Tag Archives: depression

Words to Lame By

Posted on June 28, 2025 by mohawkvalleygirl

Hello and welcome to another Late Lame Post Friday post.  I don’t know how much of a post this will be: I am dead of brain and low of spirit.  However, ten-finger typing usually cheers me up, and sometimes even my dead brain can be entertaining, to myself if nobody else (although I certainly hope to entertain a few people at least).

I am fortunate not to smell like what I feel like.

I was looking for a brain picture (from the Planet Arous or That Wouldn’t Die) but decided to go for poop instead.  I do not really feel too poopy  right now, just a little headachy, sluggish, and inclined to complain.  My Saturday stretches before me, with things to go, places to be, and people to do.  Or something like that.

Mine would and does on a regular basis.

There’s a picture illustrating my lack of brain!  One of my absolute favorite cheesy movies.  Sometimes I say to myself, “Why can’t I write shit like that?” as the Whoopi Goldberg character asked herself in the movie Soapdish.  In point of fact, I do not know if I can or cannot write shit like that.  I quite frankly do not spend enough of my time writing to find out.  Once again, I end my blog post with an oath to change.

My new words to live by. Um, they were also my old words to live by.

Will I succeed?  Will I fail?  Will I even make my Saturday blog post on Saturday?  For the answer to these and other burning questions (and a few questions of various other temperatures), stay tuned to Mohawk Valley Girl!

 

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Late Blog Posts Are Apparently an Option

Posted on March 22, 2025 by mohawkvalleygirl
     AAAAaaand the late posts continue, as I type in my Lame Post Friday post early(ish) Saturday morning.  I probably shall never feel I am up early again unless it is 5 a.m. or earlier, just so you know.  I open today with a bit of half-baked philosophy.  I was on Facebook yesterday and a friend posted a list of advice.  Most of it was pretty good, but one said to choose to feel happy, being sad should never be an option.  I flashed on drill sergeants saying, “Failure is not an option,” meaning of course that it was a shameful option (ooh, here I go philosophizing again).  Anyways, this is what I commented:
     Except the part about being sad should never be an option. Some things ARE sad, and sometimes we have to allow ourselves to feel sad. You can’t always choose how you feel. That said, you can tell yourself things that might help you feel better, you can choose to have a cheerful attitude, you can accept feeling sad and that might lead you to feel happy sooner. The whole “you can just decide to be happy” idea has caused me no end of grief and sadness, because I felt something was wrong with me when I would try to choose happiness and only end up feeling more depressed. Sorry about the long comment. Perhaps I should put it in a blog post.

How could you choose not to smile at this scene?

     I like to put I a picture after two long(ish) paragraphs.  This fits in with the theme, because it falls under the heading Little Things That Bring You Joy.  Longtime readers know my late dearly missed husband Steve and I liked to dress our skeleton Bonita for the season.  He was really a great one for decorating for various holidays.  I am unfortunately still trying to unbury my house from the mess I let it get into over the last few years (I confess since even before Steven died).  However, sometimes decorating the mess makes me feel a little cheerful.

Bert the Birtday Gorilla wanted to get into the act too.

     I’m afraid Bert looks more Hawaiin than Easter, but I did not want to spend too much time searching my house for decorations, and I felt it was the wrong thing to do to buy more stuff when I am trying to get rid of things (although the dollar store had some cute stuff!).  I felt good about myself that I had been cleaning for a while before I dressed up Bonita and Burt.
     Now I feel good about myself , because I have managed a blog post of over 400 words. Yay!  What will my Saturday bring?  I do not know, but I hope an on-time blog post.

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How Green Was My Blog Post

Posted on March 17, 2025 by mohawkvalleygirl

Once again, I do not have much to post about but feel my habit of posting early in the morning is a good one.  I could go with a Monstrous Monday post, I suppose.  Or for something different, since it is St. Patrick’s Day, I could look for green pictures in my Media Library.  It might be fun.

I don’t think I’ve used this picture more than once.

Here is an green lawn.  Not bright green, but I took the picture in April.  We must give it a chance.

Look at all those buds!

Here is a greener view: my patch of irises from bulbs my Mom and Dad gave me.  That was a good year for them.  They have not been so prolific recently.  I am not a very good gardener.

