Category Archives: humor

Fun and Games on Scattered Saturday

Posted on March 17, 2019 by mohawkvalleygirl

He looks mean, doesn’t he?

I was hoping for a picture of a big explosion to start off this week’s Scattered Saturday post, because that is pretty much how Demolition Man (1993) begins.  It is what we are watching now.  I suggested it because it is a funny, fun, fast-paced flick.  We had just watched The Bad Seed (1956), a perennial favorite of ours.

Isn’t she sweet?

Our day was even more fun before we got to the movie-watching portion.  We went to Little Falls for the grand opening of Meeples Mug House, the new board game cafe.  We played gin and then Yahtzee, in between enjoying a delicious sandwich (me) and soup (Steven).  I’ll write more about Meeples in another post (preview of coming attractions).

I took more pictures for subsequent use.

Before that, I went running and, um, not much else.  I made a phone call to arrange donating an afghan to the H.A.L.O. Chinese Auction tomorrow at the VFW (another preview of coming attractions).  While watching movies, I did a load of laundry and popped a bowl of popcorn (yum).  It was Aversa’s Popcorn, just to add a little local flair to the post.

For local readers, the HALO Chinese auction is at the  Herkimer VFW from 11 a.m. to 2 p.m.  HALO is the Helping Animals Live Organization, a no kill, not for profit, cat rescue group.

Meeples Mug House is located at 598 E. Main St., Little Falls, NY.  They are open from 5 to 9 p.m. Thursday, 5 to 10 p.m. Friday, 2 to 10 p.m. Saturday, and 2 to 8 p.m. Sunday.

And that brings me over 200 words, which regular readers will remember I consider respectable.  I WILL write more about Meeples, possibly in an article in Mohawk Valley Living magazine.  I will also write again about H.A.L.O.  Right now, however, I have knitting to do, and I have to watch Sylvester Stallone kick Wesley Snipes’ butt in Demolition Man.  Happy Saturday, everyone.

 

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Monstrous Friday?

Posted on March 16, 2019 by mohawkvalleygirl

“You’re asking ME for a blog post idea?”

It’s that sad moment when I do not even feel up to making a Friday Lame Post.  I just sat here, alternately scrolling down Facebook and staring at a blank WordPress Add New Post page, and I really, truly, got nothin’.  I thought if I opened with a picture of Noseratu (1922), it might spark something.  So far, not much.  However, I am up to 50 or so words, so that’s something.

Quick: which one is me?

I throw in a pic from House on Haunted Hill (1959), just to keep the picture-and-nonsense theme going.  We do love House on Haunted Hill.  William Castle, Vincent Price, what’s not to like?

I’m a little cleaner that this chick, at least.

Carrie (1976) is a bit more graphic than either Nosferatu or House on Haunted Hill, but I include the picture, because I feel just about as stunned as Sissy Spacek looks in this shot.  This is one reason that Lame Post Friday is looking increasingly like Monstrous Monday.  How mortifying.  I can’t even think of a good headline incorporating the word “lame.”  Maybe if I add one more monster picture, something will come to me.

So why am I NOT howling?

Yes, what is it with me? Friday night, and I’m not howling.  I’m not out partying heartily till the wee hours.  Is this what getting older is like?  Damn!  Then again, if I stop trying to type something entertaining (or at least) coherent into my blog post, I can sit here with my knitting, and perhaps my Friday will become a little more enjoyable.  In the meantime, thank you for tuning in, and I hope to see you all for Saturday’s post, whatever it turns out to be.

 

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Rapunzel, I’m Not

Posted on March 15, 2019 by mohawkvalleygirl

Here is a good idea for a Non-Sequitur Thursday post:  a PRE-shout-out to a local business I am ABOUT to go to.  And I’d better hustle up, or I won’t have time to shower first.  Oh dear, do I even have time if I hustle?  Well, I’ll just start typing and see what I can do.

My hair has been growing at its usual annoying rate, that is, fast till it gets to where I can’t do anything with it and then stop.  I was undecided to cut or not, because I did not know what my director wanted for the play I’m in (remember? Morning’s at Seven at Ilion Little Theatre) (the murder mysteries don’t matter; I can make any number of ‘do’s work for them).  When the stage manager said she had a grey wig that would work for me, my first question was, “So it’s OK if I get my hair cut really short?”  It was.

