive Post-Holiday and — even worse — End of Vacation letdown.  But I am uncomfortably conscious of really being someone “with nothing to complain about.”  I put it in quotes, because it is kind of a cliche.  Now it is not only post-Christmas and Back to Work that is bothering me, it is that everything I type in sounds so stupid to me! Have I suddenly lost all ability to write?  SAY IT AIN’T SO!!!

It’s no use:  I am down and, as I often say, sometimes you just have to feel that way until you don’t feel that way any more.  In the meantime, there is no point in dragging others down with me.  I’ll throw in a couple more pictures, maybe make a couple jokes, and call it a Tired Tuesday post.

Who can resist a sweet puppy?

I just peeked back at Facebook, and this cute card from the 1950’s caught my eye.  After all, I’m not ALL about monsters, murder and mayhem.

Do you recognize a young Christopher Lee?

However, since I am somewhat about monsters, murder and mayhem, I end with a picture of Horror Hotel (1960), which I recently found out is also known as City of the Dead, although it is really more of a village.  But I digress.

So this is my New Year’s Day Tired Tuesday post.  Here is a Freudian typo for you: I first put “Tried Tuesday.”  Get it?  I TRIED to make a decent blog post.  I shall try again tomorrow.  As always, I hope you’ll stay tuned.

 

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Post-Christmas Crime

Posted on December 29, 2018 by mohawkvalleygirl

I bet you thought I was going to say, “Post Christmas Lame.”  Well, this is Lame Post Friday, but as I am watching episode after episode of Dateline: Secrets Uncovered, and Crime and Christmas are alliterative, I went another way.

I like all the different Datelines.

I had originally intended to watch movies this afternoon, but I got interested in the first Dateline, and it turned out to be a two hour episode.  The next episode was a case that was also covered by Snapped.  I can never resist those!

I loves me some Snapped!

I knew I had to make my blog post, but I watched that episode till the end, because I could not remember exactly what happened (I watch a lot of these true crime things; I can’t keep track of all the details).  I started this post as the next Dateline started.  It is a case we have seen before, definitely not on a Snapped, because it is the husband accused of killing the wife and not vice versa.   Once again, I do not remember all the details, and it is a two hour episode.  Will we watch the whole thing or switch over to a monster movie?  Hmmmmm….

In any case, having something interesting to watch helps ease my post-Christmas letdown somewhat.  When I am feeling blue, murder or monsters often help.

 

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