They say it’s not easy being green.

I was looking for something other than plants that was green, so here is Shrek.  I never saw any of the movies, although I have seen scenes from them.

“I eat books!”

And here is a really fun green guy!  It is the book return at Ilion Free Public Library.  So I guess I have had a Monstrous Monday after all.

Full disclosure:  I began today in a depressed frame of mind, trying to find the wherewithal to improve myself and my life.  I stared for a few minutes at “Add New Post,” fearing I had nothing to say and not wanting to say it anyways.  And here I am, at the bottom of a post and feeling a bit better.  I do not feel I could take on the world but perhaps that I might be able to accomplish just a few things.  Maybe even something worth blogging about.  As always, I thank you for tuning in.

 

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It Snow Joke that I’m Tired

Posted on February 19, 2025 by mohawkvalleygirl

I did not make my Tired Tuesday post yesterday, because I was, you guessed it, tired.  I actually did less Tuesday than I did on Monday.  Monday I cleared my driveway twice.  By “cleared my driveway” I mean I took off the top layer of fluffy stuff and cleared the plow pile-up as best I could.  Also I did a shovel-width on my front walk, in consideration of pedestrians, who usually end up walking in the road anyways, but I can’t help that.

For anybody not in the area, I just mention in passing that the Mohawk Valley has been pummeled with snow and ice since… I was about to say Saturday, but it got bad before Saturday.  Things were also bad on Thursday, because my rehearsal was cancelled (regular readers may remember I am in a play at Ilion Little Theatre), but I can’t remember other than that.  Listen to me whine.  I’m in a house with power, sipping hot tea while my furnace works away, and I don’t have to go to work.  Let’s count our blessings, shall we?

This was in March 2017, but you get the picture.

I throw in a picture to pep things up.  My deck actually looks different now, because I did not put the things on it away in the fall.  In my defense, my life fall apart in 2023 and I have not yet picked up all the pieces.  The ones I do pick up, I keep dropping.   I do not mean this as more whining; only, I try to cut myself a break sometimes instead of beating myself up, which has ever been my habit.

On the other hand, some might argue I deserve, maybe not a beating, but perhaps a stern talking to sometimes.  For example, Monday and yesterday I toiled mightily trying to get the ice off my front steps, at least for a wide enough space for me and the mailman to get up and down safely.  In my head I kept saying, “2005, Cindy.  You’ve had since 2005!”  2005 was when we moved in and had the porch roof replaced.  Steven and I are (were) big porch sitters.  The roof fellow did not put the gutter back.  I felt sure we could do it.  Perhaps we could have.  Perhaps I still can.  These thoughts did me no good as I managed to clear some for the ice.

I was relieved there was no mail on Monday.  Tuesday when I heard the mailman, I stuck my head out the door, quickly remembered I was in slippers and the porch was covered in snow, craned my neck around the door and asked were the steps OK and assured the mailman I tried, I tried!  He said I did great and it was a losing battle.  I thought that was very nice of him, because I really had not cleared all that wide a space, and his feet are bigger than mine.

Somebody got some fun out of the snow!

I close with a jolly picture, to give us cheerful thoughts.  It has not been warm enough for snowman building, and the wind chill has been prohibitive, but weather changes eventually.  If I manage to build a snowman, I will certainly write a blog post about it.  Once again, I thank you for tuning in.

 

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Will Making a Blog Post Help?

Posted on January 28, 2025 by mohawkvalleygirl

I am just going to admit it:  my depression is reaching epic proportions, and I must try to do more to combat it.  I took a walk of a full mile yesterday.  Exercise is a potent and often under-used anti-depressant.  I try to walk every day and have been managing to take at least short walks.  One can find other things to help (one being me, as usual).  I have read that doing virtually anything can relieve depression, and I have found that sometimes that works.  Not always, but often.

Tuesday has been a problematic day for me this month.

This by means of introduction to another Tired Tuesday post.  Writing has often worked as an anti-depressant for me.  Yesterday I finished a letter to a friend and walked with it to the post office (part of my mile).  By the end of the walk, I was feeling not too bad.  Oh dear, as I type this I begin fear today’s post qualifies for Truman Capote’s snide remark, “That’s not writing, that’s typing.”  Then again, I can’t worry about dead critics.