Hence, I have an appointment with Clair, my usual stylist at The Hot Spot Salon and Spa in Herkimer.  I decided I might as well have a pedicure while I was at it, if the appointment time was available.  It was!  The appointment is for five tonight.  When I made the appointment, the lady making it said I would be out by about quarter after six.  Perfect for a six-thirty rehearsal in Ilion!  I hope.

Hmm… this is kind of a boring blog post.  It might have been more interesting if I had waited till after the appointment.  I could have included a picture of my toes, at least.  Well, I can’t help that.  I have a shower to take.  My appointment is for a cut without shampoo and blow-dry (I get a REAL low-care cut).  I still don’t know what I’m going to wear to rehearsal.  How flustered I get!

The Hot Spot Salon and Spa is located at 121 E. Albany St., Herkimer, NY, phone number 315-866-9113.  You can also Like them on Facebook.

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Witless But Deadly

Posted on March 14, 2019 by mohawkvalleygirl

Well, I spent another day NOT writing a blog post while on breaks at work.  In my defense, my light-headed-ness continued.  In my — what? accusation? prosecution?  Somebody get me a thesaurus! — it was not as bad as yesterday.  Well, these things happened, and blog posts must be made.  Why, you may ask.  I say, because they are not there.  See what I did there?  Thus, mildly pleased with myself, I continue with this week’s Witless Wednesday post.

She is cold, yes.

First I throw in a random picture, so this can be a kind of a Wordless Wednesday as well (not that I am every completely wordless).  Here is Bette Davis, committing the murder that begins The Letter (1940).  I thought a picture from a murder movie would be appropriate, because the rehearsal I am about to go to is for a murder mystery.  Unfortunately, the murder in The Letter is no mystery.  At least, not unfortunately for the movie; it’s a great movie.  Unfortunately for the picture being entirely appropriate.  I did mention this is Witless Wednesday, did I not?

Judith Anderson and Vincent Price.

Here is a picture from an authentic murder mystery, Laura (1944).  In my mind, this is the real romantic couple of the picture, never mind Gene Tierney and Dana Andrews.

I don’t imagine it was trivial to the victim.

The murder mystery we are rehearsing is A Trivial Murder, an interactive dinner theatre to be presented March 23 at the Travel Lodge in Little Falls, NY, to benefit Herkimer County Historical Society.  Doors open at 5, dinner starts at 6. Cost is $25 per person.  For more information, contact the historical society at 315-866-6413.

 

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Jazz is the Answer!

Posted on March 13, 2019 by mohawkvalleygirl

Music is magic.  I’ve known it for years.  Let me tell you how I was just reminded about it today.

I spent the day at work muddling through.  I don’t know if it was a kind of a migraine or spring allergies kicking, but I felt light-headed and nauseous all day.  Sorry to complain; just giving you the picture.  I thought I would have to take a Blogger’s Sick Day and wondered if I would make it to rehearsal for Morning’s at Seven, the play I am in at Ilion Little Theatre.

Eventually I got some ginger ale out of the machine, which helped the nausea.  I tried to feel thankful that it was light-headedness and not pain.  Counting one’s blessings can go a long way.  I came home and laid down for a while with my heated face mask, then had some coffee and food.

While all this was going on, I knew I had to make a blog post. Of course I did not write one while at work, muddling. Pondering what I could write, I checked my email and Facebook notifications.  I tried to forget how light-headed I was still feeling.  This was difficult, because it is not easy to hold a thought in such a light head (cue jokes about how that must often be the case for me).

As I sat here in front of a blank screen with increasing feelings of panic (I have to leave for rehearsal in less than an hour), Steven said he was going upstairs to lie down (fine wife I am; I didn’t even ask what was wrong).  I asked him to turn off the television or put it on one of the music channels.

“1945,” I suggested, picking the one I have memorized, because it is a year.  Suddenly, jazz was bouncing out of the television, and my fingers were on the keys and ready to type.

It has always been this way with me.  I remember sitting at my parents’ house, when I lived there.  I had Mom’s portable typewriter set up on the coffee table, paper rolled in, novel notes nearby, and I felt blank.  I put on a record album.  It was the soundtrack of StarWars, as I recall (it was the 1970’s).  It turns out, instrumental music is a writing trigger for me.

It is not my only trigger.  Sometimes I can write quite handily on breaks and before starting work with various factory sounds around me.  The ambient noise of a diner or bar works fine.  Sometimes the relative quiet of the library is nice.