Random picture to make the post more interesting.

Once again I throw in a picture to pep up the post.  It is Vincent Price in House of Wax, rather a fun old horror movie.  I wonder if there is a stage version of it.  Or at least a play about a wax museum where the figures come alive and terrorize the other actors and the audience.  Perhaps I should write one.  That  would have to be more than mere typing.

In any case, I am over 250 words.  After missing two days (why do I feel the need to call attention to my failings?), I say OK.  I am off to do more to combat my depression!

 

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The Skull in the Snow

Posted on January 25, 2025 by mohawkvalleygirl

Alas, I failed to post yesterday.  Today is Lame Post Friday, which I think I can manage.  I sometimes have to ask myself, “What the hell, me?”  However, I really do not intend this blog as a means of therapy, where I air all my mental and physical ailments and hope by talking, talking, talking about them to find solutions.  I fear sometimes it becomes such a means, posting as I usually do off the cuff.  Never mind all that.  What I have to offer today as means of entertainment are a few silly pictures.

I did not clean my deck off.  Oh dear, is that my finger on the bottom?

We got some more snow last night.  Not a vast amount, but I thought it was just as well to push off the top layer.  In any case, I had to brush off my car if I wanted to go to the grocery store, which I did.  As it turned out, it was not a deep layer and it was quite fluffy.  My chore was not onerous.  As I was putting my shovel away behind the house, I noticed a skull in the snow on the deck.  It amused me so much, I went and got my phone to take a picture.

It’s funny that skulls often look kind of cheerful.

I walked up onto the deck to take a closer shot.  I suppose I should have shoveled the snow off the deck, but I can only do so much.  Perhaps in the weeks to come I can make a greater effort.

Now he looks like he’s resting peacefully.

I took one more shot, because I liked the angle.  I’m afraid this isn’t much of a post, but it will have to do for Lame Post Friday.

 

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Historical Society to the Rescue!

Posted on December 18, 2024 by mohawkvalleygirl

Fine daily blogger I am.  I missed three days.  At first I put “several” but then I counted.  Three is more like a few. I don’t make the rules.

I think Santa likes me anyways. He’s not a big reader of blogs, so I hear.

I threw in a photo right away.  This is Santa Claus, who was at the Herkimer County Historical Society last Saturday.  They were also selling cookies.  Yum!  I was in a perfectly dreadful mood and had been for some days.  I did not know what to do, but I wanted to support the Society, so I walked over.  The volunteers gave me a warm welcome (they know me from the murder mysteries) and invited me to hang out with them for as long as I wanted to.  Of course I did and had a wonderful time.

I wish the picture was a little clearer.

The Suiter House was beautifully decorated.  Of course I took a few pictures.

I don’t know who the lady in the portrait is.

We talked about Christmas villages, and how they tend to grow, sometimes out of control.  I thought the one on their mantle was just right.

No, I did not sit on his lap!

I did not tell Santa what I wanted for Christmas, because quite frankly, I have been bad all year and do not expect any presents, although I know Santa is something of a pushover, so I might in fact get something (that is not a run-on sentence, although I suppose a period might not have come amiss).

I felt very Christmasy and happy after my visit to the historical society.  I hope to volunteer there in the new year, to a greater extent than putting on the murder mystery.  That would probably make for some good blog posts.

The Herkimer County Historical Society is located at 400 and 406 Main St., Herkimer, NY.  You can visit their website at www.herkimercountyhistory.org

 

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Make Tea and a Blog Post and Call Me in the Morning

Posted on December 10, 2024 by mohawkvalleygirl

It seems I last posted early Thursday morning.  It is now mid-afternoon on Monday, and I could use a cup of coffee.  Or something.

Pause while I acquire a caffeinated beverage.

I made tea, but I found the Dyn’s Cider Mill mug.  I thought I could just about manage a Monstrous Monday post and perhaps get into some better blog posts as the week wears on.  I am feeling exceptionally useless lately.  I suppose the solution to that is to do something useful as say, “There!  What about that!”  Well, I did a load of laundry earlier and tried to clean out a tote in which I had thrown a ridiculous collection of things.  Perhaps tea and a blog post will revive me.

Some chicks don’t dig skinny guys.

Here is a shot from House on Haunted Hill, which I re-watched recently. It is a perennial favorite.  I refer, of course, to the original, produced by William Castle and starring Vincent Price.

“Hang a shining star upon the highest bought!”

I thought I would throw in a more seasonal monster with the Abominable Snowman, affectionately known as Bumbles, from Rudolf the Red-Nosed Reindeer.  I though he had lost all his teeth by the time he wanted to put the star on top of the tree.  Just another continuity gaffe.

OK, he can call me a ho.

And another seasonal monster.  I need to find a Santa hat to put on Elliott Ghoul, who stands in my dining room window.  I put one on the Ghost that acts as a living room light.

Perhaps over the next few days I will complete my meager Christmas decorations and take some pictures for the blog.  I know some regular readers are interested to see Bonita’s Yuletide garb.

 

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Post Thanksgiving Tired

Posted on December 4, 2024 by mohawkvalleygirl

And now welcome to a late Tired Tuesday post, or perhaps it will be a Tiresome Tuesday post.  We shall see.  In a previous post I said that other people’s problems are tiresome. What I really meant was MY problems are tiresome, and I try not to burden others with them, with little notable success.  I don’t mind listening to other people’s problems, up to a point.  I even try to refrain from offering advice, again with little notable success.  Advice is even more tiresome to listen to than problems, but few of us can refrain from offering it.

All that said, I go on to tell you that my depression is kicking my butt.  Holidays are especially difficult.  On top of missing my husband with an ache that will never go away, there is the overwhelming feeling of, “It is a Holiday!  You MUST be happy!” Indeed, I was greatly looking forward to Thanksgiving and seeing my family.  And I did enjoy myself.  I rarely feel dreadfully down all day long, so I have that going for me.

My attempt at culinary artistry.

I thought I should throw in a picture to lighten things up.  Yes, I had fun at Thanksgiving.  I love my family.

I forgot where I was going with this post, but I see I am over 200 words.  We’ll just call it another placeholder post, and I will try for something other than a Wuss-out Wednesday post, on time or late.  Once again, thank you for tuning in.

 

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I Try to Run Away from Depression

Posted on November 6, 2024 by mohawkvalleygirl

I went for a run this morning and thought to do a Running Commentary Post.  Full disclosure:  I was trying to run away from the depression that threatens to overwhelm me. In the immortal words of Young Frankenstein:  It! Could! Work!  (If you do not get the reference, I encourage you to seek out Mel Brooks’ Young Frankenstein) (I would really like to insert a picture of Gene Wilder, which I know is somewhere in my Media Library, but I do not feel up to searching for it)

I set out before breakfast but after coffee.  My legs were almost immediately shrieking at me, “We didn’t sign up for this!”  I reminded them that they did too sign up for it (at least, I signed them up which is practically the same thing), that they had run for 30 minutes two days ago and walked for longer than that yesterday.  To no avail.  They impersonated overcooked macaroni for the entire run.  However, if nothing else, I know how to persevere.  To an extent.

I couldn’t blame him for taking a good look.

It was soon clear this was not going to be a 30 minute run.  However, I encouraged myself to at least make it a mile.  Maybe even 20 minutes.  All I wanted was to sit down.  I ran through Meyers Park, wondering if I shouldn’t just go home from there.  I have a picture of Meyers Park in my Media Library, I thought.  It will look good in the blog post.  Then I thought I could run past the post office and up to my beloved Herkimer Historical Four Corners.

Oh, my body did not want to! But through persuasion and stubbornness, I kept going.  I thought of cutting through parking lots in back of my four corners, to make a shorter run, but then I thought, No!  Run by the 1834 Jail and let Chester Gilette take a good look!  After some internal debate, Chester won.  I didn’t even cut a small corner and run over the memorial bricks which help finance jail restoration (note to self:  I must sponsor a brick in honor of my late husband, Steve).

So the run was just over 20 minutes, about a mile and a third.  Chester was the only picture I could readily find in my Media Library, so my blog post only has one illustration.  However, I see I am approaching 400 words.  It is much easier to type than to run, but then, I only have two legs but I have ten fingers.  As always, I thank you for tuning in.

 

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