Now I am over 400 words and I have about a half hour till I’d better leave.  So I guess this is my Tired Tuesday post.  Not a long whine about not being able to write, but a short story about how I managed to write… something.  Something good?  Well, we don’t ask for miracles on Tired Tuesday.

 

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Monsters, Can You Help Me Now?

Posted on March 12, 2019 by mohawkvalleygirl

As I walked into work this morning, I came up with a rather depressing description of a Monday through Friday job:  Five days of hell, two days of hangover.  It amused me in a cynical sort of way, although I doubt it is original and I assure you it is not accurate for me at least.  However, it seemed a good enough intro for a Monstrous Monday post.

Monday! Bad!

My job, of course, is not hell.  It has its drawbacks, as any job does, and I increasingly dislike being forced to get up in the morning.  I like to BE up early in the morning; I just don’t like to GET up.  I’m sure you now what I mean.

Where was I going with this?  Ah yes, Monstrous Monday.

“Was somebody looking for a monster?”

I have a bear of a week ahead of me, with rehearsals, writing, and a hundred issues and details to be dealt with.  It is my own fault, of course. So are hangovers, but in neither case does that make it any better.  Full disclosure:  I don’t often get hangovers, but when I do, they SUCK!

For the future, I can resolve to drink less, no matter how yummy it is.  However, can a similar resolution help me with my overloaded theatre schedule?  Just say no, you may advise.  Many people have no problem whatsoever with this (hence, our common community theatre casting woes).  What, I ask, is my problem?  Is it my eagerness to be loved?  My love of theatre?  The undeniable thrill I get from being onstage?  Or — and I think I may have something here — is it all the times in my misguided youth when I auditioned, auditioned, auditioned and almost never got cast?

Speaking of eagerness to be loved.

Now I fear I am straying into psychological territory way above my pay grade.  If I am trying to resolve issues from my youth, I am way more pathetic that I like to think I am.  Let’s end this analysis right here.  For one reason, I have lines to study.

 

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A Little Help from Elsa

Posted on March 11, 2019 by mohawkvalleygirl

Hello, and welcome to another Wrist to Forehead Sunday.  I am tired and discouraged, but there is no point in going on about it.  For one reason, somebody is sure to point out that other people have way worse problems than mine and I should just be grateful that… something or other.  I hate it when people tell me to “just be grateful that –”  I’ll be grateful when I’m good and ready!  Right now I’m complaining!

Only right now I am trying not to complain but to make a half-way decent blog post (cue jokes about the usual quality of my blog posts).  I was going to do my usual Sunday Cinema;  we started the movie watching portion of our day shortly after noon.  However, I cooked an actual Sunday dinner and we put the television on Snapped while we ate.  It’s still on, but the current episode is one I’ve seen more than once.  Maybe I can mention the movie we did watch and list a few others we might watch next.  After I hit Publish.

Doesn’t it look mysterious and spooky?

We wanted something scary but one we had not seen recently, so I suggested The Spiral Staircase (1946), which we have on VHS (just to show how old school we can be).  I was hoping to find a picture with Elsa Lanchester, but her part isn’t all that big.  Still, we love Elsa Lanchester, so I suggested we have an Elsa Lanchester film festival.  We could continue the spooky theme with Bride of Frankenstein (1935).

I should have had such a ‘do on my wedding day.

After that, we could watch Witness for the Prosecution (1957).  Elsa Lanchester’s role in this film is neither in the short story nor the stage play, but she is the best character in the flick.

This is also Bride of Frankenstein. Isn’t she pretty?

That is the picture I was looking for when I mentioned Bride.  I got tired of scrolling and looking through my Media Library so used the other one.  Then I found it when I was looking for the next picture. Just a little insight into my blogging methodology.

Spoiler alert: He doesn’t murder her.

Next we might go color with Murder By Death (1976).  That is a star-studded romp, and the first video I ever gave Steve, back when we were dating.  We have it on DVD now.

How many can you name?

Well, we won’t have any time to watch any movies if I don’t finish this post and hit Publish.  At least I’ve typed myself into a better mood. Happy Sunday, folks!

 

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Saturday Fun in Herkimer

Posted on March 10, 2019 by mohawkvalleygirl

My husband, Steven, and I made a few stops this afternoon.  I brought along my Tablet and took pictures at each one, for a proper Scattered Saturday post.  Let’s see if I can actually make one.

I foolishly did not get the name of the fellow doing the pouring.

Our first stop was at Valley Wine and Liquor in Herkimer for a tasting by Thousand Islands Winery. Alas,they were not pouring any of their dryer wines,but we enjoyed talking to the young man pouring.  From there we went to Hummel’s Office Plus for some paper for our printer.

Look at all that paper!

After that, we stopped at a new business in Herkimer, Wakefield Furniture. Full disclosure:  we do not need any furniture at the present time.  However, the next time we do, we will go to Wakefield. They are very nice, in addition to having a very attractive store showcasing some lovely items.

I LOVE a tall table!

One of the first things to catch my eye was a tall table with matching stools. However, there was another table which I wonder would not be even better for my house.

I don’t know if this picture properly captures this table’s beautiful top.

Leaving the furniture store, I had the silly idea we should do a little bar hopping, a pastime in which we rarely indulge these days.  Accordingly, we stopped at the Endzone Pub and Grub.

They carry a lot of beers at the End Zone.

Can you read “Herkimer” on the shirt?

We admired the ceilings at the End Zone.  Wakefield also had lovely ceilings, but I neglected to take a picture.

After the End Zone,we stopped at Pete’s Tavern, at which we tried our luck at a couple of scratch-off lottery tickets.

This was our nice bartender, Cecelia.

I won $10 on one, $2 of which I re-invested in another scratch-off.  That one was not a winner, but I got a $1 scratch-off that won me $2, so I was still $8 up.

The other pub in close proximity was Asteroga Ale House, so we stopped there as well.  We had a cup of clam chowder along with our wine. Very tasty.

I do not remember this lady’s name.

The we finally went home.  Full disclosure:  I am having another glass of wine as I type this. I hope it still makes a fun blog post. Happy Saturday, everyone.

 

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Post Rehearsal Post

Posted on March 9, 2019 by mohawkvalleygirl

I thought for a change I would do a Post Rehearsal Post. I know, I almost always have a Lame Post Friday, but for one reason, I have had a number of lame posts lately.  For another, I would like to begin plugging A Trivial Murder, the interactive dinner theatre we are putting on to benefit Herkimer County Historical Society.  Regular readers might remember that mystery was originally scheduled for last October but was postponed.  It has been rescheduled for March 23, and we are in rehearsal mode.

Full disclosure: there was actual wine in those glasses.

The mystery begins with a toast to Jack German, the previous host of Who Knows Herkimer History? He died under mysterious circumstances.  Somebody claims to know something about those circumstances. Will he or she meet with an untimely end?

 

One taking notes, one grief-stricken, one blase. Which is sincere?

 

The plot thickens!  Of course, I cannot tell you much about the actual plot, since I am hoping to entice local readers to attend the murder mystery.  I think it is going to be highly entertain, but perhaps I flatter myself.

Accusations fly!

A Trivial Murder is scheduled for Saturday, March 23, at Little Falls Travel Lodge, doors open at 5 p.m.  Tickets are $25 for dinner and the show.  For more information, contact Herkimer County Historical Society at 315-866-6413.

 

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Murder Mystery Memories

Posted on March 8, 2019 by mohawkvalleygirl

How about a fast Throwback Thursday post instead of the flustered Non-Sequitur Thursday post that I really feel is more along the lines of what I am capable of at this moment.  I am soon to hurry to a rehearsal of Morning’s at Seven, pausing on the way to drop off a script for A Trivial Murder.  Everything will be fine.  I don’t have to be off book tonight.

You may remember these suspicious characters.

Here is a good murder mystery memory: A G.R.A.V.E. Murder, which we presented in October 2017 to benefit the Herkimer County Historical Society.  I am looking forward to A Trivial Murder, which is also for the historical society.

Don’t you just love my hat?

And here is another murder mystery memory:  Donate to Murder, which LiFT, the Little Fall Theatre Company, presented at Herkimer Elks Lodge this past September.  I hope they invite us back.

I may wear those same shoes for Morning’s at Seven.

I like these pictures so much, I think I’ll share a couple more.  Here’s me and Steve and our buddy, Tucker, in the middle.  I wrote Tucker’s character especially for him, after he told me what sort of person he would like to portray.  I think I’ll close with a picture of the character, Renwick Spaulding.

“You wanna see my bug collection?”

Happy Thursday, everyone!

 

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